Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Despite all of his protests, anyone with functional eyes could see that Shen Shi is fading. Shen Jiu most of all. How could his brother stand to wake himself up every night coughing until he pukes and still go on the next day claiming it to be some minor illness? How could he not realize that with every stumble, every near-faint and retch, he's dying?

Shen Jiu knows his brother had never truly shaken off the illness that had nearly killed him all those years ago. It has been a passive spectre, flaring only on the coldest of winter days. But with every new day of torment and humiliation, Shen Shi fades. With every private lesson, he weakens. With every late night moment where he pushes Shen Jiu's own failure of a body back into alignment, he makes his own worse. Shen Jiu is the reason his brother is dying.

He curses his own spiteful nature often. He should've let that horse run wild, damn the rest! He should've kicked up a fight when the money was trading hands. He should kill them both to spare them the indignity of this fucking hell pit even one second longer!

Sometimes...he eyes his brother's peaceful face at night. Flushed, and totally helpless. He eyes that too-thin neck. He could save his brother. He would make it quick. Wrapping his hands around Shen Shi's throat is all too easy. Even there, they slot together perfectly. Shen Jiu has felt his brother's breath push in and out, hitching on some unseen obstacle that makes the skin under his hands jump and quiver.

In the end, though, he has always redirected his hands until they are holding on to Shen Shi's own. To be alone in this hell—even in the seconds it would take to end himself after his brother—is too much to withstand. He curses his cowardice, too.

It had been an elaborate dinner for several important merchant families. Qiu Jianluo had insisted they both be at his side to serve refreshments and be ogled in their complimentary, mirrored attire. Halfway through the party, Shen Shi had asked quietly to be excused, his hands already shaking and sweat pooling at his temples. Qiu Jianluo flatly refused.

As dessert was served, Shen Shi fainted.

To save face, Qiu Jianluo had made a big show of ordering his dear Shi-er to be taken to the medical house at once and for the local doctor to be called.

Of course, the "medical house" was the old wood shed. Not that the guests would know that.

Afterwards and in private, Shen Jiu had demanded his brother receive real treatment. Didn't he see that Shen Shi was on the brink of death? Didn't Qiu Jianluo care that his perfect matched set would be ruined?

Shen Jiu was strung up for a day and beaten until he couldn't walk for his impudence. Then he was dumped into the wood shed too.

"Look, Xiao Jiu! I've found a doctor for little Shi-er. If even you can't make him healthy, then I suppose I should start preparing for a funeral. Unless, of course, you get on your knees and beg me for medicine."

Even bloody and disoriented, Shen Jiu knew it was a trap. A tantalizing carrot on a switch that would crack down on his back as soon as he tried to reach for it. So, he refused. The door had slammed in his face and then locked with a heavy clunk.

That had been hours ago.

He'd done everything he could. He'd tried to focus and feel out his brother's energy, to do for his twin what Shen Shi always did so easily for Shen Jiu. All that he felt was clammy skin burning too hot in a freezing room. He switches to piling up straw and dirt to be blankets. Carefully brushing Shen Shi's hair from his face and soothing the furrow in his brow. Shen Jiu holds his twin's hand and whispers prayer after prayer after prayer for his health.

Then Shen Shi stops breathing.

It's in snatches of seconds at a time. He comes back with a weak splutter but the gap of silence in between when he stops and when he starts keeps growing. Shen Jiu looks around but there's only dirt and straw scattered about the floor. There is nothing left in this room that could help.

Shen Jiu slams himself into the door. He scratches at the hinges and handle until pieces of his nails chip away. When one fully flies out of its bed he curses and continues to scratch. So much of his own body thrums in agony that he can ignore the brilliant flares of pain in his hands if it means getting help for his brother. The old wood should be soft with age, shouldn't it? Still, it stands firm, and all he gets are splinters and bleeding fingers.

Battering it down could work, but as soon as he struggles to his feet for leverage he's crashing right back to the ground. He tries to break it down anyways and is forced to stop when he almost passes out against it from the pain. He could try digging a way out next but—it's still early spring and the ground has yet to thaw. He stares blankly down at his ruined fingers. They twitch and bleed. He thinks they might be tingling? It's hard to tell. They'd be utterly useless at digging. He keeps staring. The thought comes to him gently.

He can't get out.

Something huge and hot cracks right next to his heart. He sinks deeper into the dirt, pressing his face to that fucking door and he gives in. "Please! Please, medicine please! Help! I'll do anything just help him please!"

His eyes are burning pits in his face and he can hardly breathe past the mucus building in his nose and falling down his throat. He wails as loud as his lungs will take him. When nothing comes of it, he starts screaming. The words that leave him don't make it to his own ears. He is begging, grovelling, swearing to anyone that will listen everything he could ever have to give.

Ah, but, is there anyone to listen?

The realization strikes him dumb. His voice dies in his throat and he can faintly hear the sounds of crickets and star gazing frogs outside. It's the dead of night. No one but the guards at the gate are awake. The house won't rise for many hours more. And who knew when Qiu Jianluo would bother coming to check on them. Was there a window of time where he had been waiting? Could Shen Jiu have saved Shen Shi if he'd given up on his pride sooner?

No, those questions are pointless. He digs his mangled fingers into the wood grain and scowls. He knows Qiu Jianluo very well. The man had probably walked away as soon as the door had shut. There was never any hope of medicine.

Shen Jiu slumps to the ground, his back pressed up against the door so he can watch Shen Shi across the room. How funny. They're both curled the same way.

Ah, Shen Shi is going to die buried under dirt and straw in an old wood shed tucked away in the far corner of an estate that belongs to a horrible man. What would they do with the body? Qiu Jianluo wouldn't bury it. He'd probably end up using it as just another carrot on the end of a switch to get Shen Jiu to bend further to his desires.

Shen Jiu knows he should ruin his brother before anyone else gets the chance. He should kill Shen Shi, mangle him so horribly no one would ever dare to look at or touch his little brother's body ever again. Spare him a future as a toy for cruelty. Free him from all humiliation, even in death. Let him be useful rather than used. Shen Jiu should fish out a bone and chew it into a key. He should. He really, really should.

He can't bring himself to move.

Minutes or hours stretch into nothing as he watches the other half of himself struggle to die. Then, faintly, a mutter.

"It has to be this one..." Someone says, muffled footsteps coming closer to the woodshed.

Shen Jiu forces himself to his knees, pressing up against the door once more to try and get a look through the keyhole. If it's one of the new guards, maybe they could be swayed. "Hello?" He calls, his voice cracking horribly.

The footsteps stop, then shuffle rapidly his way. A soft thud and the door shakes under his touch, as if someone had put their own hand to its surface. "Is that you? Xiao Jiu?" The voice is achingly familiar. That heat in his chest pulses bright blisters into the walls of his heart.

"Qi-ge?" He doesn't want to be right.

"Yes!" Qi-ge is breathless on the other side of the door. "Yes, it's me!"

Shen Jiu has already begged once tonight. He hopes he never has to do it again, but he is desperate. "You have to open the door! Right now! Get this open, please."

Silence from the other side drags on far too long and what little patience he has snaps in half. "Qi-ge you have to get this open, there's no time-!"

"I can't!" Qi-ge says. "I...I can't. Not right now."

Begging on his knees twice feels suddenly trivial in the face of having hope die a second time in Shen Jiu's chest. The cold of the room finds a home in its place. It should soothe the blisters around his heart, but all it does is chafe.

Ignorant, Yue Qi continues. "I've finally joined a sect and I've begun cultivating but I'm- I try to push it to find you faster and I get weaker instead of stronger. I can't break this door down without alerting all of the guards, and I can't fight that many people off. So...I'm scouting tonight, but- but tomorrow-!"

Shen Jiu stares at the wood grain of the door, emptied out entirely. "My legs are broken," he says. Yue Qi starts making noises again so Shen Jiu continues. "They broke both of my legs. I can't run. Shen Shi is dead." It's only a lie if Yue Qi opens the door and proves him wrong. Shen Jiu waits for his words to fan the fire, for them to push Yue Qi into unveiling his lies, but...

The voice outside the door shatters into unrecognizable pieces. "They broke Xiao Jiu's legs? Xiao Shi is...dead?" A rustle of fabric and then the sound of someone muffling their sobs into their arm. "How...how long ago...?"

Hope dies thrice that night. "Days," Shen Jiu says.

"I'm so sorry." The voice cries. "I've failed you, both of you. I should've pushed harder, I should've insisted more I- I...am so sorry, Xiao Jiu. I'm so sorry."

It's the last thing he wants to hear. "Will you open the door? Will you? Promise me."

"I- as I am I'm too weak to-" the voice chokes on something in its throat. "But, I have...an idea. I'll need a few days to make this work but once it's done I'll have all the power I could ever need to save you. Four- no, three days. I'll do it in three days. Can you- will you last that long?"

"Please," Shen Jiu says. "Please hurry. Before they kill me, too."

The voice scrambles up on the other side of the door. Soft metallic sounds, an empty scabbard in a belt, clatter along with the motion. "Yes, yes, just three days and I'll be back here. Xiao Jiu I promise. Three days. Please wait for me."

"Please," it's all Shen Jiu can say any more. The voice says some more parting words that he doesn't hear, and then it scrambles back the way it came. It's just him and Shen Shi again. As it always has been, he supposes.

