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A beeping sound seeps into Michael’s subconcious. It’s loud and eerie, like a racing heartbeat, a monitor. It makes him restless in his sleep.
He’s barely been able to stay still - the awkward bedside chair might be part of the problem, an added problem on top of stress - and when he has managed drift off into sleep, his dreams have been even less great, with visions of dust storms and fractals haunting him until they shook him awake again. Being conscious wasn’t much better though at the moment. Each time Michael’s eyes opened to the florescent lights, a pounding headache had rocked him, one that even copious amounts of acetone couldn’t shake. He had mentally rattled the side table and nearly tipped his chair over a few times when his nervous energy had spiked. And then there was the reminder, the worst part about being here, the figure clothed in a hospital gown that lay still in the bed next to him. The figure was pale and there were still scars on his neck and it was his fault, all Michael’s fault. Alex.
It should make Michael feel more than just grief, to be this close to him. There’s a cocktail of pain and longing and overwhelming lust that usually comes with Alex’s presence, a feeling that has sat deep in his bones since he was 17. In recent memory, this cocktail has shifted to include a familial warmth, a safety that he didn’t think would ever find with anyone, let alone the man that had been thrown back into his life after a decade of being gone. When Michael holds Alex’s hand, an energy runs through his veins. It’s a ray of adrenaline, a steady anchor, a cosmic force. But now? When his lover’s hand can’t hold him back? All he gets is a wave of pure grief, one that Michael isn’t ready to feel. Not yet.
Even through his thoughts of Alex, the mechanical beeping is still permeating Michael’s mind, frantic and unwelcoming. As he sleeps, the sound is accompanied by a flurry of memories from the day of the fight, playing on a loop like a broken record. He sees Dallas, arm outstretched, magically moving the fuel along the shimmering surface of Michael’s console. Clyde, up against the portal, burning to ash. Kyle, rushing onto the scene. And Alex, shivering under his blanket, being lifted into Kyle’s arms and driven away before Michael can tell him it’ll all be okay. Michael wants to cry at the thought. And then, he is, waking from the memory and blinking open his eyes, watching as the room come into a blurry, tear-filled view.
A weak, familiar voice echoes in the room, making Michael’s heart skip.
“Morning, cowboy.”
Michael hurriedly wipes the tears away. Alex is awake.
He still looks pale, but his eyes are focused, looking at Michael with a fond but tired smile. It seems he must have just woken up, too - his hair is still swept back from his forehead where Michael moved it a few hours ago, and he’s shifting around slightly like each limb is slowly coming back to life. Michael is standing from his chair before his own body can shake off his sleep, and his legs nearly buckle, making him collapse on top of Alex rather than reaching out to hold him close like he intended. Alex grunts at the sudden weight on him, but doesn’t pull away.
“Michael. You’re okay.” Alex sounds like he can’t tell if he’d rather laugh or cry.
“I’m okay? You’re the one who tumbled into the poison-filled alien dimension, and you’re asking me if I’m okay.” Michael shifts against the railing of the bed, sitting up so he can see Alex’s face. He puts on a teasing smile. “Well, physically, I am. Sure. But emotionally?” Micheal lets out a long, dramatic breath, putting a hand to his chest. “‘You sure know how to break a man’s heart.”
That gets a chuckle from Alex, but it slowly melts as he begins to take in the rest of the space, looking past Michael and around the sterile, clinical room. There are no windows, and very little color besides the wood paneling on the far wall. The monitor besides him beeps steadily now, connected to a pulse oximeter on his right hand. His left is tucked under the sheets, and he pulls it free to feel around; first to his leg, or lack thereof, as his prosthetic is leaning against the opposite wall, and then up to his neck, where the dark, fractal-like lines are still scarred into his skin. There are a few other patches of scars that appeared in the pocket world as well, creeping onto his upper chest, where Michael can see above the gown. A layer of shiny sweat still clings to his forehead, a sign of a lingering fever, and his eyes are ringed red with the burning threat of fatigue. Alex may be out of the dimension that can hurt him, but his unwanted trip still had some chronic effects.
