Chapter Text
Max wished she had chosen different clothes to kill herself in.
Her red and white University of Chicago sweatshirt had always been the annoying sort, with a collar that was too tight and itchy fabric. She had made the very wise decision of wearing jean shorts with it, and as it was well into October, the night air had a good chill to it.
She figured, though, if she went back and changed she would chicken out. And Max didn’t want to chicken out. She was ready. More than ready.
The last several years haven't been the best. Heck, her whole life hasn't been the best. She had always resolved to hiding her problems instead of dealing with them. That is, until said problems started to swallow her whole. And now here she was, sneaking into Millenium Park at 2 am on a Tuesday, to overdose on painkillers. She wasn’t the throw-yourself-off-a-bridge type, so she figured this would do. She just wanted it to end. She wanted it all to end.
Once, she had thought that maybe things would be different. Maybe she could actually have a good future, in spite of her broken home and abusive stepbrother. Maybe she could even have the kind of life that those main characters in chick flicks had, with 2 hot guys fighting over her, a perfect best friend, a loving family, and a bright future ahead of her. When she had been with Lucas and his friends, she had believed. She had stupidly believed. That is, until said abusive stepbrother— the one she had prayed would just go away— died in a car crash. It was all downhill from there. It wasn’t the root of all of her troubles, but it was the beginning of the end for her.
She missed Lucas. She hated to admit it, but she missed that stalker. She missed Dustin and Will too, and even Mike. She missed having friends to rely on, to do things with, to be able to talk to. She hoped Lucas was happy, wherever he was.
She sat down on a bench by a pond in Millennium Park. She had always loved this park; it was so peaceful in comparison to the bustling city. She wanted to be joined with that peace, that quiet, to let herself gently slip away under the soft moonlight.
She looked up for one last time, to admire the sky. The world truly was a beautiful place. If only it weren’t so tainted.
The stars are out tonight. She observed dreamily. She sighed, staring at the bottle in her hand. And as she reflected on her short, rather pathetic life—broken family, dead brother, no friends, barely passed high school, failing her business major—she thought perhaps the thing she would miss most would be Lucas. It was probably stupid and sad to miss your high school boyfriend most out of everyone in your life, but he had always been there, even when she pushed him away. She wished… Well, it is too late now. She regarded the bottle. And unscrewed the cap.
Mike groaned in utter agony at his Communications Quizlet for his upcoming test. He glanced at the online flashcard, seeing yet another word and definition he didn’t know. He groaned again. My test is tomorrow. And I don’t know at least half the definitions. I am screwed.
“Will you shut up?” Lucas asked, not at all politely. “You aren’t the only one trying to study here. You’re just the only one failing.”
Mike sat up in his chair and leveled a glare at his friend. “I’m not failing. I have a C. That’s average.”
“The only reason you still have that C is because in the beginning of the year you aced every test. Remind me of how many tests in a row you’ve failed?”
Mike mimicked his words in a mocking tone to which Lucas threw his notebook at him. He missed.
Mike snorted. “Wow, I can see how you got on the college basketball team.”
Lucas finally looked up. “Hey, I did that without looking! It was pretty good!”
Dustin burst into the room. “Guys! Guys! Suzie is going to be in town next weekend!”
Mike grinned at him. “Hey, that’s great!”
Lucas nodded. “Yeah, you must be excited. It’s been a while.”
Mike smirked. “Do we need to leave the apartment for the night or…?”
Dustin flipped him off. “You know me and Susie aren’t like that. We’re talking things slow.”
“Yeah, but after too long girls lose interest.” Lucas argued.
Dustin propped his head on his hands. “Oh, and please remind me, you and your last girlfriend were together for how long before she dumped you? Lucas bristled. “Shannon and I were together for a month! That isn’t that short a time!”
Mike got up and headed to the kitchen, leaving them to their argument.
He shared this apartment with Will, Lucas, and Dustin. They all went to colleges nearby, although while Mike and Will went to Loyola, Lucas and Dustin were accepted to Northwestern.
Dustin and Suzie had maintained their long-distance relationship even into college, which Mike thought was pretty impressive. Mike had never really had a serious relationship, unless you counted his sophomore girlfriend of a month Staci, which he didn’t. Will had never shown much interest in girls, but Mike hoped he would find someone good for him in college (though they were 2 years in and he still couldn’t care less about girls). Lucas was the only one of them who had had multiple girlfriends; obviously Max on and off for three years in high school, Sadie for six months, and a month ago, he and his short-lived girlfriend Shannon.
Except for Dustin, everyone in their small, shared apartment was single(though not for lack of trying on Lucas’s part). Mike wasn’t particularly interested in finding a partner; he was happy enough where he was. Well, maybe not happy. But ok. He was ok with where he was. Although sometimes…
He looked out the window at the bright lights, honking cars, and night life. Sometimes he wondered if she was here, if things would be different. It was stupid to miss your middle school girlfriend while in college, but…
He sighed, and watched the people rushing about below.