stripedleopard
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Nightmares have always haunted Dean. First it was his mother's death, then when he starting hunting he had different nightmares. After hell and purgatory, he's got lifetimes of nightmares.
These new ones are different. These new ones, he sees every time he closes his eyes.
They defeated Chuck, installed a new God, and now Dean has to live with the aftermath.
He doesn't know if he can.
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Mild AU for s05e14 My Bloody Valentine:
His vessel was starving. No matter how many burgers Castiel ate, he couldn’t get full.
There was something else too. A drive inside of him, a hunger that wasn’t physical. It was a hunger that was growing below his stomach, an ache that he needed to fill.
What was this feeling? Castiel had never felt anything like it before.
That was a lie. He was pretty sure he knew what it was. It was lust. It was lust for a certain green-eyed man who Cass wanted to devour.
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For some of us, it’s easy, close your eyes, take a breath, and jump. For others, it takes an entire bottle of whiskey, a slow, unreliable internet connection, and years of self-induced isolation on a picturesque mountainside to do what they have to do. What they need to do. Many years after losing his own pack, his family, an act he blames himself for, Alpha-Were Castiel is skilled at not giving himself even the smallest of pleasures, including that of a pack. An alpha needs a pack. It’s written into their DNA. It’s so much more than just having a mate. It’s the pack bonds that make an alpha whole, and the longer Castiel denies himself one, the more he loses of his humanity.
When a drunken, desperate act brings a beautiful, vibrant omega to his doorstep with a disastrous winter storm nipping at his heels, Castiel knows he does not deserve the gift. Sending Dean back down the mountain would be certain death for the young were, but allowing him to stay will undoubtedly change Castiel’s life forever. Maybe it’s time for Castiel to leave his darkness in the past, where it belongs. With Dean standing next to him on the precipice, there’s nothing left for Castiel to do but close his eyes, take a breath, and leap.
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Bookmarked by stripedleopard
06 Aug 2026
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“The tree was guarded by a pack of djinn… think I’m technically married to their queen now.”
-Castiel, ScoobynaturalDean has Cas back alive after four months with the help of a djinn queen, Cas’ apparent wife. He still doesn’t understand a lot, though, about the exact circumstances of Cas’ marriage or what it means about Cas’ confession to him. Worse, Dean knows it’s just a matter of time before Cas and Sam figure out exactly what he did in his determination to see Cas again. He knows it won’t go over well. It doesn’t help that he hasn’t been able to get even his four hours of sleep since Cas died and can’t talk about the events of that night to Sam or Jack, even now.
Bookmarked by stripedleopard
02 Aug 2026
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Dean knows exactly why he’d pulled Cas out of the Empty. It’s not charity. It’s selfishness. He’d made Cas lose his paradise, the version of life the Empty had created for him with his mirage of Dean, just because Dean was too scared to be alone. Dean had promised Cas that he’d pretend for him. He’d said he’d do whatever Cas needed to be as happy here as he’d been in the Empty’s reality. But Dean doesn’t even know how to be the person Cas thinks he is.
Either Cas is lying, or his standards are impossibly low. Cas apparently thought it’d be enough for him just to be near Dean. But that’s not what love should be. It should want something back. Dean’s own feelings are irrelevant. He wants Cas, wants to be someone who deserves him. He can’t have him. He can’t construct a monologue about his reasons for loving Cas like Cas had done for him. He’s pretty sure that holding Cas’s hand would make him combust, after so long subsisting on scraps of shoulder-pats and Cas only touching him to heal him.
Bookmarked by stripedleopard
02 Aug 2026
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But that’s the whole reason he’s here, isn’t it? He’s not out here hunting Humans. He’s not even hunting deer, or bears, or anything else that featured in Bambi. He’s out here, freezing his nuts off every night, because he’s hunting Angels.
Sometimes Dean wishes that Angels were like how they’re described in the Bible. How people from time too old for him to care much about thought Angels were messengers and warriors of God, protectors of Humans. He knows that how they’re really described in the Bible is actually pretty terrifying, but at least they were told by God that they’re supposed to love Humans, right?
That’s a thousand times better than what Angels really turned out to be.
Written by: riseofthefallenone
Artist and co-author: limonadegaby- Language:
- English
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Bookmarked by stripedleopard
01 Aug 2026
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Two years after the events of 15.19 and seemingly past the worst of his grief, Dean takes care of a depowered Jack far from a life of hunting. Meanwhile, Sam has turned the Men of Letters' bunker into the base of operations for hunters across the United States, sharing resources, knowledge, and intel in one massive network.
Dean has given up hope for Cas' return from the Empty, but Sam secretly continues to look for a way.
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Bookmarked by stripedleopard
19 Jul 2026