He crawls across the floor to sit at his brother's side. He should reach for that throat but instead his fingers dance across his twin's forehead and gently twist flyaway hairs back into place. "Please," he whispers, "please, please, please."

He sits vigil at Shen Shi's side. In the day, he holds his hands cupped under the leaky spot in the roof and catches snowmelt there. He passes mouthfuls to Shen Shi in careful dribbles and keeps every fifth one for himself. Shen Jiu's fingers ache then go numb by the first day, but he doesn't care. He sits, silent, and waits.

He waits and waits and waits and waits and waits and waits and waits and waits and says nothing.

Five days pass and Shen Shi's eyes finally open. His breath is still stuttering in his chest, but he's breathing consistently at least. "Jiu-ge?"

Shen Jiu brushes the old sweat from his brother's face. He hums.

"I dreamed...that Qi-ge came." Shen Shi mumbles. "It sounded so real...did it happen? Did he come back?"

Shen Jiu keeps running his swollen fingers through Shen Shi's hair. It helps keep it untangled and clean and it warms him, too. He likes to be practical. "Go back to sleep." He says.

His twin closes his eyes, his nose scrunching weakly above thinned lips. "Oh," Shen Shi whispers. "Never mind, then."

It's only after he's finished saying his smug line that Shen Yuan gets one single moment of clarity. He finally looks away from his brother and locks eyes with none other than the protagonist. Ah, and what a shape the protagonist cuts! With a fine jaw and thin lips pulled into a thoughtful frown, long coils of hair spilling artfully down his back, a high, smooth brow, and beneath it eyes that put the night sky to shame with how they shine. Intelligence, power, cunning. Those eyes say it all. Luo Binghe...your key art doesn't do your incredible aura justice!

Luo Binghe who is perhaps six feet away. Luo Binghe...who is the power source for the System.

Fuck! Shen Yuan had been living the past couple decades System-free, so he'd totally forgotten! Reconnecting now would be a death sentence if there were quests or rules he was supposed to be following. Well, not that there was much he could do about it now except keep his distance from the protagonist. Something totally do-able as the dramatically revealed long lost twin brother to his scum Shizun! Surely no protagonist needs to be curious about this development! Surely he can turn those brilliant, star-like eyes another way and slip away from the hands beloved by the heavens and infamously unwilling to let anything go again! AH HAH HAH HAH. Yeah, no, Shen Yuan's totally fucked.

But, for now, he needs to focus on the trial. He can work on an exit strategy later. Maybe he'll just kill himself? Hmm...Anyway. He deploys his fan to idly waft in front of him. It keeps his hands busy so his expression can stay flat and his brain can start working through arguments ahead of time. He scans the faces around once more to get an idea of who would be saying what and in which order. Liu Mingyan, Qiu Haitang, and Shen Qingqiu are openly glaring at him. Ning Yingying looks alarmingly pale, and Luo Binghe looks alarmingly neutral. Ah, what a welcoming array of expressions.

The Old Palace Master, creepy fuck that he is, just smiles. "This assembly has already heard Qiu Haitang's overview of things. Shen Yuan should give his own, then the two of you may engage in discourse until the matter is settled. I will be nearby to maintain civility as needed." He says, demurring in a way totally unbefitting of his age.

"Of course," Shen Yuan says. "To begin, Qiu Haitang is correct when she says that Shen Qingqiu—and I, naturally—were slaves purchased by the Qiu estate and later Qiu Jianluo directly." A flurry of whispers followed this, that can't be all true, I can hardly believe the Xiu Ya sword was really…how embarrassing. Shen Yuan ignores them, continuing, "Qiu Jianluo loved his little sister very much, and kept her isolated in the estate from all evils. The evils of pain, yes, but also companionship. To her, Qiu Jianluo's slaves…what else were they than funny new playmates? This one cannot fault Qiu Haitang for her ignorance in youth—not when she was just as wrapped up in Qiu Jianluo's lies and manipulations. In turn, please do not begrudge the bitterness that grew in a slave's heart."

Qiu Haitang, for her part, does not look too outraged or embarrassed by this speech. She merely takes in a short breath, frowning delicately. "A lady would never dare begrudge one for their feelings. But she would ask for more detail to ease her own. For in her mind, were you not given every kindness? Good clothes and snacks, lessons in literature and calligraphy that would serve any young master well in their life. A home free from the chill and danger of the outside world. The life Qiu Jianluo gave you both was well beyond what you could have achieved on your own. And Shen Jiu repays him with death?"

"Getting ahead of ourselves, are we?" Shen Yuan mutters. "It's true, the lessons from Qiu Jianluo will live on in my memory for a very long time indeed. But 'free from danger'? Well, the outside world, sure, but what of dangers inside the home? From your examples, clothes! Deliberately chosen to highlight our mirrored nature for guests to admire, never for our own fulfilment. Fine enough to alienate and isolate us from the paid servants in the manor. Snacks! A method of control or punishment, since meals had to come from the chef—the chef who was none too pleased to have two lowly children seemingly above him. How convenient to provide essentials to the needy and demand praise when it is one's own actions that created the need in the first place. Even the chill became a tool to demand obedience. Haitang-meimei, do you remember the old wood shed on the north of the estate?"

"Yes, I do." She keeps her chin high. He can almost respect her for that.

"Mm, I do too. Though Shen Qingqiu may have a greater memory than either of us. I almost died there as your brother forbade me any medicine or help unless Shen Qingqiu begged for it. Even after he had, he was still forced to watch me struggle for five days, starving." Shen Yuan says.

More gasps from the crowd, but he doesn't lets his eyes stray from Qiu Haitang. Her face is paler, but her expression remains still as a spring pond. "My heart hurts for you, Shi-Gongzi. And yet I struggle to believe my brother would be so heartless. Now, I cannot refute the idea that servants, prone to jealousy, could have made your life harder in our estate. It's not hard to imagine them disobeying his orders and forcing your suffering to continue behind his back, though I hate to speak ill of them. Especially as none of them are here with us today to stand and speak their grievances." Ah, little miss, still hanging on to that classism are you? And even tacking on a guilt trip right at the end there? Truly you're not someone to be underestimated. "Yet you yourself admitted the lessons with my brother have stayed with you. I know how much he adored both you and Shen Jiu, no matter how servants may have defied his orders out of jealousy. Even if you can only see twisted schemes in it, the sheer amount of time he spent with the two of you speaks for itself."

Shen Yuan ducks his smirk behind his fan. Hah hah! Haitang-meimei, you've fallen for my trap card! "Hours and hours," he agrees loftily. "Days and nights, enduring humiliation directly under his hand." More exclamations and unsubtle whispering arise from the crowd but he doesn't have time to indulge them just yet. "Qiu Jianluo adored beating his lessons into our bones and leveraging us against each other, just to see how far he could push us until we broke. Forcing a happy facade over it to keep you in the dark and use you to create punishments. No matter one's station in life, to take out any emotion against the flesh of a child is an atrocious act—the lowest of the low! As anyone with any ounce of virtue in their soul would agree!" He takes a breath. Qiu Haitang still doesn't look truly shaken, but he has to approach this next part very carefully.

He forces his anger down until he can move past it. Slowly, like pulling candy, Shen Yuan says, "that is why, it may be of no surprise, that your brother finally pushed too far and was killed, along with many, many others. That his entire estate had to burn for his crimes. And that I was the one to do it. Haitang-meimei, you always did have trouble telling the two of us apart."

A sharp cry goes up from below. A collective shuffling follows as the gathered masters and wanderers jump to their feet in outrage. Shen Yuan keeps Qiu Haitang's eyes throughout it all. They've gone wide and suddenly nervous. All of the blood leaping from her face to pool in her knuckles as she grips tight to the hem of her robe. Is she scared? He supposes it is rather different to throw accusations and vitriol at someone bound and helpless than it is to lay them at the feet of someone with ready access to a sword.

The Old Palace Master steps between them, his calm facade broken open into something more calculating. "Patience, everyone! Peace! Cultivator Shen Yuan, are you admitting to this hall that you were responsible for the Qiu massacre?"

"Did my mouth move without me? Yes, I did it."

If anything, the hall falls into even more chaos when he says it a second time. One of the other wandering cultivators stands tall among the crowd. "A confession to such brutality! He should be arrested at once!"

Shen Yuan openly rolls his eyes. "Have the laws of the Emperor suddenly taken over the Jianghu? If a demon were to hurt your sons, daughters, brothers, sisters, wives, or husbands, would you not track them down to their village and burn that to the ground? If they've wronged you, is it not just to repay that wrong ten times over?"

"An upstanding member of society can hardly be likened to a demon." A young man dressed in pale purple robes says. "You can't hold them to the same level as humans."

"A demon will scream in pain and sorrow just as loudly as any human." Shen Yuan says through his teeth.

That same purple cultivator snorts loudly. "So does a cow! You don't see farmers weeping over their butchered livestock."

Shen Yuan opens his mouth to continue, but The Old Palace Master flicks out his sleeves, the shine of the golden thread catching the light and quieting the gathered crowds. "Esteemed masters, gentle your hearts and minds. We are here for the trial of Shen Qingqiu and that has not changed. One inflammatory piece of testimony will not overturn our systems of justice and fairness."