“Hey. Are you cold? I brought your jacket, your beanie -”
Alex shakes his head. “No, no. That’s not it. Just… how long has it been?”
Michael reaches to grab Alex’s hand, pulling it away from the scars on his neck. “A little over two days. Probably closer to three, actually. You really got me scared there, Alex.”
Alex goes to sit up further, but grimaces and decides against it. “This… this is Deep Sky. I’ve been in this room. Is Kyle -”
“Kyle’s here. He’s been taking care of you. It would’ve been hard to explain your situation over at Roswell Community Medical.”
Alex looks around the room again as he thinks of another question. “Everyone else who was there. Liz, and Maria. How are they?”
“Everyone’s okay. Still shaking it all off, but they’re good. They’re safe.”
“Thank god.”
There’s a short silence. Michael’s grip moves to the blanket, and he begins to curl the fabric up in his fist, still restless. The bedside table threatens to shake again from his telekenesis. He’s not doing this reunion right.
“Whatever you want to say, just say it.” Of course Alex knows that fidgety feeling Michael gets, right before he says something he’s hesitant to share.
Michael just nods and starts to look away, but Alex moves to to hold Michael’s chin, drawing their eyes back together, and Michael caves. “Kyle said there were still effects. Of the radiation. That with the amount of time you spent in Theo’s dimension, it might take a long time to recover.”
“Michael, I could have guessed that as soon as I knew about the atmosphere there.”
“That’s beside the point.” Michael pulls away, not by far, but noticeably so. He scrubs his hands over his face and then pulls off his handana, tossing it aside. “Look, it’s basically like you were exposed to a nuclear power plant. It’s only been a few days, but some symptoms show up later. Like skin damage, or worse, your bone marrow could’ve been affected, and that’s -”
Alex interrupts with a groan. “Next time I need to tell Kyle not to start with the doctor speak until after I’m awake.” Instead of lightening the mood though, like it seems was Alex’s intention, Michael’s eyes go wide.
“How about there not be a next time!”
Another silence. Alex softens. “Okay. Of course.” He reaches for Michael’s hand again, but Michael doesn’t take it. There’s one more thing he has to be sure of.
“What if it hurts you?”
“What?”
Michael’s eyes are threatening to fill with tears again, and a twinge of pain curls in his chest. “If you start to show signs of burns, or if those scars still hurt to touch like before. I don’t want to get in the way of you healing. Not when it’s something where we can’t predict what will happen.” There’s an unspoken I’m sorry in there too, one that Michael doesn’t say, but Alex probably hears anyways. “What if I’m making it worse by just being here?”
“That doesn’t make any sense.”
“None of this does! I’m an alien, in case you forgot.”
“We’re back on Earth. I’m not in imminent danger of radiation anymore.”
“This is a brand-new, pocket-dimensional, extra alien-y branch of science that no other human has experienced. Even Max couldn’t heal it away. We still can’t know how you’ll handle all of this.”
“Just shut up and kiss me, Guerin. That I can handle.”
It’s an order, not a suggestion. Alex needs this. Michael slowly moves back down onto the bed - he hadn’t even noticed that he’d stood up in his frustration until he has to sit down again. Alex lets him take his own time, waiting for the panic to subside, waiting until Michael can close the distance between them on his own. Michael needs to know for himself that Alex can survive it. It takes another confirmation - a whispered are you sure? against Alex’s lips that is met with a nod - before they meet in a way that is long overdue, Michael soft and hesitant; Alex craning his neck forwards the best he can, pulling his good leg up to hug Michael's side, wanting as much of him as he can handle. Yes. Yes, I’m sure.
They break apart, then collide again, and a heat builds up quicker than either man expects. It’s a result of relief, of survival. Careful to avoid the fractal scars, Michael puts a hand to Alex’s cheek before he can decide against it, letting his warmth sink into cold skin. There’s a strike of fear that hits him when he can tell Alex is still clammy to the touch, but it’s quickly replaced by the feeling of Alex’s hands in his hair, pulse oximeter tugging gently against his curls, and Michael is lost in the sensation. He shifts to sit fully on Alex’s thighs, letting himself be held.
