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The sizzling of meat on the grill, blended with the boisterous laughter of diners, created a familiar symphony on a weekend evening in Bangkok. Gemini skillfully flipped a slice of pork belly, which was gradually turning a beautiful golden brown, its rich, fatty aroma wafting directly into his nose. He picked up a perfectly cooked piece and placed it in the bowl of his girlfriend, Praew, who sat across from him, offering a slight smile.
"Here, eat up, it's hot."
"Thanks, Gem,"
Praew smiled back, her eyes twinkling with delight.
"This place is really good. Why didn't you ever bring me here before?"
Gemini simply shrugged,
"I just found out about it too. A friend recommended it."
In truth, he didn't even know why he had chosen this simple barbecue joint tucked away in a small alley instead of the fancy restaurants he and Praew usually frequented. Perhaps it was because he was feeling a bit suffocated.
Their relationship had started three months ago when Praew, a kind and pretty girl from his BasCii program, had mustered the courage to confess her feelings for him. At the time, Gemini had never considered dating. He found Praew to be a good and amiable person, and not wanting to hurt such a nice girl, he had agreed. He told himself he would give them both a chance.
But a "chance" seemed to be a luxury. He treated Praew with care and consideration, playing the role of a perfect boyfriend: picking her up, giving her gifts, and listening to her. Yet deep inside, he felt an invisible reluctance. The feeling was like wearing a beautiful shirt that didn't fit—no matter how much he tried, he couldn't feel comfortable.
He didn't have the thrilling jitters or the yearning, heart-wrenching pangs that books and movies always described. His feelings for Praew were simply fondness and a bit of responsibility.
"Hey, Gem, should we order another plate of pork belly?"
Praew's voice pulled him from his thoughts.
"Yeah, sure. I'll get it."
Gemini raised his hand, about to call a waiter who was running past. But just then, another person emerged from the cashier counter and headed toward their table. And in that moment, the noisy world around Gemini seemed to temporarily fall silent.
The person wasn't very tall, perhaps even slightly smaller than him, but exuded a strange charisma. His bleached ash-blond buzz cut stood out under the restaurant's yellow lights. He had a sharp, chiseled face with a straight, high nose, and especially a pair of sharp eyes with a hint of defiance.
He wore several shimmering silver earrings in his ears, and when he leaned over to clear a stack of empty plates from the table next to them. He wore a baggy black tank top with wide-leg plaid pants, old, worn-out high-top Converse, and a flannel shirt that was casually tied around his waist.
The overall outfit looked messy and rugged, yet it came together in a strangely harmonious way, creating a distinct street-style look.
"Would you two like to order anything else?"
The voice made Gemini jump. It was completely contrary to his edgy appearance - a sweet, clear, and incredibly pleasant voice. He looked up and met the other person's gaze. The guy was looking at him with the calm look a staff member gives a customer, but it was enough to make Gemini's heart skip a beat.
"Oh... yes, can we have another plate of pork belly and two bottles of water, please?"
Praew quickly answered when she saw Gemini staring blankly.
"Okay, coming right up."
The person nodded, offered a polite smile, and quickly turned away. Gemini instinctively followed his retreating figure until he disappeared behind the kitchen counter. He felt a flutter in his chest, a strange sensation he had never experienced before.
"Hey, what are you staring at?"
Praew lightly nudged his arm, her voice a little sulky.
"That guy looks scary. He's dressed like a thug."
"No... I thought he was... pretty cool,"
Gemini stammered, quickly turning his attention back to the grill. But the image of the ash-blond hair and that sweet voice kept swirling in his mind.
Gemini couldn't stop thinking about the guy from the barbecue restaurant. A sense of curiosity and an indescribable excitement urged him to go back. Day after day, he found excuses to visit the restaurant, sometimes alone, sometimes with friends.
And then he saw him again.
This time, Gemini sat in a more secluded corner, but it was enough to observe him without being too obvious. He still had the same style, still energetically running back and forth throughout the restaurant. Gemini's eyes were practically glued to him, completely unconsciously.
He watched him laugh and joke with other staff, patiently explain the menu to an elderly family, and wipe the beads of sweat from his forehead. Every small action of his captivated Gemini's attention in a strange way.
Fourth Nattawat was used to people staring at him. With his appearance, he always received two contrasting kinds of looks: one of judgment and disdain from conservative people, and the other of lust and craving from those who wanted to get him into bed, regardless of gender. He glanced toward the corner of the restaurant and recognized the kid from the other day. The boy was alone, staring at him without blinking.
