Chapter Text
Morning light crept through the curtains, harsh and unwelcome. I woke up with my chest still tight from last night — from all the things I didn't say.
I didn’t hear anyone outside the room. I could only hear Will’s soft breathing, as if he was still having a deep dream.
I stared at the ceiling for a while, replaying fragments of the past few days. Will’s laugh. His hands. The way everything between us felt charged, like a wire pulled too tight. Every time I tried to push the thoughts away, they came back louder, sharper.
Just stop, I told myself, squeezing my eyes shut.
It didn’t work.
The air in the room suddenly felt too warm. I decided to go outside — to get out of this house. Away from him and away from that heavy guilt in my stomach.
I grabbed a jacket and slipped downstairs, quiet enough so nobody could hear me. My bike was waiting outside, and I didn’t think twice before taking off down the empty street.
The wind felt good against my face. I could finally relax and it helped push away the thoughts I had in my head — El’s absence, Will’s disappointment, the way my heart couldn’t stop beating rapidly whenever he was near..
I pedaled faster, as if I was trying to escape from someone chasing me.
I wasn’t paying attention to anything else. Not really.
That pothole appeared out of nowhere. I swear.
My front wheel caught it hard, and suddenly I was airborne — stupidly — before crashing down onto the pavement.
Pain exploded through my right arm as I hit the ground, skidding across rough concrete.
-’’Oh, shit—’’ I gasped, clutching my arm.
Blood was already running down my sleeve, which had ripped, revealing a large scratch from my elbow to my wrist. When I tried to move my arm to stand up, the pain made me tense the entire muscle.
I sat there on the empty street, breathing hard, feeling like a complete idiot.
Of course. Of course it had to happen!
I don’t know how, but I managed to get back on my bike with only one hand. I started pedaling slowly home while cradling my injured arm against my chest, staining the entire jacket. Every bump in the road sent waves of pain through me.
By the time I finally reached the house, I was sweating and dizzy.
Will was the first person I saw when I got in front of the door. I guess he was worried because I disappeared without saying anything for about an hour.
His eyes went wide immediately when he saw me.
-’’Mike! Where were you?— oh my god, you’re bleeding?!’’
He rushed over before I could say a word and started trying to cover my injury with the torn pieces of my jacket sleeve. He seemed afraid of accidentally touching my arm or skin, but also desperate to help me.
-‘’Will, don’t worry. It’s nothing.’’ I muttered, but my voice came out weaker than I intended.
-’’Stop. It’s not nothing!’’ His tone was firm, worried. ‘’Come, please. Sit down here.’’
He helped me lean on his shoulder so I could walk. He guided me to the sofa, like a gentleman, and I let him. His touch made me forget the pain for a few seconds.
-’’Don’t move. I will be right here in a moment.’’ He said in a soft voice.
Moments later, Will and Joyce appeared with a kit. Will stayed with me the whole time. Will was who carefully cleaned the wound while I winced. Will was who wrapped the bandage with steady and careful hands…
His fingers lingered for a second after tying the knot, like he wasn’t sure if he should pull away.
I looked up — and he was already looking at me. Too close.
For a moment neither of us moved. The room felt smaller, quieter.
*Say something* — my brain begged — *Anything.*
But all I could think was how warm his hands still felt around my wrist.
-’’You should be more cautious, Mike.’’ He said, trying to avoid eye contact again. As usual.
-’’I know.’’
He gathered everything and put it in the kit.
-’’I'm going to let you rest a little. You really should get some sleep.’’ He said.
And with that, he stood up, ready to leave, but my words stopped him.
-’’Will.’’ I said. ‘’Thanks… for everything. I owe you one.’’
-’’Hah, you don’t have to. I know that you would do the same for me.’’
And those words got marked in my head.
The rest of the day passed slowly — like everything slowed down.
Sometimes Will came downstairs to check if I was okay. Every time I caught him looking at me, he’d glance away like he got caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to. I pretended not to notice. Pretending was easier.
At dinner time, Joyce was talking about new anecdotes from work, making the awkward space not feel uncomfortable. Will sat across from me, elbows tucked in, careful not to brush my injured arm when he passed the salt.
That tiny effort shouldn’t have meant anything.
It did.
The hours stretched. We stayed in the same rooms, orbiting each other without touching. Every almost-conversation died before it started. Words kept lining up in my head, ready to jump — just say it — but fear shoved them back down.
By the time night came, my chest felt tight again.
I stared into the dark, examining every single detail from the ceiling, since sleep didn’t come.
Every time I closed my eyes, the only thing I could think about was Will helping me with my injury. The way he was so worried… everything.
*Just… ugh, I should sleep.*
I turned my back and the bed started creaking.
Will heard it.
-’’Mike, you… awake?’’ — He asked.
-’’Nope.’’
I started laughing quietly like an idiot but stopped because I could feel WIll’s serious stare on the back of my neck.
I turned around again, making more noise, and tried to find his eyes in the darkness.
-’’Okaay. Yeh…! But, uhm… Will, why are you awake too? It’s too late.’’
-’’Kinda hard to sleep when your bed sounds like it’s dying.’’ He said.
