Archive of Our Own

The European leg of the tour was over, and Luke had found comfort in the busy days Ashton kept him occupied with at home during the break. Grocery runs, yoga, swimming, yard work, home renovations, cleaning more tour prep… and the cycle would start again every couple of days. 

But most of it was in preparation for Ashton’s family and friends to come visit.

Luke, Calum, and Michael’s families came to LA at least once every two years for a visit. Ashton’s immediate family hadn’t visited since the Sounds Good Feels Good era, relying on either tour dates or Christmas for Ashton to come home and see them. Now, Ashton’s mum, sister, brother, and two family friends were coming to stay for a week at Luke and Ashton’s new house. 

Luke wasn’t nervous. He had met Ashton’s family a million times, as a friend and as a romantic partner, but he had never met these family friends. All he knew was that it was a friend of Ashton’s mum and her daughter, who was Ashton’s age. Luke wasn’t sure how he felt about that.

Nobody ever said it out loud, but anyone close to Luke knew he was an inherently jealous person, probably stemming from being the youngest of three boys and the youngest in the band (getting nearly everything he’s ever wanted). It was never nasty; it was purely out of instinct and insecurity. 

Since being with Ashton, there hadn’t been many major threats to their relationship. Luke only really felt jealous when he’d log into Twitter or Instagram and see thousands of people thirsting over his boyfriend. But those were people they didn’t know, and the band’s days of sleeping with fans were pretty much over (Calum was the unknown factor in this assumption).

So for Luke, hosting Ashton’s family and some strangers that Ashton grew up with was pretty nervewracking, and Luke couldn’t help but feel the anxiety-induced tingles when he saw the similar-aged family friend for the first time.

She had dirty blond hair, dark brown eyes, tan skin, and freckles all over. She looked like all of Ashton’s exes combined into one person, and Luke could feel the steam shoot out of his ears. So of course, she had to be the nicest, most charming and intelligent person to exist. That was her reputation, at least, from Ashton’s insights.

Luke had been home preparing food for everyone while Ashton had gone to pick up the group from the airport. Grilled chicken orzo salad with avocado and some other greens. Luke kept his mind focused on that until he heard the sound of the door to the garage opening and Ashton’s laughter booming through the hallway. Suitcase wheels rolled closer and closer, and Luke then registered Ashton’s brother’s voice.

“It smells delicious in here, wow!” 

“Doesn’t it? I have Luke making us lunch,” Ashton told them. Luke took a deep breath before following their voices and greeting them in the hall.

“Hi, guys!” He smiled, mostly at Ashton’s mum, as he took in the sight of the two strangers who would be living with them for the week. Ashton’s sister was the first person to envelop Luke in a hug; She was who Luke was closest to in Ashton’s family. He hugged her back tightly. 

“Oh, Luke! Hi! You look lovely,” Ashton’s mum said as she waited for her hug. Luke then brought her in.

“So do you! Good flight?”

“Long flight,” she chuckled the same way Ashton did.

“Of course.”

“But yes, smooth flight. I was able to sleep for the latter half.”

“Oh, great! Hope you’re hungry,” Luke said as he pulled away and brought in Ashton’s brother for a quick hug.

“Starved,” his mum said, “And excited for whatever you’ve made.”

“I hope you like it. Chicken and orzo and avocado and kale and—”

“—oh, whatever it is, I’ll eat it,” she ran her hand through Luke’s hair as he pulled away from Ashton’s brother, as if to assure herself that she was actually there and that Luke existed. 

“Lu, Honey, this is Trish and her daughter, Zara,” Ashton directed Luke’s attention to the two women he had yet to greet. Zara and Trish were the same exact person, the only difference being some signs of aging, but even that was partially masked by what Luke assumed was some Botox and lip fillers. They both smiled at Luke like he was a little kid, taking in the sight of him as if he was small and needed to be coddled.

“So nice to meet you guys,” Luke said as he took Trish into his arms, and then Zara.

“Oh, I can’t believe it took this long to meet you, Luke! We’ve been keeping up with your business since you all were just teenagers. You look so handsome!” Trish pinched Luke’s cheeks. Luke couldn’t help but laugh through the slight pain of being pinched and the embarrassment of them seeing him as a prepubescent teen.

“And now you have our Ash hooked on you. So nice to see you in person, Luke!” Zara smiled. 

“Thanks, guys. Nice to see you. I hope you guys are good with the sleeping arrangements!” Luke was nervous hosting people in their new house, but their arrangement had seemed the best for the situation, Ashton’s mum and sister taking Luke and Ashton’s bedroom, Trish and Zara taking the queen-sized guest bedroom, Ashton’s brother taking the nice day bed in their studio room, and Luke and Ashton using the pull-out bed from their sofa in the living room.

“Oh, Luke. You guys are so generous with your space. We will be just so fine!” Trish reassured him.

“And if anyone absolutely hates it, you can take it up with HR,” Ashton joked and everyone laughed. Luke liked that everyone laughed. Luke always laughed at Ashton’s jokes, but not everyone always did. To Luke, Ashton was the funniest person on Earth, and he was absolutely flabbergasted when everyone else didn’t always think the same. 

“I’ll be speaking to Luke if your manners aren’t 100% in check,” his mum joked back, and Luke blushed. It already seemed like the dynamic would be very comfortable over the next week, and Luke appreciated that.

“Yes Ma’am,” Ashton smiled and winked at Luke. “Now let me take all of your bags to your rooms. Lu will get you guys some food,” Ashton told the group.