“I probably taste terrible right now.”
“I don’t fucking care. Come here.”
It doesn’t seem to matter where they are - each time they kiss, it’s overwhelming, in a crashing, magnetic fashion where nothing else matters. Alex can run his fingers along Michael’s belt, Michael can tease his teeth around Alex’s lower lip, and it’s familiar, a pattern of parting and reuniting, a constant throughline in their time together. Even here, in the depths of a secret laboratory, they haven’t lost sight of home.
“I wonder if the monitor is acting up again, I’m getting an alert that Alex’s heart rate is a little high -” A familiar voice floats by, abruptly pausing as soon as the door swings open. Kyle is standing there, clipboard in hand, mouth hanging open. “Woah. Sorry.”
Michael regains his composure first, sliding off of Alex’s lap to stare at their friend with a smirk. “Morning, Valenti. I think your patient is awake.”
Kyle walks in the room just enough to shut the door behind him. “I can’t say I would recommend a makeout session in his treatment plan, but I am glad to see him conscious. And to see you without a headache.” He looks pointedly at Michael. “My emergency stash of nail polish remover is just about empty.”
Alex leans back, readjusting his gown to make sure it’s still tied properly. There’s a hint of a blush spreading on his face, contrasting starkly with his pale coloring moments prior. “It’s good to see you, Kyle.”
“There’s someone else here who wants to see you both, too, before I reiterate my whole medical spiel again.” On cue the door opens again, revealing Maria, sporting a handbag in one hand and a small bouquet of wildflowers in the other. Another wave of relief hits Michael. He hasn’t seen her since the fight at the portal.
“Sorry, I couldn’t help but listen in.” There are noticeable purple circles under her eyes, but she’s smiling. “I was going to drop these off anyways -” She gestures to the flowers. “- so great timing on your part, Alex. Welcome back to the land of the living.” Maria strides past Kyle in the doorway, and in seconds she has pulled Alex into a hug, depositing the flowers at the foot of the bed.
Alex leans into Maria’s embrace as best he can. “Thanks for getting my message. I’d still be stuck down there if not for your excellent sleuthing skills.”
“Anytime. You call, and I’ll answer. Even if the call is from another dimension.” She brings their foreheads together, taking a moment to hold him, and then pulls back to tuck a strand of hair away from his eyes and kiss his cheek. “I’m just glad everyone made it out of there in time.”
“No kiss for me, DeLuca?”
“As long as your man doesn’t mind.” Maria teases, but leans in to kiss Michael’s cheek anyways. “How’re you holding up?”
“Running on empty, and by empty I mean 3 hours of sleep, acetone, and tequila. But right now, though, not too bad.” He smiles over at Alex.
“I can run food from the Crashdown up here, if you’d like. Something tells me it’s been days since you ate a real meal. But first, I have something else that you should have.” Maria starts to rummage through her bag, and finally produces a small jewelry pouch, which she slips into Michael’s hand. He knows instantly what is inside it by the way the glass pendant around his neck twitches. “Once Theo’s dimension collapsed, the sinkhole just became normal sand, and I was able to recover it.”
For a moment, Michael just stares at the pouch before he can manage to say anything. It’s a reminder of the events that have happened, but it’s also, somehow, back here in his hands. Just like Alex is. “That’s… thank you.”
“Of course. Let me know if there’s anything else the two of you need.” Maria circles around the bed to reach the door again, giving everyone in the room another quick hug as she passes them. When she reaches Kyle, Maria pauses to as though to whisper in his ear, although she doesn’t keep her voice low. “And make sure to update me about how things go with Isobel. That certainly looked like more than just a good-bye kiss.” There’s a dramatic raise of her eyebrows, a final wave, and then Maria’s gone as quick as she came. Kyle closes the door again, seemingly stunned.
“So… there’s a thing with Isobel now.” Michael drawls. Kyle turns and is met with matching looks of amusement from Michael and Alex, both clearly wanting to know more about Maria’s gossip.
