Chapter Text
Asmodeus
"I can't deciiiiide"
"Which outfit should I go for?"
-image-
-image-
-image-
"I want to go somewhere fun tonight"
"Going to get myself a date ;)"
Beelzebub
"The one with strawberries"
Mammon
"Ya just saying that cause it's the only one with food on it"
Yuki
"I like the strawberry one too!"
"It's cute :)"
"I think you should wear it with the hat in the third picture"
Satan
"I doubt 'cute' is the only look Asmo is going for tonight"
Lucifer
"You are not bringing anyone home"
Asmodeus
">:("
"Well I don't need to be here to have fun"
Leviathan
"Ew!"
"Gross!!!"
Belphegor
"Shut up"
"I'm trying to sleep"
Mammon
"Then put it on silent!"
Asmodeus
"Why do I even ask you guys?"
"None of you have fashion sense"
"Except Yuki. I have to agree the hat is the right addition"
Yuki
":D"
"I wish I had your confidence, Asmo"
"I don't know if I could ever wear outfits like that"
"You wear it so well!"
Asmodeus
"Aw thank you Sweetheart"
"But I'm know you'd look adorable in anything"
"What kind of outfits do you wear on dates anyway?"
Mammon
"It's cuter than whatever you wear I bet"
Yuki
"Oh um, well"
"Technically, I've never been on an actual date so"
Asmodeus
"Yuki"
"ARE YOU SERIOUS?!"
Mammon
"NEVER?!"
"EVEN LEVI'S BEEN ON A DATE!!"
Leviathan
"HEY"
"It was tricked to hang out with a normie!"
"And it wasn't a date!"
Beelzebub
"No one ever took you out to eat, Yuki?"
Belphegor
"Huh"
Satan
"You aren't the shy type either, so it is hard to believe"
Lucifer
"What do you mean by technically, Yuki?"
Yuki
"I've tried to"
"I just"
Asmodeus
"Yuki"
"We're going on a date"
Yuki
"What?"
Mammon
"Oh no you don't!"
"I'm taking Yuki out on a date!"
"But just because he hasn't been on one yet!"
"I mean, as his first it's my responsibility"
Satan
"Is that what you're going with, Mammon?"
"I doubt he would enjoy whatever dates you'd plan for him"
"Allow me to take you on a date, Yuki"
Yuki
"Y'all"
Belphegor
"Why even go out anyway?"
Leviathan
"Exactly, I have plenty of manga and video games in my room"
Belphegor
"I was gonna suggest a nap"
Yuki
"Calm down for a second"
Lucifer
"Ignore them, Yuki."
"I'll take you on a proper date."
Mammon
"Not you too!"
Lucifer
"Do you have a problem with that?"
Yuki
"Oh for"
"Y'all please"
Beelzebub
"We should just let Yuki decide"
"We're all willing, so Yuki should get to choose"
Asmodeus
":("
"But..."
Mammon
"Choose me!"
Leviathan
"Like that would ever happen"
Yuki
"Let's just"
"Pretend this conversation never happened"
Belphegor
"What?"
Asmodeus
"Oh Honey, feeling flustered for once?"
Lucifer
"Asmo"
Yuki
"That's enough"
Mammon
"Yeah right, Asmo!"
"Yuki wouldn't go out with you!"
Asmodeus
"And you think you have a chance?"
Satan
"Out of all of us, you have the lowest chance with Yuki"
Leviathan
"Yeah lolol"
Yuki
"I'm not playing this game"
Belphegor
"Game?"
Beelzebub
"You okay, Yuki?"
Yuki
"No"
"I'm done"
"Fuck y'all"
Leviathan
"Yuki?!"
Asmodeus
"Now you've upset him, Mammon!"
"You should've just let me take him out instead of arguing!"
Mammon
"HEY!"
"Don't go blaming me!"
Satan
"Yuki?"
"I'm well aware he doesn't like to see us argue, though he's never reacted like this before"
Beelzebub
"Are you having a bad day, Yuki?"
"Are you hungry?"
Belphegor
"I don't think it's that last one, Beel"
Yuki tosses his D.D.D. onto his mattress and gets up, ignoring the numerous pings that follow. Not now. He just- he can't. He rubs his face and sighs, looking around his room for something else to occupy him. He drops to his knees and feels around under his bed for a box, snatching it once he finds it. He pulls off the top at stares blankly at the small collection of snacks in front of him. No, not in the mood for that, or that, or any of this really. Is Yuki even in the mood to eat right now? More notifications try to grab his attention, but again Yuki ignores them. Maybe he should read something. He stuffs the box back into its hiding place and and ventures over to he table across the room. He pulls out one of the chairs and sits in it as he carefully digs out the book he wants from the pile to his side. He opens it up to where he left off. His eyes follow the lines of text, but his mind refuses to focus and read it. Another notification. Yuki should just start the paragraph over, just try again. Another ping. He groans. Nope, his brain won't let him. He should just silence it. He's trying to avoid it anyway- And there goes his ringtone. He shuts his book and stands.