Taking stock of the situation, Qiu Haitang looks deathly pale, and Ning YingYing and Liu Mingyan are trading quiet words. Luo Binghe is staring intently right at Shen Yuan. Jolting, he chances a look over at Shen Qingqiu who—honestly, looks a bit lost. As soon as he sees his twin looking though, that expression is tucked right back behind a disdainful, immortal master mask. Well, two can play that game. Shen Yuan lifts his chin, looking down through his lashes at the Old Palace Master. "Do you take me for a liar?"

The old man raises his palms in supplication. "Certainly not, Cultivator Shen. However, my years have taught me to trust in the words of others while verifying their actions in turn. It would not be strange for a family member, moved by filial piety, to step in front of a sword blow meant for one of their own."

"And how would you like to verify my deeds? As Haitang-guniang has pointed out, aside from those in this room already, who could be left that remembers the event?" Unsaid, who would anyone here trust to speak the truth? With both Shen Yuan and Qiu Haitang in disagreement, could anyone willingly turn to Shen Qingqiu for answers?

Obviously not. Everyone in this room had rallied together to tear that man to shreds, they couldn't trust anything he might say. The Old Palace Master knows this, too, and makes a great show of considering Shen Yuan's question. "It seems for the fire itself, all we may have is testimony. However, if Qiu Jianluo's mistreatment of you and your brother was so severe, surely there must be some lingering evidence of it."

Shen Yuan raises a brow. "Are you asking me to disrobe, Palace Master?"

That gets a reaction from his twin brother who looks about five seconds away from strangling Shen Yuan, immortal binding cables or no. Not to mention the uproar from their onlookers below. The Old Palace Master himself pauses, taking a delicate moment to decide on how best to steer the conversation again.

Shen Qingqiu does not let him get very far. "How low can one be?" He scoffs. "Such endurance should be applauded. It's not everyday one can see another bear their decades-old shame so brazenly as to make the removal of clothes sound trivial."

"I wasn't aware truth and shame had been confused." Shen Yuan says, deliberately affecting innocence. "What a miserable life, indeed, for anyone who has mixed up the two."

"I wonder if it is more arrogance or naïveté to see no shame in a truth." Shen Qingqiu replies.

Shen Yuan snorts and closes his eyes so no one can see him roll them. Yes, it's going to be hard to meet the eyes of anyone else at the trial today. Though, Jiu-ge, have some confidence please! Shen Yuan is being very careful to keep the worst details tucked away in his sleeves! He's simply reciting the facts—he's had a lot of time to get used to them. "Perhaps it is fear that shows one only shame, no matter the truth."

The Old Palace Master coughs gently into his sleeves. "Pardon my interruption, but, to keep the dialogue on topic, there are many ways to prove an old wound aside from disrobing, Cultivator Shen. Such hardship can often be seen through any scars left in one's spiritual veins."

"This lowly one would be willing to help with the examination." Luo Binghe offers, sitting a little straighter on his cushion.

The Old Palace Master begins to chuckle out some grandfatherly words of praise but Shen Yuan cuts in, "there's no need." He says, a little too quick to be casual. He could NOT let Luo Binghe touch him, let alone mingle their qi together! Keep the electricity off while untangling dangerous wires! "Perhaps a member of the audience could be of service here. You spoke of filial piety earlier, why not let Mu Qingfang examine Shen Qingqiu's veins? I'm sure he's done so before."

On queue, almost every eye turns to where the Cang Qiong Mountain Sect masters are seated. One wiry man with small glasses perched on his nose and a very thin moustache purses his lips. That must be Mu Qingfang then. The whole atrium holds their breath as the man mulls over his answer.

"How dare you," a clear, feminine voice says.

Hiding his surprise very poorly, Shen Yuan turns and meets the level gaze of Liu Mingyan. Ah! His favourite character! Please stop looking at this panicking man like he's a worm in your fruit bowl! He likes her very much and wants to give her some time to shine, too, so Shen Yuan tilts his head and says, "hm?"

Liu Mingyan doesn't need to stand to make her presence felt in the room. Her voice demands to be heard without her having to raise it. Her back is held straight and proud, the epitome of grace and power. She lets her eyes trail away from Shen Yuan and over to Shen Qingqiu. "How dare you speak of filial piety. Shen Qingqiu has always detested his fellow sect siblings. To ask them to come to his defence now is a selfish request."

"Perhaps," Shen Yuan admits, softer. He is a self-serving person to the core, he can't deny it. Of course she would be offended by such a request on the behalf of her sect. Shen Qingqiu killed her brother, after all. Someone he was supposed to treat as his own brother. And, truly, this request is only being made so Shen Yuan can save his own flimsy skin. "Apologies, I don't mean any offence to you or Cang Qiong Mountain Sect. But I can think of no better medical cultivator under heaven than Mu Qingfang. He is a trusted and upright member of society. His diagnosis will carry weight few else could."

Liu Mingyan's eyes narrow ever so slightly. Then she closes them and dips her head in understanding.

Below, Yue Qingyuan says a few low words to Mu Qingfang before releasing the other man to ascend the central platform. Mu Qingfang looks wildly uncomfortable as he crests the stairs. His eyes keep darting between all of the assembled faces and he can't seem to decide where they should land.

The Old Palace Master, once again trying to take control of things, bows to Mu Qingfang. Once returned, the older man smiles serenely. "As the Peak Lord of Qian Cao, you have surely seen almost every member of your sect once. What do you make of Cultivator Shen's claim of childhood mistreatment?"

"To speak frankly, Qingqiu-shixiong has always been rather independent when it came to his own health and wellbeing." Mu Qingfang clears his throat. "However, I have noticed some patterns in my shixiong's spiritual veins that would align with repeated injuries. I can't say if they're from childhood or his own journey through cultivation, though. Not without deeper study." He pauses, then turns to Shen Qingqiu and holds his hand out. "May I?"

"No," Shen Qingqiu replies immediately.

So stubborn! And for what? Does he think being so uncooperative makes him look cool!? Shen Yuan sighs and offers up his own hand. "You can look at mine, if you wish."

Mu Qingfang glances over at Qiu Haitang, still pale and staring at Shen Yuan rather intently, before nodding. He picks up Shen Yuan's hand between clinical fingers and begins pushing his own qi through Shen Yuan's system. Mu Qingfang's qi is clear and smooth, like an untainted stream. It ventures through Shen Yuan's veins quickly and thoroughly. Pushing and prodding where necessary, but never overstaying its welcome. After a few minutes, Mu Qingfang steps back, standing much taller now than he had been.

"Based on the state of Shen-gongzi's meridians, I would come to the conclusion that he had endured significant injury and stress very early in life. The foundational pathways are twisted and brittle in the way I typically see in..." The man pauses, briefly looking over to Shen Yuan. Shen Yuan, touched by Mu Qingfang's kindness, nods ever so slightly. Mu Qingfang takes a deep breath, "in victims of abuse. If he began cultivating soon after, well, leaving the estate or during his time there, that would align with what I felt in the meridians."

Qiu Haitang presses a trembling hand to her mouth. Her eyes clenched tightly shut as she sinks down onto her pillow. Shen Yuan watches her muffle her cries into her palms and...ah, where is that feeling of victory? He'd proven her wrong, he'd won their verbal sparring match. This is where he would typically kick back from his keyboard, oozing satisfaction at a job well done. But watching the isolated little meimei crumble under the truth of her brother's cruelty only leaves him feeling cold; a bit lost. All she had ever done to him was be ignorant. She shouldn't have to bear the weight of her brother's crimes. Ah, but, just like back then, he had to worry about himself and Shen Jiu first. He forces himself to put all his worry for Qiu Haitang into the farthest corners of his mind.

"Many thanks for your expertise, Peak Lord Mu." The Old Palace Master says.

Mu Qingfang gives one short nod of his own before promptly beelining for the stairs once more. It's probably a good thing that a doctor has such aversion to dramatics and gossip.

Quietly, Ning Yingying leans over from where she's sat to press a small silk cloth into Qiu Haitang's hands. "Take slow, deep breaths." She whispers. Only those standing close enough to the two women could hear her—regardless of cultivation level.

Shen Yuan quickly averts his eyes. It feels much too intimate for him to be listening in on, especially when he himself is the one who made those tears fall. He gives the Old Palace Master a thin smile. "Are we still progressing chronologically? As I understand it, there are four more accusations to be addressed."

"Is Cultivator Shen staying with us?"

"Only as far as I am allowed, elder."

There's some mutterings from below, one person doesn't know how to whisper and "he should be allowed a length of chain," makes it up above the din. The Old Palace Master hums but decides its a battle he doesn't want to fight. "I see no reason not to continue in order," the elderly man says, "Liu Mingyan? You have the floor."

The woman remains sitting. She turns to address Shen Qingqiu directly and makes unflinching eye contact with her shibo. "While in seclusion in the Ling Xi caves, my brother, Liu Qingge, and Shen Qingqiu were completely alone. When my brother suffered a qi deviation, Shen Qingqiu took the opportunity to horribly impair my brother's cultivation, resulting in his near-permanent injury. Do you deny this?"

Shen Qingqiu meets her stare. "No, I do not."

