Work Text:
Honda Civic sighed. It had been years since he'd last felt the touch of a woman. Or anyone, for that matter. He'd been abandoned back in 2019, in an old Wendy's which had been too abandoned due to multiple counts of arson. It still has the meats. They never die. The scent of burgers hung in the air, as it had since that very day of July 2019.
He'd not expected much that day. But, what he really hadn't expected, was a visitor.
A beautiful, shining specimen, with fresh polished windows, and tires that seemed as though they'd been replaced only 2 seconds ago. It flabbergasted Honda Civic to see such a fresh model, after being completely deprived of seeing any other car but himself. It was Toyota RAV4.
"Hey! My GPS told me about some hot singles over here... Would that be you? Because you sure are looking hot." Toyota smirked. "With all those burns."
Blushing at the comment he was expecting, Honda Civic laughed it off. "Haha, yeah. I'm the only one here-"
Wendy Thomas, the well known fast food mascot, crawled into the scene. She giggled, then flew away.
"Whatever. Happens a lot." Civic turned away, embarrassed.
RAV4 drove closer. A bit too close. "It's fine. I like that."
Honda Civic's face exploded into a hot blush. He tried to laugh it off and back away, but there was a wall right behind him. He was pinned by RAV4's mirrors (because they stretch). "Oh?"
Giving into his impulsive thoughts, RAV4 came closer, and shoved his bumper against the others'.
"Holy smokes dude!" Civic thought, leaning into the KISS??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? Passionately. Toyota RAV4's mirrors grabbed his, and they started grinding their headlights together.
Civic's exhaust let out a loud "VRNMMMMMMMMMBRMMRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR" sound. He tried to brush it off, but the other was smirking widely.
Then, Obama came around the corner, and groaned. "WHTA THE FUXCK" then he folded over and died.