“And I want a house tour as soon as we are done eating,” his sister demanded.

“Of course!” Ashton said, grabbing three of the suitcases and wandering down the hallway to their respective rooms.

“Yeah, you guys can follow me,” Luke told them before turning and heading towards the kitchen. The group made nice comments about the kitchen as Luke prepared all of their bowls. “Okay, everyone should have a bowl. There are some dressings right there you can choose from. Would anyone like some water or something else to drink? We have coke, sprite, tea, apple juice, milk. I could make a smoothie—”

“Waters sound perfect, Luke, thank you,” Trish ordered for the group. Luke nodded and got everyone situated at their dining room table. Zara and Ashton’s siblings made note of the view of the pool in the backyard, glad they brought their swimsuits, it seemed. 

“And we will take you guys to the beach whenever you want,” Luke added as he served the last person, Ashton’s brother, his water.

“Woohoo! LA beaches… can’t wait to brag to my friends about this,” Zara laughed. 

“Aussie beaches are pretty spectacular too, no?” Luke asked. Maybe he was just homesick.

“They’re good, but it’s the novelty of it all,” Zara told him, her voice leaning into a bit of a condescending tone. Luke grinned and nodded as he moved the dressing bottles to the center of the dining table. Everyone was very kind, but Luke wanted Ashton to join as soon as possible so that he didn’t feel so stranded. He could talk to Ashton’s sister for hours, but with everyone else in the equation, he felt a bit lost and overwhelmed.

The group started to talk amongst themselves as Luke went back into the kitchen. He started to prepare tea for Ashton and some milk for himself. He then felt a hand wrap around his waist and a kiss placed on his shoulder. 

“Hi,” Luke felt a bit too stressed to lean into Ashton’s touch, but that didn’t stop his boyfriend from moving his hand in circles over his stomach. Luke could already feel the butterflies settle.

“Hi, Baby. Thank you for lunch. It looks incredible,” Ashton kissed his shoulder again.

“Thanks! Our bowls are just on the counter there if you wouldn’t mind bringing them to the table? And I’m just finishing up our drinks here so I’ll be there shortly,” Luke told him. Ashton detached himself from Luke. There was only one bowl left on the counter.

“Lu, there’s only one bowl left.”

“What?” he turned, “Oh…”

“Did someone take two, or—”

“I must have miscalculated how many of us there were,” Luke’s shoulders dropped in disappointment.

“You can have mine, Honey.”

“No! I—” he stopped himself from shouting, “Go eat with your family, please. I’ll fix something up for myself,” Luke said. Ashton tilted his head.

“Do you want to share?”

“No, there won’t be enough. You’ll be hungry in an hour if we do.”

“I can make myself something—”

“No, Ash. Please go enjoy eating with your family. I’ll have your tea out in a minute,” Ashton could sense Luke was feeling uneasy and mad at himself, so he decided not to push further. He didn’t want Luke to regress into his shell. So Ashton nodded, still looking concerned, and grabbed his food.

“Thank you. I love you,” Ashton smiled as he stepped out.

“Love you,” Luke said back, frustrated with nobody but himself. He heard everyone celebrate as Ashton joined them, and that made him feel slightly better. He quickly whipped up a ham and cheese sandwich for himself and took everything out to the table. 

“Oh, Luke! We’re so sorry there wasn’t enough for you! I would’ve let you have mine if I knew,” Ashton’s mum said as he sat down next to Ashton.

“Oh, it’s no problem,” Luke didn’t look up from his sandwich at first, a little more nervous now that there was not an easy way to escape any conversation. Ashton had one hand on his fork and moved the other to Luke’s thigh.

“Wanna swap?” Ashton’s brother nudged Luke’s arm.

“No, please. You have it. I’m all good,” Luke insisted. He knew Ashton’s brother didn’t believe him, but his brother also knew Luke well enough not to push. Luke was very grateful for how generous and sensitive Ashton’s family was. Ashton waited for Luke to get situated before he started working on his own food. 

“So Luke, in the things I’ve heard about you from our Ash, you’ve started picking up yoga?” Zara spoke up. He looked at her and smiled politely. 

“Uh, yeah. Ash got me into it a few months ago.”

“Cool! Y’know… I was the one that got Ash into it all those years ago. So glad to hear he’s still doing it and spreading the love,” she told him. Luke nodded, his mouth full. She’s just a friend, being friendly, he reminded himself. 

“Very cool. Uh… thanks, then, I guess,” Luke cringed at his own awkwardness. She smiled. 

“Any poses you like the most? That’s how I got Ash to really get into a habit of doing it. Starting with repeating his favorite poses,” Zara’s eye contact did not let up.

“Um… I like the cobra one and the triangle one. Anything that feels like a nice stretch,” Luke offered.

“I remember Ash’s favorites at the start were downward facing dog, standing forward bend, and the cat-cow stretch, right Ash?” Luke was suddenly picturing Ashton and Zara in those poses and wasn’t enjoying it one bit. Was he imagining things, or was she intentionally choosing all of the poses that could also be considered sex positions?

“Hm… I think those were your favorites. I do like the cat-cow one, but my other favorite was child’s pose,” Ashton answered as he brought a piece of chicken to his lips. Was this flirting? Luke wondered. He hadn’t had to flirt with a woman in a while.

“Oh, right…” Zara chuckled to herself like he had said something funny. He hadn’t said something funny. Not this time. 

