Chapter Text
You woke up to Feferi giving you a bright smile as she removed the binds with a certain type precision of someone that has done this plenty of times, you let her do so without resisting her at all. When she's done, you stare at her for a short while and immediately snap at her. You're rightfully angry, obviously. Feferi taps her chin with her right index finger and then shrugs, but you're not taking her lousy dismissal as an answer.
CYNT: Feferi, why did you tie me up like that!? That wasn't nice at all!
FEFERI: I'm sorry, Cynfant but I couldn't let you )(urt yourself while it was yoar bedtime!
FEFERI: Also, you )(urt me s)(ore many times yesterday that I couldn't even count all your attempts. T)(at was very mean of you, I'm )(oping you won't be as violent as you were yesterday again.
FEFERI: If you keep up t)(is bad be)(aviour, I'll )(ave to punis)( you and I'm s)(ore you don't want t)(at, glubbie!
CYNT: I was only upset with you because you kept treating me like a baby, that's not my fault!
FEFERI: Cynfin, no more yelling please. Let's get you to t)(e bat)(room.
CYNT: Ugh, won't you listen to me, Feferi!?
Feferi holds your left hand with her right hand as she leads you into the dimly lit hallway and then back into her brightfully coloured castle walls, you near the ablutionblock as she called it. You walked over to the door, letting go of Feferi's hand and entering the room. You stood there absolutely weirded out on how odd it looked and you hadn't heard the door close, you began heading over to what you assumed to be the toilet until you heard a second pair of footsteps behind you.
CYNT: Gah, Feferi! What are you doing in here?
FEFERI: Cynfin, you know you're not able to use t)(e load gaper wit)(out any s)(elp! But don't worry, Feferi is )(ere to )(elp.
CYNT: No, you can't be in here! I already told you how much I don't like being babied, get out.
FEFERI: But, Cynfin–
CYNT: Feferi, if you don't get out of here right now I'll fucking hurt you with your damn trident! Get out.
FEFERI: )(e)(e, alrig)(ty t)(en! But I'll be staying rig)(t outside t)(e door just incase you need my )(elp with anyt)(ing, Cynfin.
CYNT: I don't care, fuck you!
You did your thing on the toilet and flushed it, you washed your hands and then saw a spare fuchsia toothbrush in new packaging that was shaped like a seahorse. You felt a small smile creep on your face and then grabbed some toothpaste, brushing your teeth and tongue. You weren't too fast but you weren't too slow either, you gave your face a quick wash and dried it off with a fuchsia towel that laid on a small chair. You opened the door and stepped out, looking to your left and seeing Feferi standing with her usual bubbly expression on her face. She raises up her right hand and ruffles your hair, petting you.
As if you are a pet.
FEFERI: Good girl, glubbie! Now let's )(ave breakfast, okay? Routines are very good for you, even if you don't know it yours)(ell!
CYNT: Please don't feed me that weird paste again, the sounds were getting on my nerves.
FEFERI: Let's swim toget)(er, Baby Current!~
CYNT: ...
Feferi can be a little weird sometimes, you've already taken note of that. You follow Feferi to the kitchen, you're not letting her guide you. You're following her out of your own free will. You sit down at the table, Feferi buises herself with her cabinets or whatever she's making you. Your mind starts to wander about, what if you could leave? And what if you could get your own house instead of living with someone else you don't know? You'll take a shot on asking Feferi about it, surely she'll say yes.
You don't hear the same sound coming from where she is, you feel content this time. Did she notice how uncomfortable and upset you were yesterday or is she just being considerate this time? It's frustrating to not know whether Feferi is good at spotting things you haven't voiced out, you don't know if people can really do that. She's mashing something up again though it's not loud like yesterday, you keep quiet and sit idly at the table.
Feferi brings you a small plate of soft foods and the main looks like mashed up avocados, there's also a paper dip full of some weird brown sauce. Well, you're not eating that. You quickly spot a small fruitbag filled with grapes and apple slices, that's pretty good. You look up at Feferi, she's seated right infront of you, it's just the opposite side of the table. Feferi smiles, having her own plate of whatever food she's eating.
FEFERI: Do you like your food, glubbie?
CYNT: Yes, it's actually better than yesterday's food. Thank you, Feferi.
FEFERI: Do you want me to feed you, glub glub?
CYNT: Uh, no thank you. I'm okay, Feferi.
FEFERI: Okay t)(en! If t)(ere is anyt)(ing you need, you can just give me a call because I'm rig)(t over )(ere.
CYNT: Well.. I was thinking about something, you know.
FEFERI: O)(, w)(at is it?
CYNT: I'd really like if I could have my own house, I mean.. I know I'm only sixteen years old but I'm definitely ready to live on my own.