Fourth had to admit, this kid was totally his type. Tall, handsome in a scholarly, innocent way. The way he stared at him so naively made Fourth want to laugh a little. But then he quickly dismissed the thought.
He could tell at a glance that the kid was an amateur. A boy who probably didn't even know what a deep kiss was like. Getting involved with this type was a hassle. They would easily mistake a one-night stand for real love, then cry and cling. Fourth didn't want to waste his time on those sappy dramas.
He shrugged, considering Gemini's gaze to be like all the other infatuated stares, and continued with his work.
That evening, before leaving, Gemini mustered all his courage to talk to him.
"P'..."
He hesitated,
"P', are you working here?"
Fourth, who had just untied the apron from his waist, turned around.
"Yeah, I'm just helping my uncle out. What's up?"
"Oh, nothing... I just wanted to ask... Can I have your Instagram? I think P' has a really cool style."
Gemini blurted out in one breath, his ears starting to feel hot.
Fourth raised an eyebrow slightly. The compliment and approach weren't bad. The kid looked naive but was also pretty bold. He smiled a knowing, meaningful smile that Gemini couldn't quite understand.
"Sure, Nong. Give me your phone."
And so they exchanged contacts.
The entire next afternoon, Gemini spent his time lying on his bed, bingeing on Fourth's social media. His Instagram had two distinct, contrasting sides.
By day, it was the image of a true Chulalongkorn Law student: thick stacks of law books, check-in photos at the school library, and posts complaining about exams. Gemini was completely surprised to learn that he was two years older than him and studying such a prestigious major.
But when night fell, Fourth's profile transformed into a completely different world. Blurry photos in bustling bars and clubs. He wore bolder outfits, surrounded by friends who were just as edgy.
There were photos of him with different people, both male and female, with intimate gestures. Gemini realized that this was the wild lifestyle people often talked about. A sense of unease crept into his chest, a feeling he couldn't name. Jealousy? No way, what was he to him?
He decided to message him.
"P'Fourth, it's Gemini."
The reply came almost immediately.
"I know, the kid from the barbecue joint."
Their conversation began like that.
Gemini found that Fourth was captivating and humorous to talk to. They talked about everything under the sun, from school and friends to their taste in music and movies. Gemini was an excellent listener. He could sit for hours just to listen to Fourth complain about a difficult professor or vent about a boring night out. Fourth initially saw Gemini as a fun way to pass the time, a good younger brother to confide in. He had never met anyone so patient with him.
But for Gemini, every message, every conversation with Fourth was a joy. He realized he was always smiling unconsciously when he looked at his phone screen. He started to anticipate messages from him and felt disappointed if he didn't reply all day. His feelings grew quietly, seeping into every corner of his heart without him even realizing it.
Video calls gradually replaced text messages. Gemini got to see Fourth's room for the first time; it was a bit messy but had a huge bookshelf. He also got to see his bare face, no longer sharp and defiant, but instead showing the tired and endearing features of someone who had just woken up.
Fourth would often call him late at night after returning from a night out. He would lie on his bed, puffing on his vape, and start complaining.
"Tonight was so dead, Gem. The music was awful, and the people were so boring."
"Then why did you go?"
Gemini would ask gently.
"Well, it's boring being alone at home. I just went for the atmosphere."
But Fourth gradually realized something strange. While he was always the one doing the complaining, Gemini seldom talked about his own problems. The kid was always calm and composed, listening and offering simple but profound advice.
Once, Fourth had trouble with a difficult essay and called Gemini, grumbling for an entire hour. Gemini wasn't bothered at all and patiently found resources and sent him useful links.
"This kid might be more mature than me."
Fourth thought to himself. The thought was both amusing and a little annoying.
That evening, Gemini was back at the barbecue joint, but not to eat. He sat at a small table near the entrance, his glass of water half-empty. He and Praew were in a cold war.
The reason was something trivial: Praew was angry because Gemini had refused to go shopping with her to spend time on a group project. It wouldn't have been a big deal if Praew hadn't said, "You never prioritize me, Gem."
That sentence made Gemini think a lot. He knew he was wrong. Even if he didn't love her, having agreed to be her boyfriend, he should have been more responsible. He had bought two late-night movie tickets for a romantic comedy that Praew loved and had asked her to meet him at this restaurant to make amends. He wanted to make up for his mistake.
But it was almost showtime, and Praew still hadn't arrived. She wasn't replying to his messages or answering his calls. Gemini sighed, a feeling of disappointment and a little weariness overwhelming him.
