OmniscientDirt
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Shanks practices pick-up lines on the mirror to (hopefully) ask Buggy out on a date.
Bookmarked by OmniscientDirt
01 May 2026
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i came here to get some dopamine (make it go all night, no gasoline) by EroticOmens
Fandoms: Deadpool (Movieverse)
18 Apr 2025
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A volatile and deeply depressed but still horny Wade’s been trying to get into Colossus’ pants…well, basically since the big guy dragged him home in a duffel bag. He wasn’t expecting it to ever work, but sometimes, God smiles upon even the most disgusting of creatures.
___
“Excuse me?” Wade opens his legs so he can see the other man.
He looks absolutely miserable, full of remorse as one could possibly be while maintaining an erection literally as solid as a steel beam. “I, ah…It won’t fit,” he mutters.
Colossus hasn’t been able to get his freak all the way on. That just fucking sucks. There’s only one person suited to right this wrong, and his name rhymes with Slade.
“Luckily for you,” Wade says with a wink and a grin, “I’m not like other girls. It’ll fit, pookie. We’ll make it fit.”Bookmarked by OmniscientDirt
31 Jan 2026
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Nandor is a vampire who’s been the pet (good for hunting and, well, sometimes other things) of a family of slayers for 170 years. Guillermo’s the talented but lonely slayer who ends up with Nandor when Nandor’s master decides he doesn’t want him anymore. There are some ups and downs.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 118,377
- Chapters:
- 17/17
- Comments:
- 631
- Kudos:
- 1,022
- Bookmarks:
- 172
- Hits:
- 21,085
Bookmarked by OmniscientDirt
26 Jul 2025
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The Moon, The Wolf, And The Languages Of Love by 221blackandwhitestripes
Fandoms: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
15 Jan 2023
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Nandor’s been having nightmares almost every day since their trip to the casino. At this point, he just wants them to stop. He’s willing to try anything. (The fact that his nightmares are about Guillermo means absolutely nothing.)
AKA: A study in the depths of Nandor’s denial, Guillermo getting what he wants and how sometimes miscommunication can actually be a good thing.
(Set after 3x04 The Casino, Canon-Divergent after 3x06 The Escape)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 87,591
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Comments:
- 343
- Kudos:
- 578
- Bookmarks:
- 130
- Hits:
- 11,177
Bookmarked by OmniscientDirt
16 Jul 2025
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Living in an Age That Calls Darkness Light by holograms
Fandoms: What We Do in the Shadows (TV)
22 Oct 2021
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Summary
His friends want to help him, but the only problem is them. Friends don't lock friends into cages and offer only icky blood to eat. He is fine. Everything is alright!
(Nandor is not alright.)
Bookmarked by OmniscientDirt
11 Jul 2025