CYNT: Uhm, I mean I'd like to since there's probably no way back home for me.
FEFERI: No, no, NO!
FEFERI: I'm sorry but you can't live on your own, glubbie. You're too weak and special to be outside in t)(e scary world!
FEFERI: Let's talk aboat somet)(ing else, like your first, official culler!
CYNT: Why won't you listen to me? I'm so tired of this, Feferi!
CYNT: You just dismiss and ignore everything I say, how do people even like you!?
FEFERI: Cynfant, it's not nice to be mean to ot)(er people. Especially your cullers, temporary or not.
FEFERI: If you're upset t)(en just tell me, I'll make everyt)(ing all better.
FEFERI: )(ere, dip t)(is fis)(ie nugget in your sweet )(oney sauce!
CYNT: No!
FEFERI: Aw, the poor fis)(ie is sad. W)(ale, it'll be waiting just )(ere for you on t)(e table, dear Baby Current!
FEFERI: I called Nepeta yesterday and s)(e's willing to be your very first culler. Isn't t)(at so nice of ))er, Cynfant? Glub, glub!!
FEFERI: Nepeta already knows about your needs and )(ow to )(andle your outbursts so you don't )(ave to worry about t)(at, and s)(e's very excited to meet you!
FEFERI: I'm also excited too, not because you're leaving, t)(at makes me sad and )(appy but I'm )(appy t)(at yoar finally settling in on Earth C.
FEFERI: Cynfin, you know it's quite difficult for ot)(ers.. even for t)(e c)(erubs too, us cullers are suc)( great people for )(elping out retards like you.
FEFERI: So w)(en you go, I'm going to give you one BIG )(UG! 38D
FEFERI: GLUB, GLUB!!!!!
CYNT: I'm finished my food.
FEFERI: Already? You )(aven't even touc)(ed your sweet )(oney dip, nor finished t)(e avocado....
CYNT: Feferi, don't make me more angry than I already am.
FEFERI: Okay t)(en, let's move on over to t)(e playroom. Come on, Baby Current!
Feferi gets up from her seat, her plate is empty. You pay it no mind but you get even more angry when the highblood grabs your left hand and practically pulls you out of the seat, you didn't like that. You barely managed to get ahold of the fruitbag in your right hand, dropping it on the kitchen floor as Feferi floats in the hallway. You let out a groan and jerk Feferi back, putting your feet on the floor again with force.
CYNT: Stop dragging me everywhere, Feferi!!!
FEFERI: W)(y, we're going to t)(e playroom?
CYNT: I dropped my fruitbag because of you, I want to eat it still!
FEFERI: I'll get it later for you, glubbie!
CYNT: Fine.
Feferi picks up her pace again and stops, she opens a door that is decorated with lots of colourful sea creatures and words. You let Feferi open the door and the inside is pitch black with the faint pink glow of a random chair illuminating the room, Feferi tells you to enter so you do. You weren't expecting it to be dark so that's very surprising, although other things take your attention from the darkness of the room.
CYNT: What are these things?
FEFERI: T)(ose s)(apes on t)(e wall arr t)(e quadrants us trolls use, we don't reely )(ave a use for t)(em anymore but it's a part of our culture! If you touc)( one, it will glow and explain it's meaning to you, glubbie!
CYNT: Okay, but what's with that large swing over there?
FEFERI: O)(, t)(at's for sensory fun! You s)(ould try it, my little Baby Current!
CYNT: Please, go back to calling me Cynfin again.
Feferi smiles and walks over to the glowing couch, you assume she's just relaxing and then divert your attention to the long swing on the other side of the room. You ignore the weird fuchsia looking thing and start walking towards the swing, you won't admit it to Feferi but you do want to have fun and it looks fun.
But that's only because you have nothing else to do, that's definitely it.
FEFERI: And remember, I'm rig)(t over )(ere if you need my s)(ellp! Please don't )(esitate to call me over, Cynfant!
CYNT: Yes, Feferi..
You stare at the swing, you want to play with it but you feel like you'd be given into this culling system you're being put into. You sigh and put your anger aside, pushing the swing with your two hands. It moves, swinging backwards and forwards, you watch it come to a halt and move closer to it. You enter the swing acquiescingly, sitting down and feel yourself sink into the seat. You feel your face get heated and you look over at Feferi, she's on her Ipad but she glances up towards you. You divert your gaze to the ground and then realise you don't know what to do, there's no holes for your legs to move so they're criss-crossed and you can't exactly move the swing with your body weight.
You hear footsteps but you don't look up, Feferi has gotten up and is now to your right, pointing at something. She taps your shoulder, making you look at where she's pointing at.
FEFERI: See t)(is, glubbie? T)(ese are buttons, t)(ey )(elp you do most t)(ings and function–
CYNT: I know, I know.. What do these specific buttons do, though?