“No! I mean, yes. But that’s not my main focus right now.” Kyle steps towards the chair Michael vacated earlier, scoots it closer to the bed, and sits down, clipboard still in his hands. “Right now I just want to make sure you’re healing up okay.” He nods at Alex, then at Michael. Now that Alex is conscious enough to hold a conversation, it’s time to fill him in. Alex clearly doesn’t want to be alone in this moment; he gestures at Michael to move closer. Michael quickly slides the jewelry pouch from Maria into his pocket and clambers onto the bed once more, making sure Alex is comfortably situated against his side before looking back over at Kyle.
“Well, Valenti. Do you want to explain it, or should I?”
Kyle lifts his clipboard. “I’ve got the sheet with all the big fancy words, and the credentials to say them.” He shoots a knowing look at Michael as if to say nice try, before turning to Alex. “Feeling awake enough to do this?”
Alex nods. The red rings around his eyes are a little less prominent now that he’s awake, and although he still is likely running a slight fever, his temperature is feeling much more regulated to Michael’s touch. “No time like the present, I suppose.”
“Alright. Then we’ll start with the official diagnosis.” Kyle takes the top sheet of paper off of his clipboard and passes it over to Alex, who holds it up so both him and Michael can read it. On the paper is a typed clinical summary - Alexander Manes printed at the top, followed by his height, weight, temperature, and blood pressure taken from that morning. Underneath, a list of tests that Kyle had run, and under that, a row labeled Conditions (New), with three bullet points listed:
Acute Radiation Syndrome (ARS)
Cutaneous Radiation Injuries (CRI)
Excessive Fatigue
“Of course, I don’t have an official name for the aftereffects of a radioactive alien dimension, but this is pretty close. You’re following all the typical patterns of Acute Radiation Syndrome.”
Alex looks at Kyle, concern seeping into his voice. “Like Polonium’s effect. I’ve heard of it. Flint had to do some trainings on preventative measures against ARS, in case his department ever worked with nuclear weapons.”
“Then you probably already know that it gets worse before it gets better.” At this, Michael looks away. Kyle had told this to Michael before, and he didn’t take the news as well the first time. “There’s a latent stage in between the other two symptomatic ones. The first stage, it seems you’re beginning to pass. Initial exposure, nausea, climbing fevers, dehydration. Now that we’ve got some rest and some fluid in you, and you’re away from the immediate contaminant, you’ll have some time where you’ll be asymptomatic. That’s stage two. The third stage comes from a delayed reaction to the radiation in your cells, almost like it was dormant for a while.”
“So he’ll be back to how he was before.” Michael’s voice is low. He’s fighting back the urge to stand up in frustration again, but knowing the air in the room deserves to be calm for Alex, he resists. Alex squeezes his hand knowingly, part comfort, part warning.
“In a sense, yes. But here, we can monitor him, make sure his dehydration is controlled, and catch any potential signs of hair loss or impact to your bone marrow before they get seriously impacted.” He turns to Alex. “Even though this all sounds grim, I do have some good news. I’m working with Liz and she thinks there’s a way to utilize some of her regenerative cell research towards preventing the progression of your symptoms. That is, if you don’t mind me sending a blood sample of yours to her so she can see if it’s compatible with her theory.”
“Of course.” Alex nods. “If I trust anyone to work up a science miracle, it’s Liz.”
Kyle smiles. “I’ll let her know. Her hypothesis is that if she can get the right compound to keep your cells, especially those in your blood, from spreading infection, then we can rule out all the most dangerous threats to your health. Sepsis, seizure, cardiovascular impact. Not that those are certain by any means, but we’d like to take preventative measures anyways. Rather stay on the safe side, and give you a better shot of making it through without any lasting damage.”
Alex says “Thank you” at the same moment Michael asks, “And the CRI diagnosis? Alex should hear about that too.”
Kyle leans back in the chair. “Of course. CRI refers specifically to the impact of radiation in the skin. With the radiation dose you had, we can expect some irritation, and possibly some burns on places you had more exposed, like your face and hands. Those shouldn’t set in until the third stage, though, and if you’re lucky, will eventually heal up like they were never there.”