*Oh. Shit.*
-’’Fuck, Will. I’m sorry. I just can’t find a comfortable position with this thing around my arm.’’
-’’It’s okay. What about you? Why can’t you… sleep?’’ – He asked with that sleepy voice of his.
I didn’t know what to say.
So I did what I’ve been doing a lot lately — I lied.
I couldn’t tell Will I was thinking about him… That would be so messed up.
*You’re taking so long answering. Say something!*
-’’Yeh, sorry. It was because of what I said before…’’
I have been lying too much lately.
A minute of silence passed before he spoke again.
-’’Mike… you have been acting weird lately. If you are thinking about something then I hope you know you can tell me everything.’’
I fell silent. It left me speechless.
Another minute of silence passed without realizing I didn’t give him an answer.
-’’Have I done something wrong…? - He asked… sad.
-’’What? No— Will, no. You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s… it’s not even about you!’’ – I muttered quickly — too quickly.
The second those last words came out of my mouth, I could feel how wrong they sounded.
Guilt hit me instantly. My throat went dry.
-’’Will, I just— ’’
The words got stuck halfway out. I didn’t know how to finish that sentence without making it worse.
Now he was the one that went quiet.
Seconds later I started to hear quiet sobs — like he was trying to keep them in.
That froze me. I didn’t know what to do.
*Fuck, fuck, fuck!*
I tried to get up from the bed, but all I managed to do was make the mattress creak with every movement.
I felt stupid and decided to stay quiet.
*I shouldn’t have said that. I can’t believe it…*
Suddenly, the sobs started disappearing slowly.
-’’I don’t know. I thought… Agh, nevermind…’’ He said, with his voice hoarse of the crying.
-’’Please, say it.’’ — I answered him quickly. — ‘’Will, I’m… I’m sorry for being an asshole. I mean, I know I have been acting weird lately and you were just trying to knock some sense on me and… I don’t know. I just….’’ And again I didn’t know what to say.
Will sat down on his bed, his eyes still glassy.
-’’I… I didn’t say it. You’re not an asshole for me…’’
-’’You didn’t have to.’’ — I interrupted him. — ‘’Sorry.’’
I stood up and sat down next to him.
-’’I thought you were mad at me. Since… you know. Since you arrived and El got arrested then you started being more distant. Even you started to ignore me.’’ He confessed.
He assumed his usual pose — hands clasped together, looking down.
-’’When I first entered your room and saw that letter for me, I immediately thought that we were feeling the same. I mean, not in a weird way. I just missed you too so much and I also wrote some letters for you that I never got to send.’’
That was the biggest confession I had ever made to anyone.
I usually keep those thoughts to myself.
But with Will, everything was different. Everything felt so easy with him by my side.
Will slowly raised his hand and placed it on my leg, rubbing his fingertip against it.
-’’Do you think you'll ever let me read them?’’ —He asked.
-’’Yes, Will. Of course.’’
He started looking at me as he took his hand off carefully.
-’’Is your arm better now?’’ —He asked with a smile on his face.
-’’Yeh, I mean, I can’t move it but it doesn’t hurt anymore! haha’’.
His smile became very sweet and softer, and his eyes looked at me differently. In a way I'd never seen him look at me before.
It made me nervous.
I don't know why.
He leaned toward me. He made me tense up — so much — so that I felt my arm start to ache again from how hard I was clenching my muscles.
I don't know what I was imagining would happen at that moment, but at least it never did.
He rested his head on my shoulder as a few light tears began to fall from his eyes again.
The tension disappeared from my body and I placed my hand on his head.
-’’Will, are you okay? Have I said something wrong?’’ — I asked him with a soft tone.
-“No… you didn’t. You just said something right.”
Will sniffed quietly, his voice muffled against my shoulder.
-“Sorry… I didn’t mean to cry again.I just get scared sometimes.” —He said slowly.
I frowned slightly.
-“Scared of what?”
And he continued saying:
-“That things change… and people don’t stay the same...”
He looked down again.
-“...and, maybe, one day, you’ll realize you don’t need me anymore.”
I raised my hand and I left it carefully on Will’s head — touching his hair.
I placed my other hand on his face and I slowly whipped a tear from his cheek.
That caught him out of guard — he moved his head out of my shoulder so he could look at me.
-’’I’ll never stop needing you, Will.’’ —I suddenly said.
A surprised expression appeared on his face.
For a moment, neither of us spoke.
The curtains by the window had shifted slightly, and a thin stripe of morning sunlight slipped through the room, landing across Will’s face — soft and golden.
It reminded me of the other day.
When we were riding our bikes and the sunlight had fallen on him the same way.
The light caught on his eyelashes and the curve of his cheek, making his eyes look brighter than usual. He blinked slowly, still staring at me like he was trying to understand what I had just said.
For some reason, I couldn’t look away.
But this time… I didn’t want to.
I wanted Will to notice.
It felt strange — the sunlight, the quiet room, the way he was sitting so close to me.
My chest tightened again.
Not in the same anxious way as before.
Something else.
Something I didn’t quite understand yet.
-’’Mike… did you mean what you said?”