FEFERI: T)(is green button powers on t)(e swing and makes it bounce, t)(e red one makes it stop.
FEFERI: T)(is circle will c)(ange the direction of t)(e swing! )(ere, let me s)(ow you!
CYNT: Oh, this is... fun.
FEFERI: Glub, glub! It's super fun, rig)(t?
FEFERI: So w)(at direction do you want it in, glubbie?
CYNT: Left and right..
FEFERI: Okay, t)(ere you go! If you need me, I'm rig)(t over )(ere.
CYNT: Thank you, Feferi.
As much as you'd like it not to be true, you are enjoying the swing. So perhaps it's not so bad afterall? Even though you're still upset about being babied and treated like you're a kid, you can still let yourself have this one moment of fun. After a little while you get bored and switch the direction to up and down, now you're really having fun! You closed your eyes shut and began rocking your head to the music playing in your head. It's possible to replay songs in your head, right?
Feferi comes along and presses the red button, claiming that it's time for social play. Feferi helps you out the swing and leads you back to the main playroom area, sitting you down on a soft mat and getting out various amounts of toys. Your interest is immediately piqued and you go for the stacking toys, they're squares and their corners are already filed down to be safe as Feferi puts it. You would believe her if she wouldn't stop babying you, she keeps narrating everything you do in baby-talk and making up random stories with the fish plushies. Which you won't lie, they are pretty good at keeping you hooked.
Then comes cuddling time.
FEFERI: Sea? You like t)(ese simple t)(ings, don't you, Cynfin?
CYNT: I'm hungry, Feferi. Where did you put that fruitbag from earlier?
FEFERI: GLUB, GLUB!!! It's in my cooler, Cyntail!
CYNT: Uh.
Feferi leads you over to a plushie-filled corner and sits the both of you down before pulling you into her hold, you struggle, feeling shock, confusion and fear settling into your very quickly. Your arms touch hers, you're trying to pull yourself off but her grasp is tight. You realise something that is now only coming to you, she's a different species. She's definitely Troll if you rule out her brief mention about Cherubs, and she's also a highblood at the top of the caste system.
Feferi is stronger than you.
FEFERI: Relax, Cyntail! It's time for some s)(ellf refined coddling time.
CYNT: Ugh, let me go!!
FEFERI: Reelax, I've got yoar fruity, juicy fruitbag reef over )(ere, Cynfant!
CYNT: Whatever.
FEFERI: S)(ouldn't you be t)(anking me? If not.. t)(en NO FOOD FOR YOU!!!!
CYNT: Feferi, stop! Please just give me the fruitbag already, you know I'm hungry.
CYNT: Please.
FEFERI: Please isn't a t)(ank you.. so NO!
CYNT: You've got me in this chokehold of ours, how am I supposed to function like this!?
CYNT: I didn't even ask for this and you're expecting me to say thank you when I'm in a position I don't want to be in? You're crazy!!!
FEFERI: Fine, fine.. I )(ear you, just say t)(ank you and I'll loosen my grip!
CYNT: Ugh..
CYNT: Thank you, Feferi.
FEFERI: Floor?
CYNT: What did you say?
FEFERI: )(E)(E, NEVERMIND!!!! 38D
FEFERI: )(ere you go, my dear Sparklefin! Good manners deserve good rewards, don't you agree?
You immediately begin eating the fruitbag full of sliced apples and grapes, the grapes are your favourite kind, the red crunchy ones. Yummy!
When you're finished, Feferi doesn't loosen her grip but she tightens it. You don't resist her anymore because you're too tired, instead you opt to resting your hands and body reluctantly. All that resisting and yelling made you tired and exhausted, you could definitely go for a nap right now. You still feel that lingering annoyance and dread from earlier, you're glad you avoided the padded room and its darkness. Even though this room is dark, it's dimly lit up by the glowing couch. And Feferi holding you makes you feel not so scared anymore, you're happy.
You hear Feferi hum some songs and tunes you don't know of but they're comforting and make you feel soothed, that's a good thing. You feel yourself slipping in and out of consciousness, you decide a quick nap won't hurt. You deserve a calm moment, even amidst all the seriousness of it all, of tomorrow and your first, official culling. You try not to think about it and you can faintly hear Feferi mumbling about something, you recognise one sentence of her saying you're her "special little retard." You ignore it, thinking it's a figment of your imagination and the fact that you're very tired.
You've closed your eyes a short while ago, your body softens around Feferi's own body and grip. You fall asleep snoring softly in the dimly light room, Feferi smiles and pets your head as you sleep. She lets go and places a couple fish-shaped pillows underneath your head and draws a soft fuchsia coloured blanket on your form.
Feferi made you feel safe.