Chapter Text
Once Upon a Time, a different timeline happened.
In alternate weave of fate, the Gem known as Rose Quartz never gave up her physical form to birth a half-human child. Steven Universe simply did not exist. Rose Quartz—tall, curvaceous, with voluminous pink curls cascading like wild roses in bloom—remained the steadfast leader of the Crystal Gems, her shield ever ready to protect the Earth she had come to love so fiercely. The rebellion had ended millennia ago, leaving the planet scarred but free, and the remaining Crystal Gems—Pearl, Garnet, and Amethyst—continued their quiet vigil from the ancient temple on the beach.
But tragedy had struck in the years that followed. Amethyst, the playful, shape-shifting Quartz who had emerged "overcooked" from the Prime Kindergarten on Earth, had always been the wild heart of the group. Her laughter echoed through the temple halls, her pranks lightened even the heaviest days, and her boundless energy reminded the others of the joy worth fighting for. Yet, in a moment of profound curiosity and defiance against Gemkind's rigid rules, Amethyst had chosen to experiment with something utterly forbidden: organic reproduction. Drawing on her inherited shapeshifting abilities and the lingering essence of Earth's life forces that Gems like her could sometimes tap into, she had carried and given birth to a hybrid child—a boy with human fragility wrapped in Gem potential.
The act drained her beyond recovery. Her gemstone, that faceted purple heart embedded in her chest, cracked under the strain of bridging two incompatible worlds. Amethyst poofed one final time, her light form flickering weakly before dissipating entirely. She became inactive—shattered in spirit if not in stone—leaving behind only her gem, carefully preserved in the Burning Room, and her newborn son. The Crystal Gems mourned her deeply; Rose, in particular, carried the weight of guilt, wondering if her own fascination with humans had inspired Amethyst's fatal choice. The boy's father remained a mystery—perhaps a fleeting human encounter Amethyst had never fully explained, or something more ethereal tied to her shapeshifting whims. In honor of his mother, they named him Clarence Amethyst Wendle, though the world would come to know him simply as Clarence Wendle.
Clarence grew up in the shadow of the Crystal Temple, raised collectively by Rose, Pearl, and Garnet in the quirky town of Beach City (though his human side pulled him toward the nearby suburb of Aberdale for school and friends). He was a round-faced, optimistic boy with a mop of dark blonde hair, boundless enthusiasm, and an infectious laugh that could turn any mundane day into an adventure. But beneath his sunny disposition ran the purple veins of his Gem heritage: Amethyst's gemstone, now embedded in his chest like a pendant he could never remove, granted him the ability to shapeshift into animal forms—snakes, raccoons, hawks, beavers, and more. He favored these shifts when emotions ran high, finding comfort in the instincts of beasts over the complexities of his half-human heart.
On this particular morning, the sun rose over the beach house as it always did, casting golden light through the warped windows of the temple. Clarence, still stinging from words he'd overheard the night before, slithered down the stairs in the form of a sleek cobra snake—hood flared dramatically, scales a shimmering purple-green hue that echoed his mother's gem. His forked tongue flicked out in pure, venomous irritation as he coiled his long body around the table leg with exaggerated pissed-off flair, making his way to the kitchen for breakfast.
He had been pretending to sleep in his room when Pearl, ever the meticulous one, had been tidying up late into the night. In a hushed conversation with Garnet—thinking the boy was fully asleep—Pearl had sighed deeply and murmured something about Clarence's default humanoid appearance being "disgusting" compared to a proper Gem form. She hadn't meant it cruelly; Pearl's standards were exacting, rooted in Homeworld's perfectionism, and hybrids were... messy to her sensibilities. But the word had pierced Clarence like a spear. Disgusting. His round cheeks, his human softness, the way he ate and laughed and cried—all of it, disgusting to Auntie Pearl.
So now, as he shifted partially back to reach for his cereal bowl—still mostly cobra for the maximum dramatic effect—he poured the milk with agonizing slowness, his serpentine jaws unhinging in mock delicacy as he chewed each spoonful like it was a performance art piece titled "How to Eat Without Being Gross."
