Chapter Text
Even at the break of dawn, Tokyo never sleeps, Kanoka Amanai thought to herself as she watched the buildings blur into the colors of the sunrise. If she focused hard enough on the window instead of what was outside, she would see her own reflection: tired definitely, somewhat anxious. Mainly because of the stress she’s had moving from Miyagi to Tokyo. The prefecture’s railway system was quite confusing the first time she arrived. Miyagi did not prepare her for city life (of course, since it was far from a city in the first place-); the train lines weren't always a puzzle, everyone knew each other, it was familiar to her. She enjoyed her walks to Niiyama Joshi in the morning, where the birds would flock in the sky and the trees would rustle in the wind. The girls from her volleyball team would join her when they crossed paths along the way, laughing at jokes they made or simply enjoyed ones' company in silence. Simpler times.
But this wasn't Miyagi, this was Tokyo. Even finding her own apartment and the nearest station was a struggle. The streets were always bustling with people and the familiar birds and trees didn't sound the same, if she could hear them at all under all the sound pollution. If it wasn't for the few family members who lived near and the friends she made whenever she would go to Nationals for volleyball, she would not have been able to survive the first few months she had before university started.
Oh right. University. That was where she was headed to after all. Amanai sighed quietly and repositioned herself in her seat at the thought of it. It was a leap to have decided to apply to a university in Tokyo of all places. To be frank, she applied on a whim and didn't expect to be accepted, but on the sliver of hope she had, she wanted to branch out beyond the small world she knew. For most of her life, she had been kept safe in her little bubble, but as a result, she grew up naive and inexperienced. Being a fresh graduate from high school was the perfect opportunity to step away from that. When she found out she made it, she and all her family and friends were ecstatic and urged her to pursue the life in the city she wanted. Amanai felt the nostalgia hit her stomach remembering her friends and family back home, waving to her as she passed the ticket barrier. The memories she made, built up all those years.
A bump in the road snapped her away from her thoughts. Glancing at the sign for the next stop, she saw hers was next and prepared herself to leave, readying her bag that was in her lap and double-checking all of her belongings inside. Amanai tapped her phone to make sure she was still on schedule; it would be a 15-minute walk from the station to her class, and with the time she had left, she assured herself she'd be alright and settled with taking her time to enjoy the scenery. She was glad she decided to leave early and made a mental note to leave again around the same time tomorrow—she’d hate to rush in the morning. As the train slowed to a stop and the doors opened, she walked out and kept her phone in her hand for directions. She passed by a row of cherry blossom trees along the way and enjoyed the petals fluttering through the air, similar to the ones she would pass when she walked to school during the Spring. She smiled at the sight. A few stores selling food were open as well. Hopefully, she’ll be able to eat in one of them one day. The food smelled delicious as she passed by.
When she arrived, she was amazed at how expansive the campus was. The schools in Miyagi she toured paled in comparison to this one. Her eyes explored and familiarized her surroundings. She’d be studying here for the next 4 years, she might as well get used to it. The campus itself had a minimalist feel encapsulated in nature. The buildings itself were simple, but the trees and flowers that were planted made it less bland to look at. She knew before coming here that the student body would be large but seeing only numbers didn’t account for the feeling of actually being in the student body. It was unfamiliar territory for her and she would definitely have to get used to it; she went to an all-girls’ school, a fairly average-sized one. She sweated at the thought of having to put a front in order to make friends—she'd just have to deal with it when she got there.
By the time Amanai made it to her lecture hall, despite waking up early, it seemed like everyone else got there earlier than she did. It was a big room; if all the seats were filled, it could probably fill a good 75 people, Amanai observed. There were clusters of people who had already asserted themselves into groups of friends which gave her a tinge of jealousy. Just a tinge. All of the seats near the front—which was where she preferred to sit—were already taken, and the only spare seats were at the back. She pursed her lips and trudged along.
As she made her way up, she caught sight of a familiar face at the farthest back corner of the room; a guy with curly hair and a face mask on, disinterestedly tapping at his phone while waiting for class to start. Like he sensed Amanai's gaze, he locked eyes with her. Kiyoomi Sakusa.