Yuki is about to silence his D.D.D., but he sees Lucifer's name on the screen. He doesn't want to answer it, but he fears Lucifer may come see him in person if he doesn't. He can't see anyone right now, so he taps the green button and holds it to his ear. "Hey."
"Yuki," Lucifer's voice remains as serious as ever, but there is a hint of worry he's trying to bury. "Are you all right?"
"Yeah. I'm fine, I just-" He sighs. "I'm not in the mood to deal with this kind of thing. At least, not about that subject."
Lucifer remains silent for a moment, contemplating, but then he speaks, "I can forbid them from discussing such topics with you, if you wish. I assume asking about certain personal matters makes you uncomfortable, and I cannot say I blame you."
"Nah, you don't need to do that. I'll be fine, but thank you for looking out for me, Lucifer. I appreciate it. "
-- -- -- --
< It's Yuki's turn to cook, but, having scanned over the kitchen inventory, he may not have all the ingredients he was planning for. Hell, half of what he can find he doesn't think he can eat and live. Scavengers here and there have had their pickings, but at least Beel hasn't cleared out the fridge. Ah, speak of the devil, here comes Beel wandering in.
"It's gonna be an hour and some before dinner is ready." Yuki states bluntly.
"I know, but I'm hungry." Beel's stomach grumbles following his response.
Yuki's tired face softens when he sees Beel's somber expression. "Here. Let me grab you a snack, so you don't eat something I need to use." Beel beams at his words. Yuki has actually been wanting to try something with Beel, and this seems like a good opportunity. He's been able to find the Devildom equivalents to a lot of foods, but it took him way too long to find the equivalent of peanut butter. He swears he's not an idiot. He just didn't have to survive off peanut butter and jelly sandwiches while here, nor did he have dogs to trick into taking their pills. Once he finds the jar, he slides it to Beel and then hunts for a proper spoon in a drawer full of unsorted silverware. Luckily, it doesn't take long before Beel starts shoving spoonfuls into his mouth.
Beel gives a muffled, "Thank you." And then swallows before continuing. "Are you hungry at all? I can share."
"Ah, no thanks, Beel." Yuki smiles at the offer as he pulls out two large pots from the cupboard. "I'm saving room for later, but that's very kind of you."
"Oh, okay." Beel devours another spoonful. "How are you feeling, Yuki?"
Yuki pauses for a moment, the water from the sink continuing to fill the pot he's holding. "I'm fine. Why do you ask?" He shuts off the water when he focuses again.
"You were upset earlier."
Yuki sets the first pot onto the stove and begins to fill the other. "I was, but I've calmed down now."
"So you aren't upset anymore?"
"Not really, no." Yuki turns to face Beel and chuckles as he see Beel licking the spoon clean. "It's times like this you remind me of a little puppy."
Beel's eyes widen slightly and the edges of his cheeks flush with a soft pink. "'Little puppy?'"
"Though I guess you're a big puppy." Yuki flicks the heat on for the water to start boiling.
Beel smiles as he hums around the spoon, having finished off the jar. He jumps a bit when a door slams behind him. Someone enters.
"There ya are, Human!" Mammon shouts, bursting into the kitchen. "What the hell ya up to? Ain't ya usually playing something in the music room?"
"Got cooking duty." Yuki answers as he starts pulling ingredients from the fridge.
"Oh? I'm helping!" Mammon picks up one of the containers.
"'Ey! No you don't!" Yuki whacks his hand. "Mitts off the mushrooms!"
"What?!" Mammon whines. "Why not?"
"Because too many cooks spoil the pot. Now give!" Yuki reaches for the container, but Mammon holds it over his head, making Yuki jump to even get his finger tips to touch it.
"Here I am trying to be nice to ya! And what do I get?" Mammon uses his free hand to push Yuki's face away from him. "Sass from some walking cotton candy!"
The container is pulled out of his grip by Beel, who hands it back to Yuki.
"Thank you." Yuki smiles at Beel, sticks his tongue out at Mammon (who returns the gesture), and sets the container back onto the counter.