Fourth had noticed Gemini sitting alone since his shift began. The kid looked sad, constantly checking his phone and sighing. After the restaurant emptied out and was preparing to close, Fourth cleaned the last table, then conveniently walked toward Gemini.
"Nong, not leaving yet? You've been here all evening."
Gemini looked up and saw Fourth standing in front of him, still in his usual stylish clothes.
"I... I'm waiting for a friend."
"Girlfriend?"
Fourth asked, raising an eyebrow.
Gemini nodded slightly.
Fourth glanced at the two movie tickets on the table, then at the clock. The 10 p.m. showing. It was now 9:45. He sighed and pulled up a chair to sit across from Gemini.
"Stood up, huh?"
Fourth's voice wasn't mocking; it was simply a straightforward question. Gemini felt his eyes well up. He nodded again, his voice a little choked.
"We're in a fight. I wanted to make up... but she doesn't seem to want to."
Fourth was silent for a moment. He looked at the boy in front of him, who had the face of a sad, abandoned puppy. He didn't know why, but he felt a little annoyed. He hated seeing that look on his face. He glanced at the two movie tickets again, then made a decision that even he didn't expect.
"The tickets are about to expire,"
He said, his voice casual.
"How about... you go watch the movie with me? We can save these tickets from going to waste."
Fourth's offer hung in the air, light as a wisp of smoke but with a weight that stunned Gemini. He looked up sharply, his eyes wide, trying to figure out if it was a joke or for real. Fourth's face remained calm as usual, but in his eyes, Gemini saw something... that wasn't like before.
"Are... are you serious?"
Gemini stammered, his heart starting to beat with excitement.
"Of course, I am,"
Fourth shrugged, pointing to the tickets.
"It'd be a waste. I'm free anyway. Consider it your treat for being so patient and listening to all my complaints."
The reason Fourth gave sounded so logical that it successfully dispelled Gemini's initial awkwardness. But deep down, he knew he wasn't agreeing because he was saving two tickets. He agreed because it was a golden opportunity to be closer to him, an opportunity he hadn't even dared to dream of. The sadness of being stood up by Praew seemed to vanish, replaced by a nervous, sweet feeling that spread through his entire body.
"Okay... okay then,"
Gemini mumbled, quickly gathering his things.
"The theater is close by."
"I know. Let's go, we're almost late."
Fourth stood up, grabbed the shirt tied around his waist, put it on, and walked casually toward the front door.
They arrived at the theater just in time. The movie they watched, ironically, was a sappy romance, the exact genre Gemini had chosen to make up with Praew. When the lights in the theater dimmed and the first scenes began to play, Gemini's heart fluttered again. The distance between him and Fourth was very small, so close that he could feel the warmth radiating from him.
Contrary to Fourth's expectations, Gemini wasn't awkward at all. He was completely captivated by the tragic love story on screen. During the emotional scenes, when the female lead cried, Gemini also sniffled. He quickly tried to wipe away the tears that were welling up.
Fourth sat next to him, feeling sleepy. His taste was for thrilling action movies, breathtaking car chases, or tense mind games. This tear-jerking romance genre was even more boring to him than a constitutional law lecture.
He glanced over, and in the light from the screen, he saw the kid's shoulders slightly trembling. He was really crying. Fourth couldn't help but chuckle softly.
"What a kid,"
He thought to himself, but a soft, strange feeling welled up inside him.
The movie finally ended, to Fourth's relief and Gemini's regret. Since they were sitting in the row closest to the exit, they were the first to get up and leave when the credits began to roll. The lights in the theater still hadn't turned on, only the dim lights illuminating the steps.
"Be careful, it's dark."
Gemini warned when he saw Fourth walking a bit too fast.
"I know, I'm not a kid..."
Fourth's sentence was cut short by a gasp. He missed a step, stumbled, and fell forward. For a split second, he thought he was about to "kiss" the cold floor. But just then, a strong hand caught his wrist, pulling him back. The pull was so strong that Fourth fell backward, his back hitting the other's solid chest.
"I told you so,"
A warm, deep voice said right next to his ear, followed by a sigh of relief.
Fourth's heart pounded in his chest, not because he almost fell, but because of how close they were. His whole body was practically engulfed in Gemini's embrace. He was taller, his shoulders were wider, and his chest was surprisingly firm.
"Thank... thank you,"
Fourth mumbled, quickly standing upright.
But Gemini didn't let go of his hand. Instead, the hand holding his wrist slid down, and his long, warm fingers intertwined with his.
"Let me lead you so you don't fall,"
Gemini said, his voice casual, then gently pulled him, carefully walking down each step.