“I remember you guys and that yoga stuff all those years ago,” Trish then started. She looked at Luke, “When Zara was first showing Ash what to do, he made all of these crazy noises because he wasn’t used to all of that stretching and whatnot. He’d exaggerate and make the noises extra loud and obnoxious. It was hilarious,” Trish put her hand on her chest as if to catch her breath. Luke nodded.

“Oh, gosh! Now I remember!” Ashton’s mum said. “Do you recall that time when Ash pulled his leg doing some crazier pose? I think him and Zara were in her room and the next thing we knew, he’d pulled his leg and he was in so much pain he was grunting and sweating and so red. We banned them from yoga for a week after that!” Ashton’s sister covered her mouth, eyes wide at that. Ashton’s hand had stopped rubbing Luke’s knee. Luke didn’t want to connect those dots.

“Jesus, Anne! Are you that naive?” Zara’s face turned red. Ashton’s brother began to laugh hysterically. Luke looked back down at his plate. If he didn’t acknowledge anyone, it wouldn’t be real, right?

“Oh, dear…” Ashton’s mum blushed and tried to hide her own face.

“I guess I am too,” Trish laughed. Ashton’s mum joined in.

“Yeah… not the smartest coverup for us, that one,” Zara tilted her head and laughed it off. She put her hand on Ashton’s shoulder.

“I mean, pretty smart if it lasted this long,” Ashton’s mum said.

“Alright, let’s change the topic of conversation, please!” Ashton did not think this was funny. He wore his weird sarcastic smile and squinty eyes that usually signaled he was about to blow up on everyone. Luke was never on the other side of that look. Zara removed her hand from Ashton’s shoulder.

The rest of the meal went along very nicely, actually. Luke and Ashton talked about the tour so far. His brother talked about finishing his schooling. His sister talked about her job and her boyfriend. Zara spoke about her job and her friends. Trish and Ashton’s mum recalled some vacation they took the previous August and how it ended with them somehow nearly getting lost in the middle of Melbourne. 

Luke enjoyed this group with a conversation like this. This was nice. This was nonthreatening. Except for the fact that Zara never spoke to him directly again. He felt cast aside from anything she had to say. But he was just imagining it, right? He must not have been paying enough attention.

Hours after their meal, a house tour, and some rest, everyone made their way into the backyard for a pool party. Calum, Michael, and Michael’s family were invited as well, and soon, the backyard was filled with music, food, laughter, Petunia, and squeals from Michael’s daughters. Luke finally felt settled for the first time since the arrival of Ashton’s family. 

He knew it was probably rude, but Luke excused himself from the main group to go and join Calum and Ashton’s brother over by the grill after only twenty minutes. Hearing Crystal and Zara go back and forth about LA beaches was not that exciting.

“Couldn’t handle the crowd?” Calum joked as soon as Luke sat down. Ashton’s brother laughed. Calum flipped some burgers.

“Very funny,” Luke huffed, “No, I just needed a little bit more quiet.”

“It’s easy to get overwhelmed by that lot,” Ashton’s brother read Luke’s mind. Luke nodded and smiled weakly.

“A bit. Everyone’s lovely, but I just feel like I’ve been reading everything wrong all afternoon.”

“Yeah, Z can be a lot sometimes. Lots of energy,” Calum’s voice got softer as he said it.

“Z? How close are you with her?” Luke furrowed his eyebrows. Was he the only person not understanding Zara’s vibe?

“Oh, we’ve met a few times back home. I met her before I even met Ash’s siblings,” Calum told him.

“Oh!”

“Don’t worry, Luke. She might say stuff, but she’s really nice in general,” Ashton’s brother said. Luke’s shoulders dropped.

“Does she usually say this kind of stuff? Like… alluding to being with Ash? Because he’s never told me anything about them being together or anything. He’s only ever had nice, general things to say. I can’t tell if she’s trying to loop me in to their past, or trying to make me jealous.”

“There’s nothing to be jealous of, Luke. Don’t worry about that,” Ashton’s brother reassured him. Luke’s lips twisted to the side, not knowing whether to believe him or not. 

“Yeah, I think they hooked up a few times as teenagers, like, before we ever got to London, but that was it,” Calum said. “I’m sorry you didn’t know this ahead of time. That’s sucky of Ash not to tell you.”

“But I think Ash didn’t tell me because I’d be like this,” Luke motioned to himself, “And he probably assumed it wouldn’t come up, because why would it?”

“Have you talked to him since lunch? He seemed really put off by her comments too,” Ashton’s brother asked. Luke shook his head.

“Not really. He did seem that way, though, didn’t he?” Luke looked down into his lap.

“If anything, I think Ash is almost embarrassed by her behavior, and he probably didn’t want to tell you because it would’ve deterred you from letting them stay,” Calum suggested. “But, to be clear, I still think he should’ve told you.”

“Yeah… kind of fucked…” Ashton’s brother said before taking a long sip of his drink.

“I think I’m reading too deep into this. I need to get over it and let Ash enjoy this time with everyone. I am not the focus this week,” Luke told them, but he was really telling himself.

“Oh, but you’re the focus every other week?” Calum teased. Luke rolled rolled his eyes and laughed.

“I mean… Ash really does love me, I think.”

“Yeah, we know. That’s why you shouldn’t be so insecure right now. Now, shoo! Go hang out with everyone else. Leave us to our quiet person conversation, you sook.” Calum waved his free hand at Luke and Ashton’s brother laughed again as Luke slowly separated himself from the pair and made his way back over to the group. 

He took the spot on the side of the pool in between Michael and Crystal. Crystal pulled Luke in for a side hug and let him rest his head on her shoulder for a minute and Luke tried to clue in on the conversation. He felt Ashton’s eyes, and then caught his warm smile in his peripheral. 

