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Niall lay back and let Liam do it. Cause, you know, Liam was Liam, and he probably had a good enough reason. Though maybe Niall was just trying to kid himself because before now, he always thought that there was never EVER an excuse for something like this.
Liam had crashed into Niall's apartment around 1 am, just as Niall was getting ready for bed. They had a few weeks off so the blonde had been staying up, watching movies and eating as much as he wanted because why not?
Niall hadn't asked where Liam went that night because there was no reason to; Liam was responsible and he was probably with Danielle or something.
"Hi Liam!" He said happily (and tiredly) as Liam stomped into his room.
But Niall's smile dropped when he saw the unusual expression Liam held, as if he was angry or repressed. And the look in his eyes kind of scared the younger lad because it was a look he'd never seen before and his eyes were less puppy brown and more, just black.
"Liam..." Niall said carefully, "...are you alright...?"
That's when Liam growled and lunged forward, grabbing Niall's shirt collar and almost lifting him off the floor.
Niall was squeaking in fear and surprise, and at first he tried to fight Liam off but when he was pinned roughly to the floor, he knew there was no point. Because Liam, of course, was stronger than him.
Niall was shaking and whimpering a lot when Liam started groaning obscene things into his ear. It didn't sound alluring. It just sounded threatening and scary, but Niall didn't shout for help. It was late and their first night off in ages. The boys were in the next room (they had to share a hotel room at the last minute), and he didn't want to wake them up, so he kept quiet.
Niall stayed still, only occasionally squirming (and all-the-time shaking) because Liam had said he was going to hurt him more if he moved. He started to hiccup and cry as Liam began roughly ripping his clothes off.
So, that's how Niall got to be were he was, naked and underneath the brown haired boy's bigger body. Biting his lip hard, hard enough for blood to be dribbling down his chin. He scrunched his eyes shut and his hands flew to his mouth, as all he could feel was painpainpainpainpainpain like he was being ripped in half.
He couldn't even feel Liam inside of him anymore, just numb white pain that shot from all different places and rippled through his body. Liam's eyes were still black and scary. Everything felt scary now.
He let out one last wet sob before hearing a piercing white noise through his mind and his body became limp. He dropped his arms from his mouth, his hands covered in blood. His eyes relaxed open and he stared up into the ceiling, his mouth ajar and still dripping red.
Niall lay there, being violated by his friend, tears silently tracking down his face. His eyes were glazed over and all he could feel was white. Whiteness that he just wished would suck him up. He couldn't breathe now, the air was too thick. Liam was too heavy.
His mind flashed briefly to the day before, when Liam had hugged him and laughed with him and smiled that smile and his eyes were puppy brown and wonderful.
Niall's whiteness became blackness and he felt himself slipping away. His security and all.
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Liam woke up and didn't remember most of the night before. He remembered Danielle breaking up with him, and him going out for a drink afterwards. Liam knew for sure he didn't even get that drunk, just buzzed, not even enough to make him not feel angry or sad. He had seen the break up coming for a while, but he still felt kind of bummed when it happened.
But the alcohol just took it to a new level.
It sort of worried him, the fact that he couldn't remember what happened after the bar.
Well, he woke up in his own bed so he guessed it couldn't have been that bad.
He got up and took a shower, before getting dressed and heading to the kitchen.
When Niall woke up he was splayed across his bedroom floor, naked and covered in purple bruises and dried blood. He eventually found the strength to stand and fetch a cloth to clean up the mess that was on the floor. He grabbed his white bed sheets and wrapped it around his shoulders, letting it drag across the floor. He didn't shower, not matter how dirty and disgusting he felt, because he didn't want to wake any of the boys up.
He went out into the kitchen to get himself some water, before he heard a voice.
"Morning, Niall."
He froze, remembering that voice and how different it sounded last night. His memories flashed and he began to quiver.
He turned to Liam, his eyes slightly glistening, and fear evident in his face.
Liam looked confused.
"What's wro-" His eyes flickered down to the white sheets draped around the blonde irishman, some slipping from his right shoulder and revealing dark purple bruises scattered against his pale skin.
Pictures of the same pale skin flashed through Liam's head, pictures of tears and blood, whimpering and pleas.
"P-Please....please stop...it hurts..."
Tears fell from Liam's wide brown eyes as he remembered. He fucking remembered what he did.
"Fuck..." He whispered, his face contorting in sorrow, shaking his head, "...fuck...no...no..."
Liam grabbed his hair and tugged hard, "Shit shit shit shit shit shit fucking shit!"
Niall left the room, quickly scuttling to the living room.
"Wait!" Liam yelled after him, spinning him around and wrapping his arms around his small body, "I'm so sorry Niall. I'm so fucking sorry, I don't know...I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me. God fucking dammit!"
Niall shook violently. Liam never cursed.
"Please don't hurt me," He whispered, backing out of Liam's tight embrace.
Liam backed up too, slumping on to the couch and putting his head in his hands sobbing loudly.