The crowd of filthy gossips and head shakers make more of their noises. Shen Yuan taps his fan against his chin. Liu Qingge isn't dead? Weird...what changed in the Ling Xi caves to keep him alive? "Would it not be wise to expand on the events in the Ling Xi caves? If you do not deny the results, Peak Lord Shen, then context should be given for the sake of closure."

The Old Palace Master looks like he's seriously regretting letting Shen Yuan stay up here. Well, too bad, old man! You made the fatal mistake of inviting Shen Yuan to ask questions and failed to kick him out after the first round—he's prepared to be a shameless pedant and grasp onto every single straw of testimony dangled his way!

His twin scoffs. "What more is there to say? He flew into a qi deviation like a madman and I ruined him in return. It's rather cut and dry."

"Like a madman?" Shen Yuan repeats. "What was the altercation like in the Ling Xi caves?"

"Unimportant in the wake of its finale." Shen Qingqiu says.

"Ah, but doesn't every question in a trial deserve an answer, no matter its source nor objective quality?" Shen Yuan shoots right back.

His twin scowls fiercely at him, his jaw visibly clenching. "As any cultivator may know, qi deviations are no small matter. Those who go through them are trapped in turmoil that warps the perception of both themselves and the world around them. Liu Qingge is not so special as to be exempt from this. You can use your imagination."

Shen Yuan hums. He glances over at Liu Mingyan, but she has turned away from his twin, her hands folded neatly in her lap. She already got her answer, he supposes. Still, he's not satisfied with simply accepting the ending to a story without any of the middle. To Shen Qingqiu, "did Liu Qingge attack you?"

"We fought," Shen Qingqiu says around a sneer. Which isn't a no.

Oh, Jiu-ge. Shen Yuan's heart lurches painfully in his chest. His brother has always been private to an outrageous degree. Shen Qingqiu prefers to speak through his actions, no matter how many fancy, flowery words he'd throw in your face. Often, what he doesn't say is more important than what he does. Shen Yuan deliberately tries to catch Liu Mingyan's eye. "Miss Liu, who discovered the two peak lords in the Ling Xi caves? Do you know what the scene looked like?"

"Shang-shishu was the one to find them." She says slowly. "The state of the caves, I cannot say. And before you ask, Shang-shishu has been missing since the last Immortal Alliance conference. We cannot ask him for his testimony."

No doubt becoming the ultimate sleazy henchman to Mobei-jun, Shen Yuan muses. Though, it's still odd that Shang Qinghua would be the one to discover the state of the caves. Did the northern demon lord want to keep the Bai Zhan War God around? But why? Wouldn't Liu Qingge be a threat to Mobei-jun?

Shen Yuan shakes his wild speculation away. He'll have to pick more at that problem later. "Then it sounds like Liu Qingge went into a qi deviation and ended up getting into a fight with the only other living thing in the caves. Shen Qingqiu may very well have been defending himself."

Liu Mingyan shakes her head. "Be that as it may, as his shixiong, Shen Qingqiu had a duty to Liu Qingge. Instead of being honourable and showing his care for his sect siblings, Peak Lord Shen decided to let his petty grudge take over and horribly mangle my brother."

"You seem so certain that Shen Qingqiu didn't even try to help Liu Qingge. Are relations between them really so terrible?"

"Is it any wonder," Luo Binghe cuts in, "that no one would expect filiality from him? Qiu Haitang originally mentioned that he'd cut his own blood twin to pieces. While untrue, he's certainly been making mince of your defences with his words. It lends very well to a pattern with Shen Qingqiu—an utter lack of care for anyone deemed his brother. That's just the sort of animal he is."

Shen Yuan narrows his eyes. In the original novel, Luo Binghe had simply sat back and watched as Shen Qingqiu's lies crumbled under his feet while the scum villain tied his own noose on the stand. Yet here he'd been interrupting more and more frequently. Young Demon Lord just what are you up to? "How prescriptive. Two points make a line, not a pattern. And, honestly, this is what civil care looks like between us. Our relationship, however, is not the one relevant to our conversation. Tell me, what are things like between Shen Qingqiu and Liu Qingge?"

"They have a uniquely hateful dynamic." Liu Mingyan says. "It's very well known that both of them cannot stand one another."

"So," Shen Yuan flutters his fan open for emphasis, "if you were in the middle of a qi deviation and came across someone you cannot stand even when you have all of your faculties under control, would you let them get close enough to help you?"

"It is unlikely," Liu Mingyan allows. "However, if they simply fought, that is one thing. But nearly destroying all of your shidi's spiritual veins? That, in my opinion, is too far for even a claim of self defence to cover."

Oof, Shen Qingqiu what the fuck happened in those caves!? Shen Yuan fought to keep the grimace off of his face. He'd seen that kind of brutality before. Done purposefully, there is no way to come back from the attack; a slow, mortal death awaited anyone on the receiving end. You'd only do that kind of damage by forcing your qi through someone's meridians too fast for the system to- wait a second. "That is indeed a tragedy. But I have to wonder...Shen Qingqiu, were you trying to soothe Liu Qingge's meridians? Was this malice? Or an extremely unfortunate case of medicine turned to poison under duress?"

It's all too easy to picture. Liu Qingge, gone mad in the throes of a qi deviation, stumbling upon Shen Qingqiu. In the ensuing battle, Shen Qingqiu tries to get Liu Qingge's meridians under control, but was too preoccupied with not getting run through to regulate his energy correctly and...an accident. A horrible, horrible accident. Liu Mingyan's eyes widen, coming to some kind of similar conclusion, and she turns sharply to Shen Qingqiu.

The man in question still manages to look imperious even under this new scrutiny. "The intent hardly matters in the wake of the consequences. I have already confirmed things with Disciple Liu. There is no reason to draw out the matter save for some moronic desire to overturn every stone in the quarry, dreaming of finding gold."

"Shen-gongzi is the only one making an effort to speak in your favour." Luo Binghe points out. "Shouldn't Shizun be encouraging his questions?"

Ignoring his own disciple, Shen Qingqiu glares hard at his brother. "Quite frankly, your questions do little but cast more mud into already disturbed waters when you should only wait for them to clear on their own."

What arrogance! Qingqiu, don't you know that this trial would've absolutely ruined you without your stupid brother getting involved? Shen Yuan works his jaw silently behind his fan.

"Shen-shibo, is Shen-gongzi right?" Liu Mingyan asks, leaning closer. "Did you-"

That meddling old geezer butts in again. "I believe we have heard sufficient testimony on the fate of Liu Qingge."

Liu Mingyan clearly looks ready to refute this, but Shen Qingqiu ignores her, too. He sniffs delicately and picks at the hem of his robe. "Yes, onto the demon conspiracy, correct?"

"It is rather cut and dry, I'm afraid." The Old Palace Master sighs, looking for all the world like a put upon wife. "At Jin Lan City, a horde of Sowers were unleashed upon the entire town, resulting in a months' long plague and countless commoner deaths and permanent injuries. When finally cornered, mostly by my disciple Luo Binghe here, a sower begged Shen Qingqiu to remember their deal together and to spare its life."

Being the most recent event, there wasn't much surprise from the crowd. They were already quite familiar with all of the gossip surrounding Jin Lan City. That didn't stop the brave few from increasing their mutterings. "What scum," "How can he sit there so unbothered?" "I wouldn't be surprised if it turned out Shen Qingqiu was a demon himself." "Hah! Too fitting!"

Shen Yuan does his best to tune them all out, his jaw flexing. "Alright, and where is this star witness for questioning?"

"All of the sowers were promptly incinerated to prevent another plague breaking out, Cultivator Shen. You understand." The Old Palace Master demurs.

"You-" ah, a headache is quickly building, "but surely you thoroughly questioned this demon for more answers, yes?"

"And deny the tired, wronged citizens of Jin Lan City their justice for even a moment longer? No, certainly not. No matter our own imperatives, we as cultivators are meant to serve the common people. To bring them justice where they would not see it otherwise. They needed to see the arbiters of their suffering dead."

The gold shining off of every surface of the atrium paints the old man's face in an artificial ethereal light. Shen Yuan scowls fiercely, reminded viscerally of why he hates the broader Jianghu so much. "Do you have any other evidence that Shen Qingqiu was working with the demons in Jin Lan City?" He hisses.

The Old Palace Master frowns, stroking at his beard. "Certainly. He was observed sneaking about from the minute he arrived. Abandoning his sect to conduct his own 'investigation'. Hours each day where he could coordinate the final attack on the city. We tried to ask Shen Qingqiu questions directly ahead of the trial, but, ah, he remained uncooperative."

He can't help it. He really, really can't! Shen Yuan barks out a laugh. "Is that all? He investigates on his own and no one considers that he may actually be investigating? The job he was sent there to do?"

"His reputation-"

"Doesn't matter!" He cuts the old bag of wind off harshly. "This is meant to be a fair court, and yet, at every single turn all that's been provided for proof of Shen Qingqiu's misdeeds is patchwork testimony, misattributed skepticism, and wild speculation! Do you seriously hold the word of some demon on death's door above one of the top cultivators in your society?"

The Old Palace Master's frown morphs into a look of utter pity. "As a rogue cultivator, you may not be as familiar with how things work for those of us in sects. Your conduct in society does a great deal to colour-"

"Answer my question, Old Palace Master." Shen Yuan spits.