“And then he told me that I didn’t understand what he was saying, and so I stood up and I explained to him exactly how his scams worked, and that I had done that process two times before. Everyone knows that dealership is utter shit, but it’s the closest one to us! I don’t know how those businesses still operate like that. Especially now that you can order those fancy cars online,” Zara exclaimed. She was very animated while she spoke, both of her hands being used to explain her emotions. Ashton spoke like that too. Lots of people do, Luke. He had to remind himself.

“Oh, it was terrible!” Trish added, “And so we ended up booking it to the next place, which is much, much further away. Got the car there no problem.”

“Have to go there from now on, hm?” Ashton’s sister said.

“I definitely will be!” Zara rolled her eyes.

“What did you end up getting?” Michael asked. While everyone looked over at him, they also took in the sight of Luke leaning against Crystal. Luke immediately sat up and detached himself, self conscious. 

“A 2024 Kia Cerato,” Trish answered.

“Grey color,” Zara added.

“Oh, nice,” Michael smiled. 

“Luke and I are currently looking at some options for a new car,” Ashton started, “Nothing fancy. Just one for our everyday use.”

“What are you considering?” Ashton’s mum asked. 

“Well, for now, we’ve just done some online research. Looking at a BMW iX3, Mercedes-Benz GLC… just anything like that, really. 2025 or 26. Probably get it after the tour is done.”

“Makes sense,” his mum nodded.

“Have you boys seen the new electric cars?” Trish asked.

“We have one right now, and both of the options I listed are also electric or can be,” Ashton told her. Trish nodded.

“I drive a Tesla for our everyday car. It’s getting older now, so I might upgrade soon,” Michael said. 

“Oh! Do you like it?”

“Yeah, it’s worked for us,” Crystal smiled, “And the girls love the giant sun roof.”

“Speaking of a sun roof, did I tell you all that I’m getting a new apartment in August?” Zara asked, looking right at Ashton.

“Uh… no. Does it have a sun roof?” Ashton guessed.

“Yeah! Right over the kitchen. It’s lovely,” Zara’s cheeks turned pink. Luke could hear Trish and Ashton’s mum start their own quiet conversation.

“That’s nice,” Ashton said.

“What area of the city is it in? Or is it not…?” Michael asked. 

“Right in Paddington, actually! On a main road with some shops and whatnot.”

“Oh, I don’t think I’m familiar with Paddington…”

“It’s just next to Surry Hills and Moore Park.”

“Oh, Moore Park. That’s nice, then,” Michael grinned.

“It’s like a ten minute drive from the bay,” Ashton’s sister added. 

“Sounds very nice, Zara,” Crystal said, turning her head to look at her daughters playing with the dog in the grass a few feet away. The girls were dressed in their swimsuits and water wings, but preferred Petunia’s company for now. 

“It is, it really is,” Zara’s smile was very big, Luke noticed. Ashton says I have a big, beautiful smile.

“Is it near to your job?” Luke decided to speak up so that he at least seemed interested in the conversation. She didn’t answer, so he asked again, a little louder, “Is it near your job?”

“Very. Fifteen minute drive. Opposite direction from the bay,” Zara answered in short, blunt sentences. Luke nodded and looked down at his feet in the water. Ashton started moving around in the pool and made his way over to Luke’s legs. Ashton kissed Luke’s knee before turning around and using Luke’s legs as a back rest. Luke moved his hand into Ashton’s hair and began to massage his scalp. Ashton’s eyes closed at the feeling.

“Oh, that’s really nice,” Ashton’s sister said. Luke then heard Michael lean behind him and whisper at Crystal to get in the pool and relax. She hesitated, but then Michael assured her that his focus would be on the girls only, and she nodded and hopped in, next to Ashton. Crystal moved a little closer to Zara, Ashton’s sister, and the mums.

“Do you need anything, Ash?” Luke asked his boyfriend softly. Ashton turned and looked up at Luke.

“Gimme kiss,” he pointed to his lips. Luke giggled and leaned down to meet him halfway. They shared a quick kiss before pulling apart again.

“But do you want anything to eat? Drink? I think the food should be done soo—”

“—Food is ready!” Calum yelled out. 

“Do you want me to get you any of it?” Luke tried again. Ashton laughed, his eyes still on Luke’s lips.

“A burger, please. If they’re the smaller sliders, two of those. Put on whatever toppings you think I’d like.”

“You know what toppings we have. This is our house,” Luke smiled. He eyed Ashton’s mustache that he was letting start to really grow in.

“Oh, yeah. Okay, lettuce, tomatoes, the cheese is already on them?”

“I think so. They’re cheeseburgers.”

“Okay. Lettuce, tomatoes, onions, pickles, and some ketchup and mayo. Please,” Ashton kissed Luke’s knee again.

“Drink?”

“A soda, please. Any is fine.”

“Okay!” 

“Thanks so much, Baby. You’re the best.”

“I know,” Luke joked as he got up from the poolside and headed over to the grill. He was the first over there. He thanked Calum and prepared a shared plate for him and Ashton. Two large burgers, one with lettuce, tomatoes, onions, pickles, ketchup, and mayo. The other with lettuce, onions, onions, and ketchup. Some doritos, some potato chips, four small strawberries, and two cokes. He slowly walked the heavy plate back over to the poolside. 

Ashton was now sitting where Luke had been before, only is legs in the water. He had a towel over his shoulders. Luke plopped down next to him and motioned to their plate.