It was Niiyama's match-point; they only needed one more point to win their quarter-final match against Dainohara Gakuen. One point. One point. Amanai repeated in her head 10 times over. That was all she could think of when she heard her teammate serve the ball behind her. She didn't pick up the sounds from the audience; all she could hear were the squeaking of sneakers, outbursts of "Nice serve!" from her teammates, and the beating of her own heart. She watched as the ball flew over her head and stepped forward in sync with the rest of her team. The ball was received perfectly by their libero—impressive, considering it was late game—and caught by their setter, who set to their spiker on Amanai's left. Two of Niiyama's blockers jumped up in defense, forcing the spiker to land a straight right into their own libero's arms.
This one was her's. She could feel it. Once the ball landed into her teammate's hands, Amanai stepped towards the net and jumped, her right arm ready to swing. She followed the ball as it flew towards her, but before she made contact with it, she noticed the sudden surge of pressure coming from the other side of the net. There were three blockers in her way. They were trying to kill block her.
In an act of quick thinking, she lightly tapped the ball over their towering hands. Considering she was tall herself, it was an easy feat. She saw the look on the blockers' face as she returned to the ground.
She thought she had done it. Their one point.
However, before she knew it, she saw the ball being launched back up behind the blockers she had just overcome. Their libero, once again, came in behind the blockers to save the ball. In an instant, what was once a slow-motion play began to pick up the pace, to the point where by the time she realized what had happened, the opposing setter tossed to Amanai's left again and the spiker landed their shot. It was a decisive break for Dainohara.
For the first time, she noticed the booming sound of the crowd erupting in cheers; she couldn't hear herself anymore. Amanai glanced at the scoreboard. 27 to 27. Okay, Kanoka. you still got this. Don't falter now. She readied her stance, preparing for a heavy serve from Dainohara's setter, whose serve was notorious for being difficult to receive. It had a certain spin to it that if someone angled it wrong, it would spiral out of control. She tried to calm her nerves, focusing on the sounds of sneakers, the "nice serves!", her heart. She watched as the ball flew from the setter's hand and slammed across the net. Directly at her.
She stepped back to get a good angle, bracing herself for impact. The perfect spot, the perfect time, yet the ball refused to land perfectly in her arms. The ball curved ever so slightly, hitting only her right arm, and spiraled away from the court. Confused, she turned around to see the ball touch the ground. Oh no.
Once again, the cheers disrupted her focus and the whistle blew, ringing into her ears of her mistake. She was really freaking out now; her hands were shaking, her vision blurred, and her breathing hitched. It had been a while since she had felt this jittery, it was scary and exhilarating. The rest of Niiyama must have taken noticed and rushed to her side. "Are you alright, Kanoka?" the captain asked, followed by the others who displayed similar concern. "Yes, I'm fine." Amanai turned to the net, focusing on Dainohara's setter. The whistle blew once more, and everyone got into their positions.
The setter aimed for her, to which Amanai expected so. She wouldn't—she couldn't—allow herself to make the same mistake again. Her eyes followed the ball as it came towards her and shifted her arms when she noticed the ball curve like last time. But once again, she lost control of it, and it flung her arm away, forcing its way towards the back of the court. And with that, the match was over. It ended as fast as it started.
It was a heartbreaking defeat for Niiyama Joshi. After leaving the gymnasium, they all made their way to the changing room, heads hanging. A couple of them were crying, comforting each other with hugs and pats on the back. Amanai didn't cry. As much as it pained in her heart, she couldn't get the tears behind her eyes to come out. It was frustrating. So frustrating. Her nerves got the best of her, and what could have been multiple chances to come back, ended up in failure. She knew that her serve receives were bad, and Dainohara must have known. It must have been why they targeted her; they knew her weaknesses and took advantage of them.