"I'll make it up to you, Niall. I fucking promise! I'm so sorry!"
"What's all the fuss?" Harry slurred, dragging his tired feet into the room. The look of the two woke him up, "Liam? Niall? What's going on?"
"Harry...I..." Liam cried, just ending up in even more hysterics. Harry's eyes flicked back to Niall.
"Niall, what are you doing in sheets?" He asked, walking up to him, arm out stretched. He froze when the blonde visibly flinched.
"I..." Niall whispered, his voice absolutely broken and full of fear, "I didn't want to...to get my clothes dirty."
Harry jumped when Liam let out a loud and frustrated groan.
"What's happening?" Louis called, walking into the room with Zayn behind him, the Bradfod boy wearing only boxers.
"I don't know," Harry said. Zayn huffed and left the room, looking completely exhausted still.
"Liam?" Louis said walking forward.
"Don't!" Liam yelled, startling them, especially Niall, "Don't....fucking come near me. I'm...disgusting."
"Liam...you're not disgusting," Louis' eyebrows furrowed.
"Wait, what did you mean 'didn't want to get my clothes dirty'?" Harry asked the shivering blonde.
"I...I didn't take a shower...I didn't want to wake anyone up," He squeaked, eyes looking frantically between his three other band mates.
"Okay, what the fuck is going on?" Louis demanded.
Liam and Louis began to argue which frightened Niall almost as much as last night did, because Niall was really broken and anything bad would just make him cry. Harry started to question Niall in attempt to comfort him, which only made him more confused.
"Do you wanna know what happened?! Do you wanna know what I FUCKING did?!" Liam screamed through the hotel room.
"Liam, did you do something to Niall," Harry asked. The question made Niall jump and he began to cry.
"Liam..." Louis said in a threatening tone, but Liam said nothing, his eyes lost, "Liam! For fuck sakes!"
"Last night I..." Liam started, tears still trickling down from his red eyes, "Danielle broke up with me, and you know, I was bummed, and a little pissed off...so I went to a bar. I only got buzzed, I swear. And the alcohol didn't even numb me, it just made it worse..."
"Where is this going?" Louis huffed.
"When I came back...I don't know what I was doing, but I was just so angry and upset for no reason and I had to find something to vent on. So I..." Liam gulped, "I...went to Niall's room and I...fuck!"
"Spit it out!"
"I FUCKED HIM LOUIS!"
Harry's mouth was ajar.
"What-"
"I pinned him down and I...I ripped of all his clothes and....
...I raped him."
Niall's tears ceased and he looked to the floor, not able to even look at his friends, because he knew the looks on their faces would be of disgust towards Niall. Niall had been so open and available, and so weak. He was disgusting now. He was used and dirty.
Niall sunk to the floor, his sheets wrapping around his small body easily. He heard hurried and far away footsteps quickly getting closer. He assumed it was Zayn, running back into the room.
He heard different and much closer footsteps and saw someone crouch down in front of him. His chin was lifted and his eyes met Harry's surprisingly calm green one's.
"Hey," He cooed softly to the blonde.
But Niall started crying again because Harry's hands were so big and Harry was so big and this big boy was touching him and he was so scared. Panic flashed through Harry's bright eyes.
"Hey, d-don't cry," Zayn stepped forward, but Niall just squealed in fear and cried harder, because Zayn was big too and Zayn could easily pin him to the floor and do bad things to him. Zayn froze, desperately trying to think of something to do.
Harry quickly moved out of the way as Louis stepped forward, bending down to Niall's level. Niall calmed a bit because, even though Louis was taller than him, he was not that much taller and Louis' jokes always made Niall laugh.
Louis raised a hand slowly to Niall's bruised and wet cheek, cupping it and stroking it with his thumb. Niall abruptly stopped crying, as he found himself entranced by Louis' piercing grey eyes.
"Zayn," Louis said clearly, without breaking eye contact with the irish boy, "Take Liam out please."
Niall didn't even noticed the boy's name being said, his mind hypnotized on Louis just for that moment. Liam shuffled out of the room, Zayn's arm around his shaking shoulders.
Because even though what Liam did was unforgivable, he was their brother and he deserved a fair chance too. He was almost as broken about this as Niall was, and he clearly wasn't in his right mind when he did it. Niall and Liam both needed comfort and understanding, even if one of them was definitely more in the wrong.
"Don't worry Nialler," Louis said softly, breaking Niall out of his small trance, "No one's going to hurt you."
"Louis..." Niall's broken voice mumbled.
"No one's going to hurt you, Nialler," Louis smiled warmly, "Everything's going to be alright. Don't worry, everything's going to be alright."
"Louis," Niall whimpered louder, his eyes becoming glassy. Louis pulled him close into his arms, rubbing his trembling back and shushing him gently.
"That's it Niall, ssshhh, we all love you, it's alright," Louis quietly cooed.
"Don't let them hurt me," Niall squeaked into the brown haired boy's shoulder, "Louis, don't let them hurt me, please."