“Oh, Baby. This looks glorious. Thank you!”

“Thank Cal,” Luke told him.

“Thanks Cal!” Ashton yelled out. Calum turned and gave him a thumbs up. Ashton opened both of their drinks for them before pulling Luke closer into his side so that their plate rested on each of their thighs. “Time to feast!” 

“Mhm…” Luke hummed, already taking his first bite. Luke was happy to eat the same thing as everyone else this time.

The backyard got pretty quiet, the music from the speaker being the loudest thing next to Michael and Crystal’s daughters squealing and playing. While everyone ate, Calum and Ashton’s brother joined the majority.

As the sun finally set, Michael, Crystal, and the girls said goodbye, the kids having a pretty strict bedtime so that there wouldn’t be any meltdowns. Luke could tell that Michael was pretty tired, too. And Crystal, but she was a strong woman who didn’t show it.

“Luke, how often do you guys use the pool?” Zara asked. Half of the group was now on some of the lounge chairs, the other still in the pool. Luke was in the pool now, submerged until about his shoulders, and Ashton stood behind him, his arms around him like a barricade holding him to the wall. Ashton’s head, rested on Luke’s shoulder. Calum stood beside them, as did Ashton’s siblings. 

Ashton’s mum and Trish were working on some ice creams, while Zara had a fruity popsicle. Luke decided to work on a few cubes of watermelon instead, the fruit being extra ripe and tasty for the first time this season.

“Uh… well we’ve tried to almost every day since we’ve been home, but sometimes we’re busy.”

“If I had this pool, I’d use it every single day,” Zara said. Ashton felt Luke’s shoulder drop slightly.

“Well, we, uh… we try! I mean, before the tour started, it was still being shocked pretty regularly because the old house owners didn’t do a good job with the upkeep. And then we’ve been gone until now, so, uh…” Luke struggled to find an excuse while he rambled, not wanting Zara to think he’s ungrateful for such a luxury. The last thing he’d want Ashton’s family and friends to think was that he was a spoiled, ungrateful brat.

“Even after a long busy day, I’d try to find the time…” Zara scoffed. “Not everyone just gets to have stuff like this, y’know?”

“We really try! Sometimes we’re just so tired after a long day. But if there ever is a good time, we do use it,” Luke said. He felt his face burning. He was confused with himself at his own desperation to explain this to her.

“What? Busy being pop stars and doing whatever you want? Oh, the pain! Oh, the exhaustion!” 

“Zara! What the fuck?” Ashton removed himself from Luke’s back and went to the edge of the pool to confront her.

“What? Am I wrong?”

“Yes! Of course we get to do nice things and have nice things, and we don’t have the same work schedule as everyone else, but we still, and especially Luke, work hard! He said we used this pool as often as we could! Isn’t that enough for you?” Ashton’s arm moved in front of Luke as if to guard him.

“I still think your work is a poor excuse,” Zara’s popsicle started to drip all over her thighs. 

“We risked a lot leaving home, Z. A lot. And it happened to work out for us, after a lot of hard work and personal struggles. This wasn’t nothing to us, you know?” Ashton motioned to the house. “This was mine and Luke’s saved money, our dedication to one another. This was our hard work. And we’re grateful for all of this every second we’re alive!”

“Won’t you share the wealth with the people who have always supported you, then?”

“I’ve invited you out to LA for years! Years! And you’ve rejected me every. Single. Time. I tried, Z! But you always said no. Or not yet.” Everyone had stopped their private conversations and was now very much tuned in to the argument. Luke was embarrassed he could’t have just stood up to Zara himself.

“Well you always—”

“—And always supported me? No you haven’t! When we were about to leave for London, you told me that it was the dumbest idea ever. You said we weren’t good enough to make it. And then you came to the One Direction show in Melbourne and acted like everything was great. Like you hadn’t said that to me.”

“Oh, come on, Ash. We were teenagers!”

“So what? We weren’t eight years old! You knew full well what you said and you meant it. What you said hurt me deeply. And I still invited you to LA. For years I’ve invited you here.”

“Ash, you’re so angry. You sure Luke’s helping your mental health?” Zara asked, now grasping onto anything that would give her leverage, whether it was nice or not. Ashton’s sister and mum had gasped. Trish had covered her mouth and cowered, embarrassed by her own daughter’s behavior. Ashton’s brother started getting out of the pool.

“Fuck you, Zara. You know this has nothing to do with Luke.”

“Fuck me? Oh, like you wanted to earlier?” Luke felt repulsed and started backing away from Ashton. He didn’t want to believe a word she said, but he still felt his heart drop to his stomach.

“What? What the hell are you talking about?” Ashton was angry beyond belief now. Luke had only ever seen him this way one other time, right before he got into a fight at a pub in Manchester way back in 2018.

“When we were talking about yoga? Yeah… I wasn’t talking about yoga,” Zara moved her eyes so that what she was saying was directed at Luke, who then immediately moved his own eyes down so that he could dissasociate. Luke heard both mums curse.

“I was actually talking about yoga, Zara. We actually used to do yoga. Now that I think about it… you purposely got my old favorite poses wrong, too. Why the fuck would you think that was okay? Not just in front of our families, but my partner? Luke has done nothing. Nothing. And you come to our house and try to embarrass him in front of everyone.” Luke wants to leave the premises immediately, but his wet, black hair was doing an okay enough job acting as curtains.

“Yeah, well I don’t think Luke’s good for you, Ash.”

“What?”