“Is it safe to…” Michael holds up his hand, fingers still intertwined with Alex’s. His voice is still low, but the bubbling anger is fading, replaced with an uncharacteristic shyness that makes Kyle pause before responding.
“Right now, yes. Of course. It’s all currently in the cells under the skin. It’s hard to tell what it will look like in a few days, but you might need some anti-inflammatories and consistent wound dressing to prevent lasting damage. But until any itchiness or redness occurs, we can’t know for sure what the scale of the CRI will be. You can proceed as normal until then.” Kyle motions at his neck. “As for the dark scars, those are… unfamiliar to me.”
“Those are an alien thing. I recognize it from the times Max set off anything electrical, and he’d leave similar fractal marks. Or when Jones put Maria in that coma, he left these too.”
“Did Max ever say anything else about them?”
Michael shakes his head. “Not that he ever told me. But I can ask again.”
“That could be useful. I’d like to know if there’s any other symptoms I should watch out for.”
“I’ll let you know, too, if anything gets worse.”
“Thanks, Alex. You know, Michael filled me in with everything that happened to you before you got back, and it’s a wonder you made it out when you did.” Kyle leans over and puts his clipboard aside. “The radiation dose you absorbed was high, and if you’d been in the dimension a day longer, this would be a terminal diagnosis. You got really lucky, Alex.”
“Not luck.” It could be from the fatigue, but Michael could have sworn that Alex’s eyes got slightly teary again. He grips Michael’s hand with as much strength as he has. “I had him.”
Kyle’s expression is soft, and it takes him a moment to swallow down his own emotion, too. “I’m glad. I’m glad you’re back home, both of you.”
“Us too.”
There’s a long moment in which the room is quiet, before Kyle goes to stand. “I’ll give you guys some time.” He gently claps a hand on Michael’s shoulder as he gets up.
“Wait.” Alex says. “Can Michael stay the night?”
“Technically, only registered family can stay overnight, but I’ve been ignoring that.” Kyle moves about the room now while he talks, shifting the chair back against the wall, moving Maria’s flowers to the bedside table. When he reaches the door, he pauses and looks back at the couple. “After all, I was told something about a wedding happening?”
Michael bites back a smile at the thought, and when he turns to Alex, there is a similar expression on his face. Michael speaks up first. “Don’t worry, Valenti. You’re obviously invited.”
“I can’t wait.” Then, as he walks out, “Congrats, you too. Get some rest.” Kyle shuts the door behind him, and just like that, Michael and Alex are alone again.
“You okay?” Michael turns to look at Alex as soon as the door closes.
“Well, I’m pretty sore. Tired. My leg is killing me, and my head is still a little fuzzy. But it’s nothing I can’t handle.”
“Are you sure?” He’s scanning Alex’s face, like a blister or bruise is going to pop up at any second, hovering his hands near Alex’s chest but not touching him.
“Michael, we are not doing this again. I don’t want you to be scared of me like this.” Alex takes Michael’s hands in his own, guiding them to his chest. He leans back against the pillows, still holding Michael so he doesn’t move away. After a moment, Michael gives in to the touch and lies down next to Alex, leaned up against his side. “I want you to be here with me.”
“I’m still allowed to worry about you. That’s how we got into this mess in the first place, because I didn’t worry enough.”
“You’re forgetting I also had a very inconvenient weather balloon alibi.”
“Still, how horrible of a boyfriend does that make me, by not realizing you were missing?”
Alex opens his mouth to say something smart back, but the remark seemingly dies on his tongue as something else occurs to him. He puts on a face of mock surprise. “Boyfriend, hmm? And here I thought we were engaged.”
Now it’s Michael’s turn to pause. “I know. It just feels… strange. I wasn’t sure if you still wanted that, or if it was just the fever talking. And I get it, if you were desperate to propose because you were literally dying, but I also understand if you need -”
“Don’t you dare say I need to rethink, Guerin. I was thinking more clearly than I have in a long time.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. I did mean it. I really do want to marry you.” Both men are now on their sides so they can face each other better, sharing the space on the bed best they can. Michael kicks off his boots so he can draw his legs in closer, hooking both his feet around Alex’s ankle. Alex chuckles at the familiarity. “I’ve got to get through this first, but as soon as I’m recovered enough to dip you on the dance floor, we are making this wedding happen.”