"Sssshhh, baby, no one's going to hurt you," Louis stroked Niall's brown roots, "We don't want to hurt you, we love you Niall, no one will ever hurt you ever again."
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Niall quickly warmed back up to Harry, only feeling slightly intimidated by the taller boy. They crouched in front of blonde as his tears and bunny like quivers mostly ceased. Louis stroked his arm.
"We have to check the damage...okay?" Harry said slowly. Niall flinched and shook his head, "Don't worry Niall, we're not going to hurt you."
"I'm disgusting," Niall whispered.
"You're beautiful Niall," Louis whispered, stroking his trembling cheek, "We're not going to hurt you, we're not going to do bad things. You're not ugly, you're so wonderful okay? We need to see, Niall, so we can help."
Niall didn't answer, but didn't protest when Louis removed the warm blanket from his cold shoulders. He spread the white sheet across the floor, noting it's dirty patches of dried blood.
"We need you to lie down Niall. Don't worry, nothing's going to happen," Louis said quietly, laying the irish boy on top of the blanket. Niall's shaky hands went to cover himself, mumbling 'disgusting', but Harry softly stopped them, laying them next to the blonde's small body.
"No," He said so Niall obeyed.
Harry gulped whilst he inspected the purple spots scattered across the slim body, unsure of which were hickeys and which were bruises. His hand trailed passed a few and Niall whimpered.
"It's okay," Louis said softly, stroking Niall's hair. He pressed a faint kiss to Niall's forehead, so soft it was like it didn't happen. Niall calmed and stared at Louis in wonder, before leaning up and pressing his lips to Louis' chin. The brunette smiled warmly down at him, his hand still petting.
Harry continued searching Niall's body with his eyes and his hands, being as careful as possible.
"You're going to have to open your legs so I can see okay? We're not disgusted, don't worry," He said placing his hands on Niall's hips, gently stroking the purple and violent, hand shaped bruises.
Niall's eyes widened, but alas, he nodded and placed his feet flat on the ground, his knees bent. Harry moved his hands as carefully as he could, and spread Niall's legs open wider.
Niall gulped and began to quiver more violently, closing his eyes tightly. Louis shushed and kissed him more.
"Why didn't you call out for us, sweetheart?" Louis questioned, attempting to distract Niall from Harry's wondering hands.
"I..." Niall gulped, "I didn't want to w-wake any of you up...we...hadn't rested for a while...s-so...I didn't want to bother..." He trailed off. Louis dove down in a fit of despair and pressed his lips to Niall's in a few chaste kisses. Harry noticed the exchange, but thought nothing of it. He knew that it was simply for comfort and that Louis was always faithful, but that didn't prevent the tiny spark of jealousy to flight through his eyes. He willed it away, scolding himself for his ridiculousness.
Louis kissed Niall because he knew that whenever the young lad was upset he needed to be babied. In this situation, the blonde was the epitome of upset, so kisses, coddling and cooing came naturally, with no awkward side effects. Louis could truly feel his heart shattering at the look of the boy beneath him.
His thin body was covered in purple and red marks, some harsh hickeys and others bruises. He had blood stains around his neck, and dried blood was caked all around his lower regions. His hair was disheveled and knotted violently.
His eyes were the worst. Louis could see the vulnerability in his wide sky blue irises, like the Niall Horan he knew had been pulled, scraped and ripped out of him, to be replaced with the broken mess he now was. Louis shook those thoughts out of his head, because Niall was Niall and still the same person as he was before. Just not really there anymore.
He watched as Niall pouted his lips slightly, willing Louis to place his upon them. Louis dipped down and kissed the sore boy one last time, his brow tensing as he pushed all of the love and comfort he could into Niall's lips, as if saying 'everything is going to be alright' and 'I love you no matter what'.
Louis began humming to Niall as Harry's eyes began to tear up.
Suddenly, Niall squealed and flew back. Harry's hands had come much too close to the main place of worry and Niall could see last night flashing through his mind.
He curled into a fetal position and tried to calm his breaths. He felt four warm arms wrapping around him, but he did not shy away. He did not flinch, or whimper.
He cried because they felt so good around him and he wished that last night with Liam could have felt the same.
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"What are we gonna do Zayn?" Liam whispered, meeting the raven haired boy's eyes, his irises teary and looking hopefully at the other, as if he could magically fix the stupendous mistake he had made. Because Zayn could do anything right? Zayn was perfect. Magical even.
Yeah, Liam thought, Zayn'll help.
Zayn exhaled a shaky sigh, running his hands through his hair. A move he never did; yeah, Zayn loved his hair.
"I don't know Liam," Zayn whispered back, "I just don't...I don't know."
Liam turned away, his back to the other and his face in his hands; he let out a loud sob.
Zayn flinched, the natural urge to wrap his arms around Liam and comfort him pushed forward automatically. But he didn't move. Another part of his mind was telling him not to touch him.
Zayn couldn't touch him after he had done something so horrible.