“He’s exactly what you’ve never wanted to deal with. He’s big, he’s clingy, he’s timid. He could never protect you. Look at him now! He’s trying to hide from me right now!”

“Zara—”

“—He’s a man!”

“So now you’re just homophobic.”

“No! But you’ve always wanted kids and a wife and stability and someone you could proudly show off. And he’s a man, who is in your band, so I assume you won’t show him off. And he’s clearly also fucked in the head if he’s dressing and acting like that. C’mon, Ash! What happened to hooking up with any girl who moved? You seemed a lot happier then!” Luke had tears streaming down his face, so he kept still. 

The mums were escorted inside by Calum, who had been itching to intervene, but was smart enough not to. Ashton’s brother started putting the food away so that he could be near and prepared to fight, but also not close enough to lash out and make a mistake. Ashton’s sister moved over to Luke and held his hand, allowing Luke not to look up or move but still receive some comfort.

“You’re being fucking ridiculous. I can’t believe you’d say something like that to us. You sound like a fucking asshole.”

“Well, am I wrong?”

“Yes! You’re so wrong! You couldn’t be further from the truth! I’ve never been set on kids… and in the last decade, a wife. I love Luke with everything in me, and if you think he’s not good for me, you don’t know me at all. He is the best thing that has ever happened to me. You sound fucking stupid speaking to me like that.”

“And what about showing him off?”

“Who the fuck cares? Maybe one day we will come out, but for now, we’re the happiest we have ever been, just living our life how we want it. And fuck you for criticizing anything about Luke. He is so perfect and so happy and beautiful, and if you see anything other than that, then maybe open your eyes. You don’t know us, Zara. And you’ve rejected any opportunity to get to know us.”

“Luke’s using you, by the way,” Zara may have been starting to run out of amo.

“Using me? For what, exactly?”

“He’s using you for your caretaking because he’s clearly a recovering alcoholic, just like you.”

“What the hell do you think you know about Luke? You know nothing. Absolutely nothing. And it’s embarrassing that you’re making up lies now to try and hurt me.” Luke didn’t like any of this, and he was ashamed that Ashton had to lie to cover Luke’s ass.

“Oh, sorry. Not an alcoholic? A crackhead, then. I remember what twitter was like ten years ago. Not pretty, Luke.” Luke didn’t respond. Ashton’s sister tried getting him to go inside, but Luke refused to move, panicked in place.

“You know nothing, Zara. I’d stop talking before you embarrass yourself any further.”

“Then stop talking, Ash. Admit I’m right.”

“Right about what?”

“About how you should never have left home! Look at this! You’re defending some poor excuse for a man like you actually love having to put up with all of his shit. You come from a poor town, Ash. You were meant to have a normal job, a wife, kids… people like us don’t get to leave. And you put up with anything so that you can pretend you deserve any ounce of this.”

“You sound jealous,” Ashton huffed.

“I’m not jealous. I’m telling the truth. Hey, Luke! Your boyfriend used to fuck me in his childhood bedroom and tell me we’d get married some day. You going to cry about that too?” Ashton wanted to fight, but he restrained himself. Ashton’s sister, on the other hand, sprinted out of the pool and slapped Zara across the face. The sound was frightening. Luke started to shiver.

“Get the fuck out of my house.” Ashton ordered. Zara was still coming back from the slap, her face red. She had no time to even process getting slapped when Ashton’s voice boomed so loudly.

“What? No.”

“Zara. Get the fuck out.”

“I have nowhere to go.”

“I don’t care.”

“Yes, you do. Because deep down, I know you still love me.”

“Zara.”

“Admit it, Ash.”

“I’m not fucking in love with you.”

“Sure.”

“And get the fuck out!”

“He used to tell me that he loved me, Luke. And that he’d come back one day and marry me.”

“Zara. I’ll ask one more time.”

“And then what? I’ll fucking beat you up.”

“Leave.”

“I’ll fucking beat Luke up to. He’ll just sit there and take it.”

“Okay, I’m calling the cops.”

“What? No you’re not.”

“You’ve officially threatened multiple people with violence, with multiple witnesses. I can call the cops now.”

“Ash, stop being stupid.”

“Then get out.”

“Okay!”

“Get the fuck out of my fucking house!” Ashton screamed. Zara stood up and marched inside, throwing what was left of her popsicle into the pool, towards Luke. In the windows, Ashton and his siblings watched as Zara ran through the house screaming. Trish tried to confront her, but she ultimately grabbed her bags and left. Where to? Nobody outside knew. 

Ashton stood still, catching his breath. Ashton’s siblings quietly went inside with towels and the food leftovers.

“I’m so sorry, Luke,” was the first thing Ashton said. Luke finally looked up. His eyes were red. He was shaking violently. “I’m so, so sorry. I let that get way out of hand and I shouldn’t have kept going. I’m so sorry.”

“Ash…” Luke’s voice was nearly nonexistent.

“Baby…” Ashton went over to Luke and engulfed him in a hug. Luke sobbed into Ashton’s chest.

“Why was she so angry at me?” No words would justify any of this for Luke’s brain, but he asked anyway.

“I don’t know, Lu. It was not fair of her.”

“Was she ever like this before?”

“Never this extreme, Lu. I would’ve never invited her here if I knew she was going to be anything but her usually friendly self. I’m so sorry I ever let it get out of proportion like this.”

“It’s not your fault, Ash. Thank you for standing up for me,” Luke moved his jittery lips to Ashton’s jaw and kissed it. 

“It’s my life’s mission to protect you, Luke. Don’t ever think I won’t protect you.”