"Can I help?" Beel asks.
"Really? Right after I asked?" Mammon frowns. "Ya think he's gonna say yes to ya, huh?"
Yuki stares at the two.
Mammon's hands fly into the air. "Ya can't be serious!"
Sighing, Yuki curses to himself. "Okay, okay, you know what, sure. Mammon, Beel, I got a sauce recipe my dad sent me. Can I trust y'all with it?"
"Of course!" Mammon gleams while Beel nods silently.
"Here lemme just-" Yuki pulls his D.D.D. from his pocket, pulls up a photo, and hands it to Beel. "I edited it a bit with some substitutions that we should have. Shouldn't be too difficult."
Mammon snatches the D.D.D.. "I got this! Beel can just uh- Don't need ya here."
"Yuki handed it to me." Beel objects.
"Can we even trust ya to not eat everything?"
"Y'all!" Yuki crosses his arms, glaring at the two. "There's a reason I want both of you on one task. Y'all mean well but have a tendency to make certain mistakes. Mammon, you watch Beel and make sure he doesn't eat the ingredients. Beel, you watch Mammon and make sure he doesn't add anything not on the recipe."
"Oh, that makes sense." Beel nods.
"I don't need Beel watching me! I'm the older brother here, I'll watch him just fine." Mammon grumbles.
"Mammon," Yuki gives his shoulder a pat. "Like I said, you mean well, but sometimes it doesn't work out how you want."
"What? Ya think I'm stupid?" Mammon pouts.
"No, no. I don't think you're stupid. Just- you don't think before you act sometimes. Intelligence is different than impulsiveness. I mean, who is the first person I go to when I want help with my math homework?"
"Me, of course!" Mammon smirks. "I am the Great Mammon after all. Who wouldn't want my help?"
"Well, O Great Mammon, could you please turn around and keep Beel from drooling and devouring the ingredients."
Mammon whips his head around and curses as he sees Beel bite into a tomato he picked up from the cutting board. "Ey! Beel stop that!"
Yuki chuckles softly and then continues his cooking. He sets a pan a pan on one of the free burners and opens the large container, looks like the meat marinated well. He digs around for another cutting board, dices the soaked meat, and throws it into the pan. Once the water beings to boil, he puts the pasta in, pretending to not be aware of the conversation happening just a couple feet away.
"What's that?" Beel leans over Mammon.
"Wha- Nothing! I got nothing!" Mammon squeaks, trying to hide what's in his hands.
Please let this be a normal dinner.
-- -- -- --
"Mammon, keep Beel from eating everything before everyone else gets here." Yuki sets the last bowl on the dining table.
"Well tell everyone else to hurry up!" Mammon tries to keep Beel from taking the entire bowl.
"Good luck with that." Satan sighs as he walks into the dining room. "Though I am impressed with how much he hasn't devoured yet. I know he can be frustrating to cook with."
Yuki shrugs. "Meh, he isn't that bad. He's a sweetheart and as long as everyone gets a serving I'm happy. After that though you guys can fight over the leftovers."
The rest of the brothers file in and everyone sits in their respective seats. It doesn't take long for the usual chaos to start. Beel steals food from Levi yet again, Asmo is hounding Mammon about his missing perfume, and Belphie and Satan tease Lucifer about his recent outing with Diavalo. Yuki butts into each conversation, giving some of his own food to Levi, telling Mammon to pay Asmo for how much the perfume cost, and somehow convincing Satan and Belphie to leave Lucifer be for the rest of dinner. But, that doesn't mean the chaos stopped.
Asmo leans closer to Yuki, chin resting on his hand. "You know I can't believe it right."
"Pardon?" Yuki turns to him, finishing what he was chewing.
"The fact you've never been on a date, Darling." Asmo pouts. "You're so cute, almost as cute as me. It can't be possible."
Sudden laughter erupts from Yuki, and everyone else at the table turns silent at his sudden outburst. When he notices everyone staring at him, he coughs into his hand, quieting himself down. "Sorry, I just- Asmo said something funny."
"Of course his jokes land." Levi grumbles inaudibly.
Mammon frowns. "What the hell ya joking about, Asmo?"
The concern on Asmo's face grows. "I wasn't making a joke."
Satan shares that concern. "Yuki, I heard what Asmo said. How was that funny?"
Yuki chuckles softly. "I mean, it's pretty obvious. You don't have to play dumb for my sake."
"Wait. What's going on?" Belphie mutters, groggy as he rubs his eye. Beel shrugs in response.