Pearl noticed first, her sharp eyes narrowing in that prim, pointed way as Clarence dragged out every bite for what felt like an eternity.
"Clarence, dear, what's wrong?" Pearl asked, her voice dripping with that overly concerned tone she reserved for schedule disruptions. "You're eating so... deliberately today. Is there a problem?"
Clarence paused, his tongue flicking out with theatrical slowness before he murmured in a low, hissy drawl laced with venom, "Oh, nothing at all, Auntie Pearl. I just figured eating fast would be... utterly disgusting. Wouldn't want to offend anyone's delicate sensibilities, now would we?"
The sarcasm slithered through the air like poison, thick and unmistakable, but Pearl blinked, tilting her head in genuine bewilderment. She completely missed the jab, her mind whirring through possibilities like spoiled milk or improper nutrition. "Well... yes, manners are quite important, of course, but you're usually so... enthusiastically devouring your meals. Are you feeling ill?"
Before Clarence could deliver another biting hiss, Garnet entered from the warp pad room, her visor glinting as she picked up on the tense vibes rippling through the house like a bad future vision. The fusion Gem, calm as ever but with a subtle edge of curiosity, folded her arms and asked politely, "Did Belson mock you again?"
Clarence's cobra form recoiled sharply, hood flaring wide in outright offense. Belson Noles—the snarky rich kid with the scowl—was no real enemy; sure, he tossed barbs, but to Clarence, he was just a "specific one," the kind of friend who grumbled through adventures but always tagged along. The suggestion that Belson's words could actually sting was insulting in itself.
With a shimmer of purple light and a dramatic flourish, Clarence shifted into a fluffy raccoon form—masked face scrunched in disdain, ringed tail lashing. He scrambled onto the table with tiny paws, crossing his arms defiantly. "Oh wow, yeah, totally," he chittered sarcastically, voice dripping with mock hurt. "Belson called me a weirdo and I just shattered into a million pieces. Nope. Not even close."
Pearl pinched the bridge of her nose—where a nose would be on a Gem—and let out an exasperated sigh that could have powered a wind turbine. "Honestly, Clarence, why can't you just behave like your best friend, Jeff? He's so neat, so proper—so unlike certain chaotic individuals I could mention."
Jeff Randell, the square-headed neat-freak with his endless facts and hygiene obsession, was clearly Pearl's golden child among Clarence's friends. Sumo was barely tolerated. Clarence didn't truly mind the favoritism—Jeff was great in his nerdy way—but the comparison still jabbed like a thorn, especially today.
Clarence's raccoon ears flattened, but he nibbled on a cereal piece with over-the-top dainty paws, muttering under his breath, "Yeah, because being a perfect little square is just so exciting. Sign me up for that life."
Finally, Pearl straightened up with a sharp clap, all business. "Enough of this nonsense. There's a mission today—a corrupted Gem sighting in a forested realm nearby. Garnet sensed it last night. Clarence, you're attending as well. Consider it... essential training."
Clarence eyed Pearl with a bitter raccoon glare, his masked face twisting into pure snark as he hopped down and scampered toward the warp pad, tail bushy with attitude. Still fully 'coon, he didn't bother shifting back.
Rose Quartz entered just then, her pink curls bouncing as she offered her warm, motherly smile. "Clarence, sweetie, you could turn back to your humanoid form for the warp. It might be more... comfortable?"
The boy paused on the glowing platform, looking up with those big, expressive raccoon eyes gleaming with defiance. He chittered in a gruff, exaggeratedly folksy tone, "Oh, hold your stinkin' horses there, m'lady. I'll manage just fine, thank you very much. Wouldn't want to rush and do something... disgusting."
The warp pad activated in a swirl of light, transporting them to the different "realm"—a dense, ancient forest far from Beach City, thick with towering trees and misty undergrowth, where corrupted Gems sometimes wandered, drawn by lingering Kindergarten energies.
As soon as they materialized on the forest warp pad, Clarence's form shimmered dramatically. He leaped into the air, transforming mid-jump into a sharp-eyed hawk—wings spreading wide with a flourish, talons extended, feathers a mix of brown and purple sheen. He soared upward with a piercing, mocking screech, circling above the treetops like he owned the sky.