Amanai was the first one to leave the changing room while the rest of Niiyama were still inside. She stood outside, leaning against the wall near the entrance of the tournament stadium. She hoped that the January chill would numb her enough to forget the tingling in her arms from the match. She stared at her shoes, shifting her weight from one to the other. She was always told never to look at the ground; stand proud and confident because she was tall and had a good figure. But her height seemed to have failed her despite that. She felt closer to the ground than she did the sky.
“Kanoka Amanai.”
The sound of her name being called—not by one of her teammates, but a guy?—startled her, snapping her back to reality. She noticed shoes in front of her own and looked up to match a face with the voice. Her eyes widened. "Itachiyama's Ace?" When did she get the attention of one of the top 3 aces in the country?
"Kiyoomi Sakusa." He corrected. Another guy peered over Sakusa's shoulder, but didn't bother to introduce himself. Sakusa didn't seem to pay any mind to him either. He continued. "I saw the last part of your match today." Amanai’s breathing hitched. So he saw that. Her face faltered at the mere mention of it but she plastered on a smile with furrowed brows that meant otherwise.
"It... was a close one." Was all she could muster. For some reason, her eyes decided now would be a great time to let the waterworks out, but she forced herself against it. She couldn’t, not in front of someone.
"Even if it was your loss, you should know what you need to work on." He paused. "You have potential, Amanai."
Amanai blinked. It was an honor that the Kiyoomi Sakusa decided to talk to her of all people. She heard that he wasn't the type of person to talk to people he didn't know openly, yet here he was. Comforting her. Before she could say anything to respond, he was already walking away. Only the guy who was behind him was left in his place. He had an aura that completely contrasted Sakusa’s.
"Hi! Name's Motoya Komori, Kiyoomi's cousin." They were... cousins? "Sorry, he just came out of nowhere and startled you. I was surprised to see him walk up to you as well. He's not... the extraverted type. I remember we were watching the rest of the matches today after we lost our quarter-final match.”
“You guys lost? But—“
“Yeah...” Komori scratched the back of his neck. “It was a real let down. Our captain got hurt too. But it’s alright, we’ll make it through next time.” He clenched his hand in a fist and grinned. Amanai laughed for the first time. “Anyways, Kiyoomi must have noticed you while we were watching. I thought he wasn’t even paying attention—"
His train of thought was interrupted by Sakusa calling out for him to hurry up, to which he replied with a "Coming!" He faced Amanai again. "Well, Kiyoomi calls! Take it the best way you can, he means good. I'll be leaving now, but I hope we see each other again someday, Kanoka-chan."
And with that, he sprinted off with a wave, leaving Amanai alone to her thoughts once again. She recalled what Sakusa said to her. You have potential. People have always said she had potential in volleyball, but coming from him in a time where she doubted herself made her chest warm.
"Kiyoomi Sakusa-san?" Amanai called out as she approached his side, barely audible above all the chatter from the rest of the class. She had her hand up in a little wave. "Hi, I don't know if you remember me-"
"Kanoka Amanai. Niiyama's Ace." He replied monotonously, looking back at his phone.
"Ah, yes!" When she was in her third year, she rose to her status as an ace. Wait, we didn't talk in our third year, how did he know? "Um, is it alright if I sit here? All the seats in the front row were taken, and I don't know anyone familiar here..." She awkwardly smiled. From the parts of Sakusa's face that weren't covered by his mask, she saw his brows furrow as he glanced at her.
"A seat across." He compromised. Before she could reply, he put his bag in the seat directly beside him, preventing her from sitting in it. She decided it would have to do, and stepped back to the next seat over, where she removed her own bag and placed it in her lap. Amanai took out her fresh notebook and pen and set it on the table. She stole a glimpse at Sakusa, who didn't pay her any attention, and simply continued scrolling through his phone like their conversation never happened. It was odd. With her hand to her chin, she tapped her pen on the table waiting for the professor to come in.
Not too long later, she got what she asked for. The professor walked in with a greeting, setting her materials on the table in the front of the room. While in the middle of her introduction, the door opened and a student walked in.
"S-Sorry, I'm late!" he said, bowing and catching his breath.
The professor waved their hand in reassurance. "You're excused, it's the first day of class. However, if you're late again... there will be punishments."