“I love you.”

“I love you so fucking much, Luke. Don’t believe anything she said about me and her. But I can tell you the truth if you ever want it.” Luke nodded. 

“Tell me now. I want to know and then never think about any of this every again.” Ashton hesitated. Everything was too fresh, too tense. But if Luke wanted to just get it over with, then he would give that to Luke.

“Okay… well we did, y’know… lose it, our virginities… to each other. And we bonded over yoga, and hiking, and biking, and swimming. But she and I did hook up quite a bit back then.”

“How old?”

“Fifteen. We were fifteen, which now seems way too young, but… that’s what happened. And maybe at the time I thought it was love. But now that I know what it feels like to be in love, I know it wasn’t that,” Ashton whispers.

“And the marriage thing?”

“She talked down on me and my music stuff so much, I was convinced I’d be back home after everything we did and I’d probably just marry her. It had almost been expected of us, by our families. But plans change, and I’m so grateful they did.” They stood in silence.

“Me too.”

“I’m so sorry, Luke.”

“You didn’t know.”

“I didn’t,” Ashton’s voice waivered. 

“Do you think she’s going to leave and go home?”

“I have no idea. I don’t know if she knows anyone else who lives here. Let’s try not to think about it, though, okay?”

“Yeah.” They kissed properly now, and the shaking of Luke’s body, while still definitely happening, was not so intense.

“Let’s go shower, maybe find a snack, and sleep. You shower first and I’ll talk to everyone.” It was so like Ashton to go through something like this and then turn around and take care of everyone else. Had he even had a moment to process what just happened?

“Ash, Love, are you alright?” Luke put his hands on Ashton’s cheeks.

“I’m okay, Lu. A little shaken up, but I’m okay.”

“And you’ll let me know if you’re not?” Ashton hesitated, but then nodded.

“Of course. And Luke?”

“Yeah?”

“You are the most beautiful and perfect person for me, okay?” Luke laughed, relieved.

“Ash, I love you so much.”

“I love you so much, Lu. I’m so sorry anyone has ever questioned that.” Luke shook his head.

“Did you mean what you said about maybe coming out one day?”

“Uh… if you ever considered it. And we’d obviously have to talk to management and our publicists… and rearrange our whole lives. But, just know, if you ever wanted to, I would consider it.”

“Okay. I don’t know how I feel about that, but I’ll tell you if I ever do have an inkling.”

“Perfect, Lu. You’re so good to me.”

“You’re my person, Ash.”

“Oh, god,” Ashton started to cry. He hid his face in Luke’s shoulder. The couple held each other for a few more minutes before heading in, following their original plan.

Luke went straight for the showers. Ashton found everyone in the dining room, around the table, speaking softly. Trish’s eyes were red as if she had been crying. Nobody even noticed Ashton until he cleared his throat.

“Oh, Ash… is everything alright?” His mum asked. Ashton gave her the best grin he could.

“We’re a little shaken up, but we’re alright,” he told them, “Luke’s gone to the bathroom to get ready for bed.”

“Okay, Dear. Well, Zara is planning to get a hotel room somewhere near Burbank, but she’s flying home tomorrow.”

“Has she left?” 

“Yeah. Took a cab.” Trish said. “Ash, I’m so sorry for all of this. I’m so ashamed of her behavior.”

“Trish, it’s not your fault. None of us saw it coming,” Ashton put his hand on her shoulder. 

“And poor Luke… he didn’t deserve any of those remarks. What even got into her?” Trish said before taking a sip of water.

“Well, whatever it was, it’s out of her system now,” Ashton’s sister said. 

“Does anyone want anything? Drink? Food?” Calum asked, pointing towards the kitchen. Ashton nearly forgot Calum had been here at all tonight, choosing to stay pretty quiet compared to his normal demeanor. He was also glad the Cliffords had left. Their daughters did not need to witness such distress.

“I’ll have more water, Cal. Please,” Trish said. Calum nodded before excusing himself to the kitchen.

“And you guys let me know if you need anything else, okay? The remainder of this week will be good,” Ashton said. Trish then smiled sadly.

“Ash, I’ll be catching the same flight home as Zara. I don’t think she’s a danger to herself or anything, but I’ll be getting her help,” Trish told him. Ashton’s body deflated in disappointment.

“Okay, Trish. That’s— I wish you could’ve stayed.”

“I know. Me too. I’ll be back one day. Without Zara,” she tried to joke, but it didn’t really land. 

“Well, enjoy your night here, and I’ll take you to the airport tomorrow?”

 “Sounds good. Thanks, Ash.” Ashton nodded.

“Well, we will start getting ready for bed then, too,” Ashton’s mum got up from the table. The group left the room, except for his sister.

“Hey, Ash?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry I slapped her. I shouldn’t have, but I just couldn’t let her talk that way about you two anymore. I’m embarrassed I chose violence. I’ll never do it again,” she apologized like she did even when she was little. She explained her reasoning and she took full responsibility. Ashton hated it when they were younger because she always sounded so much more intelligent. But now Ashton was almost emotional about it. She was a strong woman with her own values and feelings. Ashton couldn’t blame her. Not when she was sticking up for his family.

“You did nothing wrong. I’m proud of you. And I’m grateful. She probably would not have stopped if you didn’t do something. So, thank you,” Ashton pulled her in for a tight hug. Moments like this reminded him of how little time he had spent with his siblings since they were so young. “I’m going to try and visit more. And I hope you try too. I miss you so much. Constantly.”