Pearl, already scanning the area with her spear summoned, looked up in peak confused annoyance. "A hawk now!? Really? Don't be like Sumo with all this reckless impulsivity!"
The comparison to his wild, bald-headed chaos-machine friend only amped up Clarence's bitterness. He screeched once more—long, drawn-out, and dripping with avian sarcasm—before diving deeper into the woods, scouting ahead with exaggerated flair.
The group pressed on: Rose leading with her shield at the ready, Garnet's future vision guiding their path, Pearl fretting over every improper protocol. They tracked signs of the corrupted Gem—uprooted trees, strange claw marks—until they stumbled upon it: Clarence, shifted into a sturdy beaver form, busily gnawing at fallen logs with overzealous buck teeth and stacking them into a makeshift dam passage across a small stream. His flat tail slapped the water with playful splashes, turning the serious hunt into his personal chaotic playground as if to say, "Mission? What mission?"
The corrupted Gem—a hulking, twisted fusion remnant lurking nearby—had yet to notice them. But Clarence, in his beaver bliss, was already engineering the forest into a sarcastic masterpiece of defiance…
Rose Quartz sighed softly, her massive shield summoned but resting at her side as she watched the boy. "Clarence, we need to focus. The corrupted Gem's energy signature is close—Garnet can feel it getting agitated."
Garnet, visor gleaming under the dappled sunlight, nodded calmly. "It's drawn to the noise. Coming fast."
Pearl, spear already in hand, paced with mounting frustration. "Clarence! Stop this ridiculous fort-building nonsense and help us scout properly! We don't have time for your... your beaver whims!"
From his dam, Clarence's beaver form paused mid-gnaw, dark eyes glinting with bitter amusement. He chittered sarcastically—a high-pitched, drawn-out squeak that somehow translated to pure snark—before slapping his tail once more, sending a spray of water toward Pearl's pristine boots. She dodged with a yelp.
Then it emerged.
A low, guttural roar shook the leaves from the trees as the corrupted Gem burst into the clearing—a hulking, twisted remnant of what might once have been a Quartz soldier fused with something far worse. Its form was a nightmarish amalgamation: massive armored plates like a corrupted Biggs Jasper, spiked with jagged orange-brown protrusions reminiscent of Ocean Jasper's chaotic patterns, but warped into a feral, multi-limbed beast. Tentacle-like appendages whipped from its sides, ending in claw-tipped suckers, while its central body lurched on four powerful legs, gemstone embedded crookedly in its chest like a festering wound. Acidic drool hissed against the forest floor, corroding roots and leaves alike. It was aggressive, disoriented—pure feral instinct, charging straight toward the noise of Clarence's playful destruction.
Pearl's eyes widened. "It's a fusion corruption! Look at the limbs—stay together!"
Rose planted her shield firmly. "Crystal Gems, formation! Protect Clarence!"
Garnet cracked her gauntlets together with a resonant boom. "On it."
The beast lunged first at the dam, mistaking it for prey—or perhaps drawn to the purple shimmer of Clarence's gem peeking through his beaver fur. One tentacle whipped out, smashing logs aside and sending Clarence tumbling into the stream with a splash. He surfaced, shaking water from his whiskers, and without a hint of urgency, his form shimmered in purple light.
In a dramatic flourish—because why not make it theatrical?—Clarence transformed into a majestic stag. Antlers branching wide and proud, coat a deep earthy brown with subtle purple highlights along the racks, hooves sturdy on the muddy bank. He stood tall, shaking off the water like a dog for extra effect, then simply... trotted aside. Grazed on a nearby fern. Ignored the rampaging monster entirely.
The corrupted fusion roared again, redirecting its fury toward the Gems. A tentacle lashed at Pearl, who parried with her spear in a blur of graceful spins, holographic afterimages trailing her movements.
"Take this!" Pearl thrust forward, spear piercing one appendage and poofing a chunk of light form away in a puff of smoke. The beast howled, swinging its massive plated arm like a battering ram.