Michael smiles, allowing himself to drink in the wonderful, whirlwind feeling that Alex’s words bring. It only lasts a moment though before another feeling creeps in, a dark and doubtful gnawing at his chest. “Alex,” he says, moving a hand up to his partner’s jaw, idly brushing his knuckles against the stubble there. “I need to say something, and I need you to not stop me until it’s all out and said, yeah?”
Alex looks unsure. “Yeah, okay.”
“I still want to marry you! It’s not that. Don’t worry.” Michael reassures him. “It’s from before. When we were still down there, in Theo’s dimension. I broke my promise.” He pauses to take in a deep breath, something to stop himself from shaking. “I said I’d never look away, and yet, I left you. I walked off in that barn, away from where we were supposed to be married, in front of Dallas. And I feel horrible for it. I was so sure we’d get you out, that there would be more fuel for the console, and sure, we did get fuel, but for a bit there it nearly all went to shit instead. Then it would’ve been my fault that you didn’t get your dying wish. Do you… do you remember any of that?” Michael has both his hands on either side of Alex’s face now, needing his words to be heard. Needing Alex to understand just how sorry he is.
“I remember.”
Michael nearly stumbles on the words as he continues, letting out a sound that is laced with pain at the recollection, as well as disbelief that he can even say any of this to Alex at all. Alex is here. He reminds himself. He’s alive and he’s here. “I went off-mission, Alex. I was reckless and stupid, and I can’t regret it now, but I know it’ll haunt me still. The thought that if you hadn’t woken up, I would’ve fucked up the last good thing we had together.” Tears are spilling over again. Michael hates it, getting this emotional, but how can he not? Alex had looked him in the eye and told him the truth, ready to be with him fully on his last day, and Michael had panicked. There was no future without Alex, no way to be okay without him. Their orbit would’ve be out of balance, and Michael would’ve been thrown out into space, alone and silent and devastated. He has a gut feeling not even Max or Isobel would have been able to pull him back.
Alex reaches for Michael’s shoulders, and Michael is instantly thankful for the distraction from his spiral. He’d been in this room for days, thinking of nothing but the ways he’d let Alex down. He’d alternated between shaking with sobs, and drinking so he wouldn’t feel the heartbreak. Now, though, he could let his fear go, at least for a little while. They have more time. “Michael, I’m not mad at you. All I feel is grateful.”
It’s exactly what Michael needs to hear. Still, Alex must know that. “Come on. You’ve got to be at least a little pissed at me. I deserve it.”
“Okay, maybe I was. But now all I feel is alive. Here. Back on Earth. With you.” Alex accentuates each phrase by leaning in for a quick kiss, first on Michael’s cheek, then on his nose, his jaw, and his chin. When he leans in to aim for Michael’s mouth, Michael beats him to it, catching Alex with his lips parted and his breathing stilled. It’s quick, but it brings Michael’s senses back to life, back into focus of what is real. Michael raises his eyebrows in question when he moves in again, and Alex nods. I’m sure.
If not for Alex needing rest to get better, Michael thinks he could hold on to his boyfriend - no, his fiancé - forever, just like this, still exhilarated by his kiss just as much as their very first. They’re more gentle this time, but no less full of love - Michael moves his grip to Alex’s waist, where he knows the fractals haven’t spread, and slowly runs a hand through the gap in the back of Alex’s hospital gown, pulling them closer together; meanwhile Alex has Michael’s face in his hands, and one instinctively moves up into his curls, as it somehow always does. Their lips press lazily together, savoring the taste, welcoming the warmth.
In a brief moment with open eyes, Michael gets a glance at the bed railing across from him, and gets an idea. As smoothly as possible, while keeping his mouth glued to Alex’s, he reaches over and presses one of the small buttons inlaid in the plastic, and the top of the bed starts to lean back like a recliner, stopping once it lays completely flat. Alex pulls back as the bed under them shifts, giving Michael a knowing smile.