“We miss you always, Ash. But your life is here. Your dreams are real here. We’d never take that away from you,” she looked up at him. “And Luke is so, so good for you. And you’re good for him. Don’t you ever think otherwise,” she told him.

“When did you grow up?” Ashton’s eyes watered.

“When I had to become the woman of the house,” she laughed. Ashton chuckled at that.

“Every house needs a strong woman, hm?”

“Yeah. That’s why Petunia takes advantage of you,” she pushes his chest before starting to leave the room. “Night, Ash.”

“Night. Text me if anything.”

“‘Kay. Love ya.”

“Love ya,” Ashton watched her leave. He took a deep breath. He turned the light off and went into the kitchen. Calum stood there with a glass of water and some crackers.

“So I’m guessing Trish doesn’t want this water, then?” Calum asked. Ashton laughed.

“Yeah, probably not. Everyone’s off to bed,” Ashton told him. Calum then took a sip from the glass. 

“That woman is a fucking psychopath,” he said as if Ashton wasn’t already aware of what had happened.

“I’d never seen her like this before,” Ashton told him, “She was unhinged.”

“And what was the whole thing about yoga? I overheard something…”

“When we were teenagers, we used to do yoga. Her old stepdad had a bunch of DVDs with yoga classes on them, and we’d do those every day during the school year. But she used it as a cover word for when we used to hook up. And I was stupid because I had forgotten to tell Luke about our past before they arrived. We were so busy preparing for everyone to get here that it completely slipped my mind.”

“He was a bit insecure about that earlier, by the way.”

“What?”

“When he was talking to me and H earlier, he was overwhelmed with his insecurities, but he had put on a really brave face. Make sure to comfort him about that. Tell him he wasn’t crazy and such.”

“Oh. Yeah. Will do. Thanks, Cal.” Calum nodded at that.

“Well, I think I’ll head out.”

“We have an air mattress if you want to stay.”

“No, no. I’ll head out. I got my own perfectly good bed only twenty minutes away,” Calum smiled. 

“Okay, Cal. Thanks for dinner. Thanks for… everything,” Ashton sighed, pulling in his younger bandmate for a hug.

“Of course, Ash. And I don’t plan on telling Mike and Crys if you don’t. We can say they left because of an emergency. They don’t need more reasons to avoid us these days.”

“They don’t avoid us, Cal. They have kids!” Ashton chuckled.

“Oh, excuses, excuses,” Calum said sarcastically. They pulled away and waved as Calum left. Ashton tidied up the kitchen so that he could just shower and get into bed with Luke, which he now only remembered was the pull-out couch. He sighed, knowing he wouldn’t get the best sleep. After cleaning the kitchen, he prepared the couch for them, making sure to grab Luke’s favorite fluffy blanket and his thermal socks.

Luke appeared in the living room in his pajamas a few minutes later. Ashton pulled him in for a kiss and then a hug.

“Get settled, Darlin’. I’ll shower and join you soon.” Luke already looked much better. There was only a small dark cloud over him now, but nothing he couldn’t see through.

“Okay,” Luke’s voice was deep with exhaustion. Petunia hopped onto the mattress as soon as Luke got settled, and moved her body so that her head was by Luke’s knees. Ashton smiled at the sight before going to the bathroom.

Once Ashton was done in the shower, with a prepared reassuring speech for Luke and all, he came out to his very much asleep partner and grinned. At least Luke could rest soundly. If Ashton wasn’t going to be able to talk to Luke properly tonight, he would use the time to reflect. But even his brain, which seemed to rarely shut off, was tired. He settled for actually going to bed.

“Love you,” he whispered to Luke, knowing he wouldn’t get a response. Luke didn’t react whatsoever, but the peacefulness of the sight was enough for Ashton to join him in dreamland within five minutes. 

The rest of the week went by wonderfully. 

Trish left with more apologies that Ashton continued to shut down. Ashton got to spend the week with just his family. His mum, his siblings, Luke, Calum, and the Cliffords. He couldn’t have asked for a better time with everyone post-Zara.

Beaches, fun restaurants, board games, and countless hours by the pool. Ashton almost forgot they were back on the road in a few weeks, and that this wasn’t forever. 

As he dropped his mum and siblings back off at the airport the following Saturday, a tearful goodbye accompanied the bunch, Ashton’s mum crying as she hugged Luke. 

The couple’s ride home was peaceful and satisfying. They still had a few more weeks to rest before the tour started back up again, and the jet lag wouldn’t be as bad because it was the North American leg. Everything was exciting.

“I’m so glad we had this time with everyone,” Luke said, looking out his passenger-side window.

“Me too. After that first day, everything was just perfect.”

“It really was.”

“And I never want to see Zara again,” Ashton said. Luke giggled.

“I don’t think most people do,” Luke grabbed Ashton’s hand. 

“I love you, Lu. So much.” Ashton squeezed his hand.

“I love you, Ash. No matter what people say to us, I will continue to love you so much,” Luke usually thought it was quite cheesy when Ashton professed his love for Luke so bluntly and consistently, but then again, he had never been loved like this before. Despite being private, he was loved so loudly.

“I’m excited for tour to start back up again. And MSG? We sold it out again! I’m so proud of us…” Ashton’s voice faded out a bit as Luke watched him speak. Luke knew where Ashton had come from, where he was raised. He had met Ashton so early on in his life. He had basically grown up with him, and then, even after a lot of back and forth and hesitation, had the privilege to fall in love with him. Ashton was good for him.

He just hoped Ashton really believed that Luke was good enough for him, too.