Garnet met it head-on, gauntlets clashing against the armor in a shockwave that uprooted small trees. "Future vision says... left hook!" She dodged a claw swipe and countered with a rocket-powered uppercut, cracking the corrupted plating and sending the monster staggering back.
Rose charged in, shield bashing to create openings. "We've got this—bubble it quickly!"
But the beast was relentless, regenerating minor damage with corrupted light, its tentacles multiplying in a frenzy. One coiled toward Garnet's legs; she smashed it, but another grazed her side, drawing a grunt. Pearl leaped in, spear dancing in rapid stabs—slice, parry, thrust—keeping the appendages at bay while yelling orders.
"Garnet, flank it! Rose, shield wall—it's going for the stream!"
All the while, Clarence the stag pranced leisurely around the periphery. He lowered his majestic head to nibble at some moss on a fallen log, antlers glinting as he casually sidestepped a stray tentacle that whipped too close. No charging in with those impressive racks. No ramming the beast. No aggressive attacks whatsoever. Just... existing. Majestically indifferent.
The corrupted Gem barreled toward Pearl next, jaws unhinging to reveal rows of jagged, gem-fused teeth dripping corruption. Pearl backflipped elegantly, summoning multiple holographic clones to confuse it, then drove her spear deep into a weak joint. "Hyah!"
But the monster swung wildly, clipping her and sending her skidding across the dirt. She recovered quickly, spear ready, but frustration boiled over as she glanced at the stag idly pawing the ground nearby.
"What is your problem, Clarence!?" Pearl yelled, voice cracking with exasperation amid the chaos. "This isn't playtime! Help us—do something!"
Clarence lifted his stag head slowly, dark eyes meeting hers for a brief, pointed moment. His ears flicked back in what could only be interpreted as sarcastic dismissal. No explanation. No shift back to speak. Not even a sympathetic bleat. He simply turned away, antlers held high, and trotted a few steps further into the treeline—still within sight, but utterly refusing to engage. As if to say, Oh, sure, because I'm the one who called hybrids disgusting.
The sting of her overheard words hung unspoken in the air, thick as the forest mist.
Rose glanced over, concern etching her features. "Clarence..."
But there was no time. The beast roared louder, charging Rose now. She raised her shield, absorbing the impact with a ground-shaking thud, then spun to bash it aside. Garnet leaped onto its back, gauntlets pounding relentlessly—crack, crack—fracturing more armor.
Pearl, fuming but focused, synchronized with Garnet. "Now! Aim for the gem!"
Together, they unleashed a barrage: Pearl's spear projectiles raining like blue energy lances, Garnet's fists hammering, Rose's shield providing unbreakable cover. The corrupted fusion thrashed wildly, tentacles flailing in desperate arcs, uprooting trees and sending debris flying. One claw nearly grazed Clarence's stag form—he didn't even flinch, just sidestepped with lazy grace, continuing to "graze" as if the battlefield were a peaceful meadow.
Finally, with a coordinated strike—Garnet's massive punch shattering the core plating, Pearl's spear piercing true, and Rose's shield slam pinning it—the beast let out a final, ear-splitting wail. Its form destabilized in a burst of corrupted light, poofing into smoke.
The gemstone clattered to the forest floor—a twisted, multi-faceted orange-brown stone, cracked and warped.
Pearl bubbled it with a swift gesture, sending it away, then stood panting, spear vanishing as she turned sharply toward the stag. "Clarence, we are talking about this when we get home. Your behavior today was reckless and—"
The stag merely snorted—a deep, sarcastic huff—before shimmering back into beaver form, resuming his dam-building as if nothing had happened.
Garnet adjusted her visor, sensing the unresolved tension. "He's upset."
Rose approached slowly, kneeling beside the beaver. "Sweetie... whatever it is, you can tell us."
But Clarence just slapped his tail once more, sending a playful splash toward the group—aimed squarely at Pearl's direction—and kept working. No words. No explanation. Just quiet, biting defiance.
The forest fell silent again, save for the trickle of the stream and the unspoken rift hanging heavier than any corrupted roar.