"Yes!" The student scanned the room looking for a seat while the professor continued. He spotted a seat next to Amanai and made his way up the stairs, plopping right next to her. She watched him nod as a greeting and she nodded in response. She quickly noticed the instance he sat down that—
He smelled. Bad.
Amanai suspected he must have run here, and that the smell was due to all the sweat. She could tell, judging by how he was heaving in his seat like he was still catching his breath and it looked like he had just run a mile. Amanai could barely concentrate on what she was writing; she wanted to pass out. For a moment, she contemplated just leaving, but she reasoned that it would be rude to both him and to the class. She stretched her sleeve over her hand and covered her nose and mouth to make do. It didn’t make much of a difference, but at least she could smell her faded laundry detergent.
Sakusa must have noticed too, considering how his eyes narrowed in disgust. He turned his head to the source of the smell and quickly noticed Amanai’s agony. Sakusa tapped her shoulder with his pen, causing her to turn around, and lifted his bag from the seat it was occupying. Amanai was slightly confused at the gesture, and raised an eyebrow at him. He simply tilted his head, signaling her permission to sit beside him instead of where she currently was. Taking up his offer in an instant, she pushed her notebook and carried her bag to the next seat over, gently sitting down in relief. She removed her sleeve from her face and breathed. The smell of sweat still lingered, but it was a mass improvement from being directly beside the guy.
She noticed Sakusa rummaging through his bag beside her, and turned to watch what he was doing. He took out a smaller bag inside and opened it. It was filled with sanitary items: wipes, tissues, disinfectant spray, hand sanitizer. He just carries this around with him all the time? He pulled an unopened, packaged mask from the bag and handed it to her. Her eyes bounced between the mask and Sakusa.
Amanai pointed at herself, whispering, "Is this for me?"
He deadpanned. "Do you want it or no?"
She accepted it, opening it up, putting the wrapper in her pocket, and immediately put it on. She sighed. She could finally focus on what the professor was talking about and what she was writing without her nose being stifled. She was surprised that Sakusa was willing to help her. Just before, he was keeping his distance from her, telling her to sit a seat away from him. Now he gave up his... bag's... seat and gave her a face mask.
The rest of class went relatively smoothly from there. When the professor dismissed class, everyone packed up their things and shuffled towards the exit. Some people went out in a group, others went alone. She noticed that there were even some clusters that lingered in their seats to talk to each other before they had to travel to their next class. Amanai noticed that the guy that was beside her had already left, and she started packing up to leave while there were still people walking out. She rose from her seat and looked back at Sakusa, who had already packed up, but had no intention of leaving.
"You... aren't coming?" Amanai inquired and tilted her head.
"I'm waiting for everyone else to leave." He responded.
"Oh." She stood, fiddling with the hem of her sleeve before sitting back down in her seat next to Sakusa. She made sure to adjust her mask, which she still had on, just in case.
"...What are you doing?"
"Keeping you company. I have some time to kill before my next class." Seeing as he made no refute to her presence, she continued. "Oh, thanks for the seat and mask. You saved me there."
"I could smell it from here. I figured it was worse beside him."
She laughed. "It really was. I thought I was going to pass out."
"Hopefully he doesn't sit there again. However, considering how he was late this time, it wouldn't surprise me that he would be late the next time."
"Oh no... not again..." She agonized the thought of having to deal with the smell every other day. "If he does, do you mind if I... sit here again?"
Sakusa hesitated to analyze her. Of course, there were definitely other places she could sit in other than the one right beside him. But Amanai was a relatively clean person; she never put her bag on the ground, she kept the mask wrapper in her pocket, and she still wore the mask when speaking to him, even though the guy left. He didn't mind her being a seat closer. He turned away from her gaze, standing up to put on his bag after realizing that most of the room was empty. "...Only if."
Amanai smiled underneath her mask and made her way across the aisle of chairs and down the stairs, Sakusa following not too far behind. Before going past the door, she waited for Sakusa to catch up, and they walked down the hall side by side before separating to go to their next classes.