"I was getting to it. Honestly, the new generation is so impatient." The Old Palace Master sighs and his whole chest heaves. "When one is on the verge of death, that is often when one is the most honest. Anyone would want to be fully understood in their final moments."

Shen Yuan forces himself to take a breath. His fist is clenched so hard over the guard of his fan that he can hear the spines creak as he literally shakes with rage. "You cannot have it both ways." He says, cold. "Are demons less than livestock or are they people looking to be understood?"

"Is this related?"

"Yes! Because this is yet more proof of your own hypocrisy! Where avenging massacres are a matter of course if its killing demons, yet only ever a tragedy with humans. Where you condemn and look down on those beneath you from one side of your mouth then insist you only exist to help and serve them with the other!" Shen Yuan advances on the Old Palace Master with each word. He needs to know exactly where these accusations are being thrown. "Where you drag a man to trial over something as petty as a poor reputation because he happens to be a self-aggrandizing prick. Taking the absolute worst view of events simply because, ah! He's just a low beast! Of course he's the one who bit down on your hand, no matter that his teeth don't match the wound! He's a dirty slave who dared to become powerful and you just can't fucking stand it!"

The elderly man's face has cycled through red, green, black, and is now bubbling up in a brilliant purple. "Cultivator Shen-!" He hisses like he's reprimanding a child.

Shen Yuan spins on his heel to address the now-silent audience. "What's more believable? That a cultivator would conspire with demons to create a horrid plague—to what end? To eventually have Cang Qiong assigned to the case? To eventually turn on his conspirators and net points for killing them and saving the city? They're the number one sect! They don't need help finding work or prestige! Or! The much simpler idea that, shock of all shocks, someone lied to make Cang Qiong lose face! Either way we'll never know because you killed off the fucking witness!"

Now that he's going, he can't stop. "If you really cared about trying Shen Qingqiu for his crimes you'd do everything in your power to make the case as air tight as possible. Not throw some grand production with flimsy, emotional testimony so you can all pat yourselves on the back for pretending to go through the proper motions and for coming to a decision you'd already made years ago about his innocence or guilt! We've got one more accusation don't we? Well, let's take it away already! Shen Qingqiu is an irredeemable pervert and preys on his young disciples." He marches across the platform to where the youngest members of Qing Jing are sitting. "Look! We have two of them right here, so, Ning Yingying, Luo Binghe, is your Shizun a horrible lecher? Be honest! We're all listening!"

The whole atrium has lost its voice. Ning Yingying has blanched brighter than bone. Her eyes search the platform before coming to rest on Luo Binghe. The protagonist, meanwhile, has his perfect brow furrowed. His star-filled eyes burning brightly in the same was as meteors right before they strike the ground. He takes in a breath and his mouth opens, a wry, ugly smile pulling up at his lips but-

Ning Yingying places her hand feather soft over Luo Binghe's and he startles. She closes her eyes, her lips thin and bloodless with how tightly she's pressed them together. "No," she says. In the quiet of the atrium it echoes more than a shout. "No, my Shizun has only ever treated me with fatherly kindness."

The audience erupts in whispers. Their faces slack jawed and wide eyed. Shen Yuan smirks, turning to look his brother in the eyes. I'll take that thank you any day now.

It's not over yet, idiot, Shen Qingqiu glares back.

"But," Ning Yingying's soft voice still cuts through the noise as cleanly as any spiritual weapon. "But...he did not show the same kindness to my shidi and shixiongs." Luo Binghe stiffens next to her, shifting forward on his knees to stand. She pulls him right back down to her side, their hands still intertwined. "My Shizun is a harsh man. It's well known his punishments and discipline are especially gruelling. But I understand reputation and here say is fallible. For my evidence, my beloved shidi Luo Binghe is all anyone needs to see. I'm sure that's why he was willing to help with the scan earlier, his own meridians would match with Shen-gongzi's. He was assumed dead after the Immortal Alliance Conference, despite being the first in the rankings for all of the young cultivators. And then, when it turns out he's not dead, he returns to Huan Hua, not Cang Qiong.

"For a long time, I didn't want to see how my Shizun treated my shidi. I didn't want to understand it, so I didn't. I didn't want to know about the lashes, the chores, the woodshed, how much he struggled and suffered under the man I loved like a father, all of it. But..." She takes a deep breath and even though she doesn't look at Qiu Haitang, it's clear she's addressing the other woman. "I refuse to turn away from it any more. Luo Binghe left Cang Qiong because Qing Jing wasn't safe for him. It wasn't ever safe for him there."

Shen Yuan is, honestly, speechless. His rage has frozen in place and he feels bereft in its absence. The abuse itself isn't shocking, he'd read thousands upon thousands of words about it with his own eyes. But he hadn't expected it to be brought up at the trial. In the original novel, Luo Binghe's abuse hadn't been addressed anywhere public. It was only ever used in narration to justify his newest desire or in private to sympathize with a bruised flower. The protagonist himself looks even more surprised. His hand going tight around Ning Yingying's. There's something a little manic about his eyes, an panic carved deep into his heart that makes his face look a whole decade younger. Cracked open.

Shen Yuan had bared his own past willingly. For Luo Binghe, he'd been unwittingly stripped down to the core and shown around to make a point. It's a vulnerability the protagonist probably hasn't had to face in many years. Ah, Shen Yuan thinks, how like Ning Yingying. The girl digs holes no matter the yard, it seems. He can relate.

Shen Qingqiu makes an odd noise, not quite a scoff but stronger than a sigh. "What, nothing to say to that emotional testimony, Cultivator Shen?"

Jiu-ge, really, just shut up already. Shen Yuan flicks his fan open to hide the curl of his lip. "I believe I've made my stance on child abuse perfectly clear, Peak Lord Shen."

The Old Palace Master starts making noises and shuffling his sleeves around, still clinging onto some fake control of the trial he hasn't had since it began. "There, you see? It's clear to all that-"

"That's enough." A low, steady voice calls from the audience. Yue Qingyuan is standing proud among the other peak lords. He's smiling, but he still looks hollow. "This trial—this production—is over. We're done here."

Shen Shi has a plan. He may not have expected to start his plan from…here, but…it'll have to do. He peels himself away from the divan, wincing at all the ways his muscles pull under his skin. His breaths come short and he has to pause, kneeling on the floor, before he can continue.

He knows his brother is close to snapping. And, to be honest, a darker part of Shen Shi is nearing his own edge. But Shen Jiu's edge has always been sharper than Shen Shi's, he has to act before his brother does. If they had to hide from soldiers looking for a murderer it'd be a pain. It'd be better for everyone if it just appeared that they'd died. Then they'd be free to get back to Qi-ge and figure out how to live their lives on their own time. It'd have to be believable though. This is why, as Shen Shi struggles to his feet in Qiu Jianluo's side room, he eyes the hearth.

Qiu Jianluo is a man burdened by comfort. Even at the height of summer humidity, he insisted on keeping the hearths stocked with materials just in case he wanted to light a fire at night. In case he wanted to burn something or someone, more likely. Shen Shi is well acquainted with the poker.

The mansion is made primarily of lacquered wood. It wouldn't start to burn until the fire gets hot enough so he needs a good starter. Thankfully, the divan is draped in silk blankets with fine threaded detailing. He rips the offending items into long strips and spirals them around the room. Wrapping them around pieces of furniture before finally leading the head of the strand to the hearth.

Admittedly, Shen Shi is not an experienced arsonist. The fire spreads much quicker than he anticipates.

He stumbles, blind and lungs burning through the estate. "GEGE!" He shouts, straining his ears to try and listen for his twin amidst all of the panicked servants running wild. Some are trying to stop the blaze, but others are just running. Even more are bleeding, their eyes unseeing as they trail screaming from the estate.

"There he is!" Someone calls.

Shen Shi turns only once the sound of hurried feet slapping against stone is clearly coming straight for him and then there's-

He must black out a bit. He blinks back to himself laying flat on his back, the snarling face of the chef overhead while his left arm feels completely numb. There's a sword blade cutting into his shoulder. The chef's right ear is hanging from his head by a wet strip of skin. He's covered in blood, gashes running across his forearms and when his fingers clench around Shen Shi's throat he can feel a few missing.

"Shen Jiu you wretched beast! I'm not letting you get away again! Die! DIE!"

Wrong one! Wrong one! Shen Shi gasps to try and let the chef know but saliva burbles in his throat and steals away his words. He scrapes his nails against the chef's arms, trying to dig into the wounds already there. The man snarls and pushes the kid harder into the ground.

The smoke swirls harshly in the air. It makes everything look spotty, unreal. Or, maybe his vision is just going out? It's hard to tell. His lungs were already burning but now they're searing two giant holes through his chest and, heavens, it hurts. Everything's hurt since he got to this shitty world. There hasn't been even one break from the agony which—he supposes makes sense. This is Proud Immortal Demon's Way, after all.

But it hurts. It really hurts, and he doesn't like it.

Tears spill out of unseeing eyes and Shen Shi wishes he'd gotten to meet the protagonist at least. Luo Binghe would be able to go through all of this and then get up and keep going, rising to new and brighter heights. Shen Shi doesn't know if he could do that. Because Luo Binghe is the favoured son of heaven and Shen Shi is just—less. In all ways, less.