"Yeah. What are ya even talkin' about?" Mammon groans.
Satan sighs. "The fact Yuki has never been on a date."
"Not like it's a big deal." Levi mumbles.
"Oh Darling." Asmo rests his hand on Yuki's shoulder. "You know you can share anything with us."
Yuki raises an eyebrow. "I- What is there to even share?"
"Do not make Yuki uncomfortable." Lucifer glares at Asmo.
"I'm just offering a shoulder to cry on." Asmo's pout turns into a flirtatious smirk. "And well, anything else he may need."
"Ey! Oh no you don't!" Mammon growls at his brother.
"Okay. Okay! Just-" Yuki puts his hands up. "Mammon, calm down. Asmo, Satan, I am perfectly fine and I have no idea why you're so worried."
"I'm not surprised." Belphie shrugs. "Yuki's never shown any interest."
Beel hums in agreement.
"But this is Yuki!" Asmo whines. "He's such a sweetheart! It doesn't make any sense!"
Satan rubs his chin. "To think, our Yuki has never been on a date, and I doubt he has ever kissed anyone."
"Oh nah, I've kissed someone before." Yuki states bluntly. The brothers all stare at him, but Yuki pays them no mind as he stabs another piece of food with his fork and brings it to his mouth.
"Wait, what!?" Mammon shrieks and then tries playing it off as if he didn't. "I uh- Not like I care or anything, but I- Well, you're such a nerd, so it's hard to believe."
"Very charming, Mammon." Satan groans.
"Lol tsundere." Levi giggles and Mammon grumbles at him in response.
"Oh Yuki!" Asmo squeals a bit. "You have to tell me!"
"Do not feel like you must tell everyone. You owe them nothing, Yuki." Lucifer takes a sip from his drink.
Belphie chuckles. "We all know you want to hear it too."
"I think we all want to." Beel says.
Yuki rests his chin on his free hand. "Well, when I was younger, this girl sat next to me in class. It was my last year of elementary I think, I was like nine or ten. I'd help her with homework a lot after school; I thought we had something. The school year was about to end, she was going to move away, and by then I had a bit of a crush on her. We only had a couple weeks left, so I went fuck it and kissed her before she went home one day."
"And she rejected you?" Asmo frowns.
"Ha! More than that. She decked me in the face!" Yuki laughs loudly. "And she said something like, 'That was my first kiss you dyke!' Mind you this was before I transitioned. She was furious with me, made me promise to not tell anyone or ever talk to her again because her family would kill the both of us if I did. Told my dad I got hit in the face by a stray ball after school when he picked me up. My shirt was fucking ruined with blood, but eh, I should've expected it." Yuki has to cover his mouth to muffle his giggles while the brothers stare at him, their eyes wide.
"She punched you." Satan's fork bends in his grip.
Levi's eyebrows furrow. "She made you bleed."
"Why the hell would she do that!?" Mammon growls.
"I deserved it." Yuki shrugs. "I just kissed her out of the blue, no warning."
Asmo is the next to speak out. "She didn't have to call you such an awful thing!"
"Wasn't the first time, wasn't the last." Yuki scoffs. "At least when I transitioned, 'dyke' changed to 'faggot.'"
Beel turns to Belphie. "Those are insults?"
Belphie nods. "Yeah, don't repeat them."
"Was this common for you, Yuki?" Lucifer asks, keeping his appearance calm.
"Kinda. The names were common, but-" Yuki's face falters for a moment as he finally looks up to see how everyone is staring at him, but he quickly replaces it with a smile that doesn't reach his eyes. "Well, I've just bummed y'all out, haven't I? Sorry, I just- Sometimes I forget that... Never mind. Sorry, I didn't mean to bring down the mood."
"Hey! Don't apologize for that! I want-" Mammon cuts himself off as his cheeks flush. "I mean, I- I'm stuck with you anyway, so no keeping secrets."
"Do you ever hear yourself, Mammon?" Satan groans. "Now isn't the time for this."
"We're friends, right Yuki?" Levi asks. "Why haven't you said anything before?"
"Why the hell would I?" Yuki snaps, immediately regretting it. "Sorry, I- We should change the subject."
"You can talk to us, Yuki." Beel says.
Belphie agrees. "Yeah, you've dealt with our baggage. It's only fair."
"Yuki-" Lucifer cuts himself off as Yuki stands suddenly.
"I'm done eating." Yuki picks up his plate and hands it to Beel as he walks past.
"You-" Beel takes the plate and looks up at Yuki. "You don't want more?"
"I'm full." And with that, Yuki leaves.