“This is like…”
“Yeah. Feels like we’re laying in the back of my pickup truck again.” Michael smiles. “I figured, it would be nice to put a more positive spin on it. One where you didn’t just drop the whole I’m dying bombshell, or one where my hand hadn’t recently been crushed.”
Alex rolls his eyes. “You’re ridiculous, Michael Guerin.”
“And yet,” Michael lightly jabs a finger into Alex’s chest, “you’re still smiling.” He reaches for Alex’s waist again, holding him and guiding him back down onto his side, so they can lie down and resume facing each other. However, when Alex’s shoulder lands, he winces, and Michael gets an odd flash of déjà-vu.
“It’s not you, it’s just -” Alex rubs a hand from his neck down across his collarbone. “The scarring. And everything’s stiff. I just landed funny, that’s all.”
It could just be an odd landing, but it’s also a grim reminder of what Kyle said about the three stages. Michael sighs. “I don’t want you to get worse.” It comes out too blunt, but luckily, Alex is used to that coming from Michael.
“It doesn’t sound like something we can stop.”
“I know. I can recognize it and still not want it, though.”
“It’s better than what my fate was, in Theo’s dimension.” Michael isn’t sure when his hands went back to holding Alex’s, but he begins to run his thumb over Alex’s knuckles as he speaks, soothing away the fear in the memory. It’s for both Alex’s benefit and his own, staying grounded, as he remembers that moment all too well, when Alex had said aloud: I think I’m dying. “I thought I’d made peace with it, so when you found me, all I wanted was a moment with you. To celebrate instead of wallowing, to die happy. But it still hurt. And knowing I’d be leaving you, I -” Alex meets Michael’s eyes. “Oh, god, Michael. I’m sorry I put you through all that.”
“We’re on equal apology grounds now. It’s okay.”
“It’s not.” Alex answers softly. “If you’d been as resigned to my fate as I was, I would have died there. So what I’m trying to say, is thank you. It’s not the first time you’ve saved my life, but I’m glad you fought with me on this one. I’m certainly not ready to leave you just yet.”
“Oh, yeah. Agreed. Watching you die is a hard pass in my book.” Michael plants a quick kiss on Alex’s forehead. His temperature is even better now, seemingly shaken off the fever. “After all, we’ve still got a wedding to plan.”
Alex groans, but it’s playful. “Please, not too many details. I don’t think I can handle anything more than a small ceremony and some drinks afterwards at the Pony.”
“Hey, that sounds perfect to me. As long as we don’t plan anything too late.” Michael’s face twists into a grin, and before he can stop himself, he runs his gaze shamelessly down Alex’s body. He can’t see anything through the shapeless gown, but still. His mind can easily imagine.
Alex laughs in response, and the sound is beautiful. “The evening is just for us. Noted.”
“While we’re on the topic, there’s actually one more thing I wanted to ask.” Michael says, as calmly as he can.
Alex raises an eyebrow. “The topic? Don’t forget we’re technically in my workplace, Guerin.” It’s a fair point, and Michael could tease Alex further about it, but he wants just one more thing before their conversation could potentially turn somber again. One more thing that just recently occurred to him, and now, seems like the most important mission in the world.
“Okay, okay. I know you already beat me to the punch, but still. I wasn’t planning to do this, but then Maria dropped it off, and I realized - I want my chance to say it.”
“Maria dropped… wait, what?”
Instead of reaching for the table, Michael simply holds a hand aloft. With a pinching motion in the air, the jewelry pouch rises, and as Michael moves to open his hand, splaying his fingers wide, the pouch zips through the air into his waiting grip. The moment he pulls out the match to his own glass necklace is the same moment that everything clicks for Alex, and his mouth drops open. He goes to sit up, and Michael follows suit, holding out the necklace between them.
“Michael. You aren’t about to - while I’m still -”
“Let me be sentimental for a minute!” Michael laughs. “You chose a creepy alternate dimension for your moment. I can do mine wherever I damn well want to.”
Alex smiles. Micheal knows what he’s saying with that look: Go on.