Ah, but he really wants to see Luo Binghe. He wants his Jiu-ge to pick at his hair again. He wants his Qi-ge to gently lie about waking someone else up for watch. He wants-!

Shen Shi shoves what little qi he has up and through the chef, tracing the stagnant paths inside the older man until he can find his heart and force those still streams of life energy wide open to tear it apart from the inside.

Air falls back into his throat in a rush as the chef spasms and collapses off to the side. Shen Shi coughs hard, everything burning, burning, but he's done it. He's survived. He clutches at his throat and stares at the still-twitching body of the chef. Something hot is building in his chest but he has to- there's no time to sit and cry and sob on the floor. He has to find his brother.

It takes some work, but he pries the sword free, and now he's armed.

He stumbles through the manor, calling out, and cutting down anyone who gets too close or looks too mad. Their deaths don't matter. It won't matter once he can find Shen Jiu and they can get out together and leave all of this behind. He ignores the blood overwhelming the stench of smoke and the growing trail of viscera in his wake, it doesn't matter.

He searches until the red lacquer starts melting off the wooden beams and mixing with the pools of blood soaking under mangled corpses. There's more bodies than Shen Shi thought he'd killed, but, thinking is pretty hard at the moment. He's very aware he could be missing things. Facts about smoke inhalation and fire safety flit across his mind and leave distracting sparks in their wake. He blinks hard to try and clear them away, but if anything they start shining brighter.

By the time the building begins to groan and collapse, Shen Shi is forced to abandon his search. He falls back to the surrounding forests and watches for any other shapes to come stumbling out of the blaze. He notes some maids, a few of the stable boys. But he doesn't see Shen Jiu. He keeps watching as Qiu Manor burns to the ground.

With the air clearer, his mind clears too. The blood has gone tacky where it's splashed along his body. It makes his skin feel tight whenever he shuffles a little. He's reminded of the names and faces of the people he killed slowly. A spool of thread going lax and spilling upwards. His stomach feels cold. He can't bring himself to regret it. Not when he's still breathing, out in the forest. Not when he gets to watch his own personal hell crumble into ash with his own eyes. But then, where is Shen Jiu?

When the fire has died back to almost nothing late in the next day, he goes picking through the ashes. There are plenty of bodies to look over, but none of them are his brother. He's sure there are more hidden under the heavier pieces of building that he can't get into. One of those is Qiu Jianluo's study. He tries his best, but the ash is slippery and the wood is much too heavy for him to lift. He's sure Shen Jiu is in there. Qiu Jianluo too, probably. Are they buried together?

Ah.

He sinks down into the dirt. He'd done that. Locked them together forever.

Shen Shi doesn't really remember the next few days. He knows he'd scrounged together some scorched clothes and a bit of food and water only because he has those things with him around his camp fire. He's gotten much better with controlling a blaze, at least! He doesn't have to go to bed cold anymore! He might've levelled up, then!

-

He's maybe 18 when he gets his first "disciple". Shen Shi never finds a formal master himself. But he knows roughly what cultivation is supposed to look and feel like based on all of the xianxia web novels he'd read religiously in his past life. Not to mention, he seems to have a much stronger sense of his qi and how to push and pull it to his will than the average person. Still, any of the major sects worth their salt were pits of abuse and back stabbing. He'd briefly considered going to Cang Qiong to try and run into Binghe, but that'd mean he'd have to deal with the scum villain, Shen Qingqiu, and he just- no. It's barely been two years since Qiu manor burned. He's in no hurry to jump into another one. Maybe later but...not now.

So he keeps his distance and sticks to civilian towns. He picks up work where he can. Apothecaries can earn a pretty penny, apparently! He can put his knowledge of the world and his qi manipulation to good work that way. Maybe it's because he promotes himself as a travelling apothecary rather than cultivator that he starts to attract a different kind of attention.

An older man marches right up to him and demands Shen Shi prepare a poultice for good skin. "Bao Kun here is finally making herself useful and needs to make a good impression." The man says.

It's then that Shen Shi notices a young girl at the man's side. Maybe 10, but with how thin and ragged she is she appears younger. The familiar curling shape of a slave brand peeks out from her collar. Ah.

He invites the man and Bao Kun back to his camp to create the medicine. Of course, he kills the man—he'd been too self-important to recognize the danger before it's too late. Bao Kun doesn't scream, but she eyes Shen Shi with open fear.

He gets down on his knees and smiles at her, keeping a good distance. "Do you have any family?"

She doesn't answer.

"Any friends waiting for you back in the city? I can get you back to them. I'll leave you with some money. I can't get rid of the brand, not completely, but I can make it less obvious. You deserve a chance at a real life."

Bao Kun swallows loudly. But her eyes harden. "Are you a cultivator? That's how you did it, right? How you killed him just by touching him?"

"Something like that." He says.

"What's your name?" She asks.

He usually dodges these kinds of questions where he can, just in case there really are any soldiers out looking for him, but she deserves honesty. "Shen Shi, though please call me Shen Yuan."

"Could you teach me to do that?"

He tries to persuade her against it, but she's as unmovable as a mountain, which makes sense given her name. Clearly her parents had known she'd be stubborn. This is how he gets his first disciple.

Sometimes he has one, sometimes as many as five, sometimes none. They come and go as they please and he doesn't have anything close to a true curriculum. But the kids he finds need a fire at night and he's more than ready to provide. He keeps hoping he'll run into Shen Jiu and Yue Qi doing the same thing he is. But on all of his travels he hears nothing of either. By ten years since the manor burned, they're an old ache in his chest. But his disciples need him more than their memory does.

By twenty years, he's given up the pretence and just calls himself a rogue cultivator. He may not be all that strong, but he's gotten used to the road and those that travel it. He doesn't have friends per se, but he knows people. He's warm every night. And sometimes he rids the world of polite monsters that people prefer to ignore. He wouldn't say he's lonely or anything, but his disciples tell him he gets a bit too quiet sometimes. He always snarks back that he's only thinking, something they could stand to do some more of! That usually ends the conversations.

-

After running Qiu Jianluo through once, then a few more times for good measure, Shen Jiu takes his time carving his way out of the manor. As soon as he out, he sets the old woodshed on fire and chucks burning logs through the delicate paper windows of the manor. He runs immediately, hanging off into the woods and watching for Shen Shi.

Some of the guards he hadn't managed to stab all the way through come stumbling his way so he falls back to the next town over. He lingers for three days, but he doesn't see his twin anywhere. If he doesn't leave, he'll lose his chance at cultivating. So, he sets up a small tablet on a scrap of wood and plants it at the edge of town. He prays for his brother's spirit to make it through reincarnation smoothly and that's all there is to it.

Shen Jiu follows Wu Yanze long enough to pick up what he needs and then he cuts that line as fast as he can. He's not keen on letting anyone hold power over him, especially when it's only the two of them travelling together. A sect is the next best place. There, he can amass power as he pleases, and once he's powerful enough, he'll never have to worry about being without ever again.

He gathers information on everything he can find. He makes a name for himself on Qing Jing and takes vicious satisfaction whenever that bothersome lout from Qiong Ding gets banned from the peak by the Qing Jing Peak Lord.

He knows he doesn't have Shen Shi to watch his back anymore, but he forgets more often than he would ever admit out loud. Shen Jiu throws himself into fights head first. Only realizing halfway through that he'll still have to outsmart his opponent or else trudge over to Qian Cao and submit himself to someone else's power since Shen Shi won't be able to heal his wounds afterwards. Eventually he starts reminding himself of this before the fights even begin. His strategic mind comes in handy when Yue Qingyuan makes a name for himself in the sealing of Tianlang-Jun.

Shen Qingqiu makes his own name for himself by carving away everything unnecessary until only a peerless jade of an immortal sits in his place. Shen Qingqiu does not grieve. Shen Qingqiu does not reminisce on "what could have been". Shen Qingqiu doesn't have time to be soft to spoiled prodigies dreaming only of a cushy life. Shen Qingqiu is the Peak Lord of Qing Jing and that is simply all there is to it.

Shen Jiu is dead. He's buried in a too-small hole curled up with Shen Shi and watched over by Yue Qi.

Shen Qingqiu remains. He is comfortable. He wants for nothing. He dresses in fine clothes he picks for himself and dedicates his time to mastering his own appearance. A soft voice he'll never hear again often asks him if he's happy here. He scowls and tells the voice that happiness has never been part of the equation. That's all there is to it.

Once Yue Qingyuan puts his foot down everything starts falling into place on its own. Which means it's time for Shen Yuan to get the hell out of dodge! He's done what he came here for and has no intention of being grilled any further about the Qiu's. While everyone else is busy watching the Old Palace Master and Yue Qingyuan argue very politely about the trial and volleying very obvious threats back and forth, Shen Yuan sneaks out of the atrium as casually as he can.

Just getting out of the room itself does wonders for his stress levels. He can feel all the weight of the past few hours literally melt from his shoulders with a shuddering sigh. He starts winding his way back out of the gilded maze that is Huan Hua when a cold voice pins him in place.

