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Aaron stares at both of them with his classic blank stare, chin resting on his laced hands.
No chess? Aaron asks, sounding slightly disappointed without looking the part.
You always win, the Wizard replies matter-of-factly.
It's my favorite game though.
The Pirate kicks their feet up onto Aaron's desk and leans back in their rocker. "Ain't my fault ye both er sore losers."
Aaron's gaze darts to their dirt-riddled boots for a mere moment. Any suggestions, then?
The Pirate grins. "You know what I want ta do."
The Wizard's equally-thousand-yard-stare darkens ever so slightly. No.
But Aaron doesn't shoot the Pirate down this time.
I suppose we can give it a try. It's summer update time after all. We have plenty of time.
The Wizard actually stands this time. NO.
"What's wrong, Wizzy?" the Pirate coos. "Scared yer gonna get humiliated by your young'r?"
The Wizard releases a rumble that shakes the subspace. Neither of the other beings beside them react much to it.
The Pirate finally swings their feet down and makes a rough jab towards their magical counterpart. "Hey, I gave yer weird fight sphere thing-"
Duel circle, the Wizard corrects.
"-a go- DON' INTERRUP' ME! I think it's time fer ye to give my stuff a shot. It's only fair."
Absolutely not.
"Aaron! Ye hear them, right?" the Pirate exclaims.
Now, Wizard, there's no need to be a spoil sport. Despite his stiff expression, Aaron's eyes sparkle with something dangerous. You don't need a reset, do you?
If the Wizard could sweat, a single bead of it would roll down their cheek. No... The system conversion might not be as compatible.
It's not as bad as you're thinking, Aaron reassures them. He claps his hands together before quickly pulling them apart, expanding a transparent blue screen in the space between them. Once it is fully expanded, a series of strings of white text begin to rush across the box incomprehensibly fast.
> run PirateMagic.exe
> add tempuser("Wizard")
> apply user("Wizard") at instance.Storage
The Wizard can't help but take a hesitant step back as a red square lights up beneath their feet.
It shouldn't hurt too much, Aaron seems to be trying to reassure them, all the while basking in the oncoming chaos.
What-?
A hot spike of pain flashes through the Wizard suddenly, their magical essence being twisted, constricted, and condensed. They almost lose their balance as their vision doubles briefly. To their relief, the sensation feels to last a lot longer that it actually does, and before they know it, they have no idea why they're so out-of-breath. What they do know is that their strength is not nearly as potent. They feel so... vulnerable and squishy. Their health has been lowered significantly, tapping out at around 2,000, and their mana is completely gone despite them still feeling their magic swirling somewhere within them.
There's a shift and a growing maniacal cackle off to their side as the Pirate rises from their chair.
"A'ight now, Wizzy," they grin, cracking their knuckles, "it's time to get yer butt beat!"
The Wizard's breath hitches as they shoot the Pirate a glare. Then they teleport away from their side, reappearing a few feet away from Aaron's desk. The Pirate is fully on their feet down, staring the Wizard down with a wicked smile. Above their head, little white words phase in and out of existence: 'Coward's Bane'
Hu- Ack!
The Pirate flings a bolt of energy straight at the Wizard's face. They stagger, blinded and confused as to how they could have done that. Once they're able to see again, the Pirate is already lining up a shot with their Sparkpistol.
They shoot once and it lands, striking the Wizard's left shoulder: 'Parting Shot'
Then they fire again. 'Burst Fire', 'Burst Fire', 'Double Tap'. The Wizard barely has enough time to read between strikes as the Pirate slowly peppers them at a distance.
"Can't get away from me so easy, Wizzy!" the Pirate mocks.
That wasn't- the Wizard begins to bite back, though they fall short as their magic fails to respond to their intent. For whatever reason they can no longer teleport anywhere, which just means they'll have to walk, and walking is slow. No matter. They have other spells at their disposal.
They gesture back at the Pirate, only to be met with another phrase: 'Quick Draw'
"Ah-hah!" the Pirate cries, whipping out their Sparkpistol once again with a spinning flourish. The Wizard's pointed palm gets scorches by the energy bolt as they send forth a Heckhound. They mutter a (kind-friendly) curse beneath their breath and attempt to viciously shake the pain from their throbbing fingers.
'Elusive'
They just barely make out the white words that appear above the Pirate as they are consumed by a roar of hot fire. And when it disappears... the Pirate is striking a lunge-like pose and appears to be just as undercooked as they were seconds before.
'Return Fire'
The Wizard is nailed once again by the Pirate's Sparkpistol.
'Double Tap', 'Burst Fire'. The Pirate is cackling as they pull the trigger again and again. Don't they ever have to reload that thing?!
Aaron! the Wizard cries desperately from beneath the hailstorm.
Sorry, Wizard. This is just how the system is.
Can't you help me?!
Well, I couldn't take you through the tutorial since that'd break a lot of things-
"Who needs a tutorial for fun?" the Pirate cries.
'Mojo Echo'
Hrk! The Wizard doubles over, the wind knocked clean out of their chest. Just as there is no winning in a duel circle against the Wizard, there is no chance at all facing the Pirate on their own turf.
Aaron tilts his head to one side, gaze landing on the Pirate. That's enough.
Finally, the Pirate lowers their arms for just a moment. "What was that?"
That's enough, Pirate. You're going to crack them.
"Oh, soh Wizzy can fry me, crush me, freeze me, zap me, and yer drawing the line at me shootin' em?"
> value.setHealth=2000, user("Wizard") in instance.Storage
The Wizard lets out a sigh of relief as the pain eases from their shell.
Bear in mind that the Wizard is not as easily replaceable as you are, Aaron warns. Have fun but don't ruin them.
An uneasy silence descends upon the two characters at the reminder of their supposed 'mortality'. Aaron keeps on smiling as though he said nothing troubling at all.
"Don't ruin em? WHAT?! Wizzy can take a beatin'!" the Pirate explodes. Is it that the Pirate didn't get the first part of Aaron's statement, or do they not even care?
The Pirate is just as irreplaceable, the Wizard speaks up.
Aaron lets out a laugh. I'm just warning them to be careful!
The Wizard doesn't share in his relaxed yet attentive attitude. Even with all of the frying, crushing, freezing, and zapping the Wizard had done in the past, Aaron had also stepped in to ensure that the Wizard wasn't overstepping. He said the same thing then, too: Have fun but don't ruin them.
Then again... the Pirate has always functioned very differently from the Wizard.
"How am I s'posed to go easy when I got all this amazin' luck?" the Pirate continues to complain. "They can't shoot me or I'll shoot em back. They can't punch me cuz same thing. And I'm slip'ry." They pull a pair of shades from out of their pocket and don them before folding their arms and smirking. "I can't be beat, bro."
That can be changed, Aaron replies.
That makes the Pirate waver. "Ah, nah, thas a decent idea an' all but... how would I pound em if I can't pound em?"
How did they pound you last time?
By 'pounding' them, the Wizard answers.
'Return Fire'. "Shatap." The bolt stings the Wizard's lower leg, making them jump.