“Okay, so I’ll admit, I didn’t really have a speech prepared.” Michael continues. "But I do remember what I was thinking when I made these for us. Most of the alien glass has a purpose, right? Like it all comes together to form something, like the console, or the sword Iz built.”
“Yeah.”
“I’ve held on to this glass so long, but I never figured out what these two pieces went to. But I just was sitting there, and the pieces just started sliding closer to each other on my workbench, and the idea hit me of what they could be used for. Maybe it was because I was thinking about you, too, and how I’d get through weeks without you, but these were suddenly the only thing I could envision those pieces being. Something to give us some peace of mind.” Michael pauses, gathering his thoughts. “I guess what I’m trying to say, is that I never second-guessed any of it. When I told you that I trust you with my secrets, I meant it. You are literally carrying around a fragment of my home, organic matter from my planet, and right now I don’t care what it technically is a piece of. I don’t think I ever need to know. Right now, these pieces are ours, and they feel special, somehow. It’s another reminder. That you’re my home.” His voice wavers a little at the end, but he keeps his eyes on Alex. When his fiancé’s expression stays frozen, Michael raises an eyebrow. “Well?”
Alex tries to hold back a snort of laughter, but fails. “I think you forgot something in there, Guerin.”
“Shit.” With the necklace still looped around his fingers, Michael gathers Alex’s hands in his. He takes a dramatic breath. “Well then. Alexander Manes.” The exaggeration on his name makes Alex smile like Michael knew it would. “Will you make me happiest alien in all of Roswell, and marry me?”
There’s no hesitation. “God, yes.”
Michael holds up the necklace again, and Alex tips his head forward, letting the it be placed back on him. Once the clasp is fastened, Michael runs a hand up into Alex’s hair, keeping his head bowed, and lightly touches their foreheads together.
“I don’t deserve you, Alex.”
“Yes, you do. You deserve to be happy.” He smiles, a memory of something he said years ago coming back to him. “It took me a long time to realize it, but what I want does matter. And the same goes for you.”
Michael lets out a soft laugh, air from his nose tickling his mustache. They both remember that moment, at the reunion, with their reunion, where they’d danced on the fence between being honest and being scared, too many secrets between them and yet so, so much love. It had taken time to piece it all together, to put words to the feelings they shared, and to let each other in. Still, through it all, Michael knew it had been worth it. He would do it all over again if it meant keeping Alex in his arms.
Michael regains his voice. “… And if I say that what I want is you?”
“Then that works out perfectly. Because I want you too.”
The kiss that Alex leans in for is cut short by Michael’s smile, grinning so wide that he can’t keep their lips together. The next, once Michael focuses, is held together with Alex’s hands on his neck and his arms draped over Alex’s shoulders, their weight fully leaning into each other, as close to the other as possible. With his prosthetic still off, Alex can’t prop himself up as steadily as he’d normally be, but Michael is there to hold him, to lean back just a little further so Alex doesn’t have to think about keeping his balance. The rhythm feels so natural, so coordinated that Michael doesn’t even have to process it anymore. All he has to do is offer a hand to hold, or, in this case, an embrace to fall into, and Alex knows that he’ll stay upright.
This close, the glass pendants around their necks lean near each other in the air, until they come close enough to notch together with a soft clink.
Michael exhales when they part, shaking his head, like he still can’t believe his reality. “Talk about a twist ending. First you propose to me, then you have to go and nearly die on me, and now you’re awake and this is all still happening and then I proposed to you. The more I think on it, Manes, the more this does feel like a movie at the drive-in.”
“Please. Our lives have been filled with enough intergalactic chaos at this point to fill multiple films.” Alex teases.
“Alright, that’s fair.”
“Maybe, when I get to the other side of this, we could avoid too much chaos? At least for a little while. Maybe get out of town.”
“Planning the honeymoon already?”
“Yeah, but also, not exactly. I just want to…” Alex looks fondly up at Michael. Twirls a finger through his hair. Michael can read the meaning clearly on his face, soft and full of wonder.
“Live?”
“Yeah.”
Michael smiles. Right here, in this moment, with Alex alive and awake and with so much more life to live, it feels like he could never stop. “I’d love nothing more.”