"Shen-gongzi, I was hoping to catch you for a minute. I'd like to talk." Luo Binghe says, standing with perfectly polite posture. His eyes curved up into little slits. Even though he's smiling so sweetly, Shen Yuan knows just how sharp the teeth are behind those lips! Fuck! Fuck fuck fuck! He should've known the protagonist would noticed him leaving!

"Young master Luo, I must admit, I didn't expect any company." Shen Yuan replies as evenly as he can manage. Hoping to throw the other off of whatever he's planning, Shen Yuan clears his throat lightly and gentles his expression. "Are you doing alright? You looked a bit ill at the end there."

Luo Binghe's smile falls ever so slightly, he looks off to the side, his long lashes brushing his cheeks. He looks...almost shy? A bit like a scorned girlfriend. Which, what!? "This one was surprised by Yingying's testimony is all. Not to mention all the things said about my old Shizun and your...rather impassioned speech. You'd agree today was very taxing."

Shen Yuan is still reeling a bit from this bashful act. He clicks his tongue and forces his mind to clear. "Yes, well, I was expecting it to get a bit heated. Apologies if I caused you any offence young master Luo."

"Please, just Luo Binghe is fine. Since today was so long, Huan Hua would be all too happy to put you up in a room for you to recover tonight." The protagonist takes a step forward.

And wake up to an arrest warrant? No thank you! "That's alright. I'm well equipped to make camp on the road." Shen Yuan says, taking one step back.

Luo Binghe looks up through his lashes at the older man and Shen Yuan nearly has a heart attack on the spot. Those starry eyes are big and dark, the kind of void that would love nothing more than to draw in everything around it. He's very tempted to fall in. "If Shen-gongzi is worried about being tried for his confessions today, please rest assured, no harm will come to you. This lowly one will make sure of it." He's shuffles forward a few more steps.

"That's- very kind of you, Luo Binghe, but, really," Shen Yuan steps back until his heel bumps into the raised edge of a pond. "I should be going."

"Are you running away from Shen Qingqiu?" Luo Binghe asks. As lightly as one might ask about the weather.

Fan! Shelter this impulsive idiot with your paper-y might! "Respectfully, that is none of your business."

Another step closer. "Ah, but, this one couldn't help but notice that my old Shizun was very surprised to see you. As I imagine you were to see him. With how thoroughly you defended him in the trial, one can't help but wonder why you'd delay your picture perfect reunion."

Shen Yuan ducks behind his fan as much as he can, his eyes narrow slightly over its edge. He draws himself up to his full height—which is, as expected, still shorter than the protagonist—and begins to channel his lofty immortal persona. "I came to Huan Hua to make the fate of Qiu manor known. That is all. I only stayed because it seemed no one else would dare to acknowledge how flimsy the whole thing was."

Luo Binghe smiles again and, honestly, it should be illegal to have a face like that. "How righteous. Would you truly defend anyone in that same way?"

Shen Yuan bites his tongue to keep his mouth shut. The protagonist is trying to spin his words around into something much more impressive than he really is. That being: Shen Yuan is simply a pedantic hater. He's only pretending to be a lofty immortal, words like "righteous" don't actually apply.

"Would you step in and speak up for the lowest of the low?" Luo Binghe moves forward, crowding into the other's space. "Scum, murderers, scoundrels, those wretched animals deemed intolerable to the heavens?"

This close, Shen Yuan can count each hair on Luo Binghe's head. His heart is going wild in his chest, they can't be allowed to touch! That'd be a deaths sentence. The reasonable thing to do would be to bat away the protagonist's questions and make a break for it. But those words strike up against Shen Yuan's sense of justice and he can't stop himself from responding. "Honestly," he huffs, "what are you even saying? I'm not so altruistic as to stop traffic to let a cricket cross the road. But that doesn't mean I think the cricket deserves to get run over. There is nothing in this world or the next intolerable to the heavens."

"That's quite a claim." Luo Binghe muses softly. "Alright, let's speak honestly as two men."

Shen Yuan frowns but nods his assent all the same.

Like flipping a switch, the smile falls off of Luo Binghe's face. His shoulders square back only a little, but he seems suddenly much more imposing. "I don't know where you came from, Shen Yuan. You've messed up my trial very efficiently. I'll admit, it was rushed. Forgive me, I left it up to my superiors here in Huan Hua just this once. But let me be clear. The only reason I have not hauled you off to the Water Prison to let off some steam is that you piqued my interest."

Oh, fuck. Shen Yuan's grip around his fan is getting concerningly tight. He has to lean back to keep from brushing chests with the other man. "Your honesty is a change of pace. Putting aside everything else, I suppose I should ask the question you want me to ask. What about me caught your eye?"

"A few things. Your insistence on the personhood of demons, for one. You should be more careful when saying things like that. Some people might get the wrong idea." Luo Binghe chuckles like he'd said something funny. "For another, you made no attempt at absolving your twin brother of his crimes against me."

"I believe I already explained my reasonings for that in the trial. It wasn't personal." It kind of was, but the young demon lord standing way way WAY too close doesn't need to know that!

"Maybe so," Luo Binghe allows, finally taking a step back. He's still much too close, but at least Shen Yuan can breathe now. "Then I suppose you won't mind when I say that I have every intention of paying back ten fold what I received on Qing Jing. You must understand my feelings well."

"It would be a lie if I said I didn't. Though, since we're speaking honestly to each other, will you listen if I tell you what I've learned from my own vengeance?"

Luo Binghe tilts his head, his eyes shining now like garnets. Bits of red bleeding into his starry skies.

Shen Yuan takes that for a yes and nods to himself. "If I could return to any point in time to relive my life, I would go back and burn down Qiu manor every time. I must stand by all of the decisions I've made, to do otherwise would mean that I want to see me, as I exist now, dead and gone. I could never shame you or tell you not to seek closure. But I have to ask, what will you do once you're done? Me, even all these years later, I can't bring myself to settle. I'm restless and adrift. My revenge has brought me closure, but not happiness. Certainly not affection."

"I am not you." Luo Binghe says slowly.

"And the world is better for it." Shen Yuan says. "Just think about it. If what you want is really to see your enemy brought low, or if you just want to stop feeling small."

Faster than he can react, Luo Binghe grabs his collar and yanks Shen Yuan forward. The young demon lord's face is no more than a sheet of ice. Pristine, and cold. "You have quite the tongue. Is that all?"

A chilly sweat beads up along Shen Yuan's hairline. He chances a look down at where the protagonist's hand is buried in the fabric of his robes. Did that count? Is this touch? Is the System booting up? "Apologies," he breathes, "you remind me of some of my disciples, is all. We talk about similar things."

Unceremoniously, Luo Binghe lets go. Shen Yuan rears back in relief but he'd already been so close to the edge of the pond that his balance is off. He can feel himself falling. He flails, "shit!" Before he can go toppling head first into the pond, a strong hand snatches his wrist and pulls him back.

[Connection to main power source <Luo Binghe> complete! Boot sequence initiating...]

More emphatically, "shit."

As if things couldn't get worse, that's when a certain self-aggrandizing prick makes his entrance. "Let him go, beast."

Luo Binghe turns and Shen Yuan gets a perfect view of Shen Qingqiu making a great impression of a lightning storm blowing their way with Yue Qingyuan trailing after him as serious as thunder.

Shen Yuan pulls his own wrist free and takes the opportunity to take several large steps off to the side, landing in the middle between disciple and master. "I'm fine." He says. Chancing a look at the bright blue System window now floating at his side he grimaces.

[System boot in progress...3%]

[...4%]

[...5%]

Shen Qingqiu finishes sweeping dramatically into the little garden they've taken over, his eyes cool as he flicks them between his brother and the protagonist. "Good. Let's go. We have a long flight ahead of us."

"And who is we?" Shen Yuan asks.

Shen Qingqiu stares at him. The are you stupid? doesn't need to be said out loud to be heard.

"The three of us, like old times." Yue Qingyuan offers. He's back to smiling and he almost looks like Qi-ge. But there's something new about him that throws it all off. Some kind of anticipation. Shen Yuan doesn't know if Yue Qingyuan is actually seeing him even as the older man looks right at him. "I for one would like to catch up somewhere more comfortable. Would you like that, Xiao Shi?"

"Don't call him that."

"Don't call me that."

The twins each take a second to glare at the other. It's been a long time since Shen Yuan has accidentally spoken at the same time as another. Clearing his throat, he tries again. "As I said, I go by Shen Yuan now. So please use that name. And while that sounds nice, I have my own life to resettle. Perhaps another time."

Shen Qingqiu sighs. "If you're going to make excuses, they could at least be good ones. This isn't something that can be handled another time. Now, let's go."

[...27%]

The arrogance...just like reading it for the first time, it's Shen Qingqiu's arrogance that pisses Shen Yuan off the most. Still, when the System finishes booting, Shen Yuan is toast. And as much as Shen Qingqiu pisses Shen Yuan off, he really doesn't want his brother to see him collapse dead on the spot. So, he stands firm. "I'm not going to Cang Qiong with you. I did what I came here to do, so now I need to go check in on everything I dropped in a hurry to get here."

Shen Qingqiu scowls fiercely so Yue Qingyuan interrupts again. "If it's already been waiting a few days, a few more can't hurt. If you need to send letters letting anyone know where you are or why you're delayed, I would be more than happy to corroborate them."

Luo Binghe decides he's been ignored and chimes in as well. "If he does not want to go with you, why force the matter?"

"Why are you still here?" Shen Qingqiu sneers. "Don't you have some powerful sect leader to ingratiate yourself to and eventually overthrow?"

"You're the one who is interrupting Shen Yuan and I's conversation, Shizun." Luo Binghe smiles back.

[...35%]

"Luo Binghe, it's fine." Shen Yuan cuts in before either of them can snipe at each other some more. "Think about what we talked about. This next conversation is private. It was nice to meet you."

The protagonist looks at him for a good few seconds. Then his smile grows and he's back to the perfect, polite Huan Hua initiate. "Of course. A pleasure to make your acquaintance Cultivator Shen."

With that, it's just Shen Yuan, Shen Qingqiu, and Yue Qingyuan in the little garden together. As soon as Luo Binghe is far enough away, Shen Qingqiu marches forward and bodily shakes his twin violently by the shoulders. "What on earth were you thinking!" He hisses. "Of all the stupid, half-baked, inane plans-!"

"Yes, yes, I get it!" Shen Yuan says, breaking away from his brother's grip. "I'll take a thank you any moment now, by the way. If I hadn't made use of my stupid, half-baked, inane plan, you'd be well on your way to the execution block by now."

[...41%]

"Oh, please. Anyone with half a brain would have thrown out those accusations."

Shen Yuan can feel his headache returning. "Are you serious? They were out for your blood! All of them! It doesn't matter if they believe or don't believe the accusations, as long as they had plausible deniability they'd be all too glad to push you into a spike pit!"

Shen Qingqiu doesn't roll his eyes, but it's a near thing. "Yes, this master is well aware of that. Had you even considered that I may also have had a plan for the trial?"

"Let me guess," he knows he's being mean, but Shen Yuan can't stop himself, "you were going to sit there looking proud and snidely condescend to everyone at every possible opportunity as if that'd magically get anyone on your side."

"If you mean uphold the image of an immortal cultivator Peak Lord instead of throwing a childish tantrum in front of the entire cultivation world, then yes." Shen Qingqiu sniffs.

"Oh for the love of-! How hard is it to say thank you!?" Shen Yuan throws his arms wide.

His twin is curled up tight, his arms crossed and chin lifted to a perfect point. "I'll consider expressing gratitude when you get over this farce and come to Qing Jing with me. We have much to catch up on, and I have no intention of letting you slip away from me again."

[...59%]

He's running out of time, he doesn't have time for this! "I'm not going back to Qing Jing with you! How could I? How could I possibly follow you there when you've turned what should be a haven for learning into another elaborate manor of lies?"

Shen Qingqiu lashes out and Shen Yuan blocks the blow with his fan. "You dare," Shen Qingqiu hisses.

"I do dare when you throw your youngest disciple in a fucking woodshed! Shen Jiu, really?"

"I may be a harsh teacher, but I am not Qiu Jianluo. I would never-" whatever he wants to say can't make its way out of his throat. Shen Qingqiu swallows hard and then pins his twin in place with his snarl. "This world is a dismal place. It would sooner kill those pathetic children than it would treat them with any amount of dignity. If they cannot find the strength to pry a place in this world and defend it, then better they learn with me than anyone else."

Shen Yuan grins and he knows it's ugly. "Ah, yes, it's for their own good. Where have I heard that one before?"

"What would you know about teaching unruly pre-teens! I'd love to see you do better."

"Plenty! I've taught a few dozen of my own without ever raising my hand against them and wouldn't you know it, they trust and like me and stay in contact after they're done learning." Shen Yuan barks out a harsh laugh. "A crazy concept, I know. That students may actually like their teacher. You might understand it if you weren't such an arrogant piece of shit!"

[...72%]

Shen Qingqiu draws back, a mottled flush along his neck the only sign that he's bothered. His face is carefully locked down into neutral disdain. Yue Qingyuan looks close to heart broken behind him. Shen Qingqiu assesses his twin cooly. "Then why defend me if you detest me so deeply?"

Shen Yuan bites down hard on his tongue until he can taste blood. Fighting with his brother hasn't gotten him any closer to being able to run off and die in peace. It's so tempting to keep trading barbs and cuts until they're both bleeding and hurt and vulnerable. But if these are his last seconds with his brothers, he doesn't want them to be fighting. So he swallows down his pride. Shen Yuan's thin face has already taken plenty of beatings today, but it doesn't make it easier to bear it again in private. Maybe the audience actually helped? That way he could play a role instead of having to face himself in all of his ugly, twisted glory.

Shen Yuan wets his lips. "I didn't want my memory of my Jiu-ge to be trampled over and handed off to someone else. That's why I came. I didn't want my gege to be forgotten in service of some idiotic intra-sect agenda. I didn't know you'd become Shen Qingqiu. And when I saw you...I had to jump in. I missed you."

He's not sure what specifically makes it through, but Shen Qingqiu's mask loosens. His brows curve together almost gently. "Then come with me. What ever happened to together or not at all?"

[...93%]

Shen Yuan feels like that old hot thing that had buried in his chest after the fire stir. It makes his skin feel tight and his nose burn. "We've been on our own for almost three decades, Jiu-ge. I'm not- I can't just slot right back into place like nothing's happened. I can't be whisked away and kept."

Shen Qingqiu openly flinches back. His lower lip sterns to keep it from betraying any more emotions most likely. "I don't understand the sentiment. But if it's only space, I can spare it."

"I think we both need some space." Shen Yuan says. "Space and time. But I need you to know, I love you Jiu-ge. I do. It's hard to like you and harder to love you but I do."

Shen Qingqiu's eyes close gently. "We will exchange letters. You will respond as soon as you can. When you come to visit, you will stay in the room I prepare." Even now, he can't say 'I love you' back, but Shen Yuan can still hear echoes of it.

"Letters I can do. I make no promises about visiting. I mean it. I have no intention of going to Qing Jing as it is now."

"Qiong Ding is always-" Yue Qingyuan tries.

"No." Shen Yuan doesn't want Yue Qingyuan giving out yet another loop hole for Shen Qingqiu. "If you want me in your life, then you have to do better." A bit misleading given he had maybe a few minutes of life left, but that's his own problem to worry about.

Shen Qingqiu looks ready to argue again, but clicks his teeth and looks sharply away. "Letters, then." He says thinly.

Something cold and bitter lodges itself in Shen Yuan's throat. So, that's how it'd be. "Letters," he agrees.

They don't say goodbye, both of them are much too awkward for that. Instead Shen Qingqiu simply nods and turns to swish back out the way he came.

Yue Qingyuan lingers behind for a brief moment, looking for all the world like he's got something to say too. In the end, though, he falls back into an empty smile and a soft, "never mind. Goodbye, Xiao Yuan."

Once they're both out of sight, Shen Yuan sinks hard into the grass.

[...99%]

The number stares back at him almost mockingly. He braces himself by falling into a meditative pose. He feels a bit bad for lying about the letters, but it's drowned out by his relief to be away from prying eyes.

[...100%]

[Initializing...]

[Welcome to System version 2.0 (,; ⩌ ;,) ! It's been a while User 02! This System will now tally up what you've been up to while it was on standby mode. Please wait while this System reviews your life and decisions ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧]

Alright, System! Do your worst! This miserable old man is ready for the big chop! He's said his piece and more so whenever you're ready!

[...]

[...]

[...]

[Most recent quest: Reject the Blood and Shame the Scum complete! +500 B-points. For your role in the Main Event <A Trial for the Ages> you've earned +3,000 B-points. You've also earned +1,000 Protagonist Satisfaction Points for ridiculing the Scum Villain <Shen Qingqiu> in <Luo Binghe>'s earshot! Wow! (,,>ヮ<,,) Keep up the good work, User 02! You'll turn this novel full of holes into a <First Rate Classic> in no time!]

Shen Yuan stares at the text but it doesn't make any more sense than when it'd first appeared in front of him. All of his fear and anger has fallen straight out of him. He's...not dead? He's being rewarded? He should be happy, shouldn't he? To still be alive, at least. To have gotten away with all his ridiculous plans and come out the other side on top.

He'd won, hadn't he?

As the System keeps counting, Shen Yuan watches his point total jump up and down as every dirty and mundane thing he's ever done in this world is tallied up and scored.

Luo Binghe was right. Today has been extremely taxing. And Shen Yuan has to continue through it into tomorrow. Into more complications and hurt and problems. Ah, his old bones can't take all of this, seriously!

Shen Yuan leaves Huan Hua without fanfare and sets up his camp as far down the road as he can be bothered with. The System is still counting, but based on how high his point totals are, he's fairly certain he's in the clear. He lays back to look up at the stars while his fire burns itself out. He's not sure this is a victory. But, he's alive. His brother is alive, both of them. He'd even met the protagonist of this world. Isn't that everything he'd wished for? He feels the spaces around him where the warmth of the fire doesn't reach all too keenly. Maybe not everything he'd wished for, but two out of three isn't bad.

He falls asleep under the stars, still feeling a chill and tries not to think of anything else. In the morning, he can go back to making light of his situation and pitching perfectly appropriate fits where necessary. But in the quiet of total solitude, Shen Yuan turns on his side, curls up tight, and dreams of fitting in next to someone else.