Fourth froze. He let the kid lead him through the dark rows of seats. Gemini's hand was big, completely enveloping his. The warmth from his palm was so real and safe in a way that was new to him.
Fourth's heart, which was used to the bold, passionate touches of others, suddenly fluttered because of this innocent hand-holding. He was used to being the one to take the lead, to be in control, but now, he was being protected by someone younger than him.
The feeling was... very strange. And also very nice.
They held hands like that until they left the theater and stepped into the bright lobby. Only then did Gemini seem to wake up, and he quickly let go of Fourth's hand, his ears burning red.
"I... I'm sorry..."
"It's okay,"
Fourth replied softly, unconsciously rubbing his fingers that still felt Gemini's warmth.
Just then, Gemini's phone vibrated. He took it out, and the embarrassed smile on his face suddenly vanished. Fourth saw his expression change and asked curiously,
"What is it?"
Gemini didn't say anything, just silently showed Fourth the phone screen. It was a message from Praew:
Let's break up, Gem. I realize now that your love isn't for me. You're a very good and caring person, but I don't need someone who doesn't have feelings for me. I wish you happiness.
The atmosphere between them grew heavy. Gemini put his phone in his pocket, his eyes looking down at the floor, his shoulders slumping. He felt sad, a heavy sadness. But it wasn't the sadness of a person whose heart was broken, but the sadness of a guilty person.
He had hurt a good girl. He had wasted her time and her feelings.
Fourth observed Gemini's expression. He was experienced enough to know the difference. The kid wasn't heartbroken from the breakup; he was tormenting himself with guilt. He sighed and patted Gemini's shoulder.
"Don't overthink it. This was bound to happen sooner or later. At least you didn't keep deceiving her."
He paused, and then an idea flashed in his mind.
"Hey, what about coming with me somewhere?"
"Where?"
Gemini looked up, his eyes still filled with sorrow.
"Somewhere that can help you forget everything,"
Fourth winked, a mischievous smile appearing on his face.
"To my world."
Fourth's world was a bar hidden in a bustling alley, where loud music blared, neon lights flickered in various colors, and the air was thick with the smell of alcohol and cigarette smoke. This was the first time Gemini had ever stepped into a place like this. Everything was new and a little overwhelming.
Fourth pulled him to a table in a corner and ordered two blue cocktails.
"Drink up, you'll feel better."
Gemini hesitated but then picked up the glass. He had a very low alcohol tolerance and could barely drink. But perhaps at this moment, he really needed a little buzz to forget the feeling of guilt weighing on his heart.
He took a big gulp, finishing half the glass. The initial sweetness of the fruit masked the strong taste of the alcohol, but right after, a burning sensation spread from his throat down to his stomach.
They sat there, amidst the thumping music, talking about random things. Fourth, as usual, was the one who talked more. But he noticed that after a few cocktails, Gemini had become bolder. He laughed more, and his eyes became hazy.
By midnight, while Fourth was still quite sober, Gemini was completely drunk. He slumped his head onto the table, mumbling nonsense.
Fourth sighed; it looked like the party had to end here. He paid the bill and hailed a taxi for Gemini.
This was really a terrible idea.
Gemini was much taller and heavier than him. It was a chore to help someone as drunk as him. Fourth struggled for a long time to get Gemini into the car, then again to get him from the taxi all the way to his bedroom in the dorm.
"Heavy as fuck."
Fourth grumbled, finally getting Gemini onto the bed. He was so tired he could barely breathe, and his back was soaked with sweat.
He was about to turn and get himself a glass of water when he heard a rustling sound behind him. Turning back, he saw Gemini sitting up, staggering as he took off his hoodie. He had a habit of sleeping without a shirt, and even when he was drunk, the habit remained.
Clank. The sound of a leather belt hitting the wooden floor echoed, breaking the suffocating silence in the room. His white dress shirt, with the top two buttons already undone, was yanked off his dress pants by Gemini's hand.
The remaining buttons were released one by one, revealing patches of healthy, honey-colored skin. Finally, the shirt was completely removed and thrown into a corner, fully exposing his perfect upper body.
Fourth stood still, his throat suddenly as dry as if he had just crossed a desert. He swallowed, but the action only seemed to intensify the thirst in his chest.
The warm orange glow of the bedside lamp wasn't strong enough to light up the whole room, but it was more than enough to turn the body in front of him into a sculpture by some Greek god. Light and shadow intertwined, dancing on his honey-colored skin, artistically emphasizing every line.
His broad, solid shoulders, stretching out on both sides, were the result of his swimming and basketball practices that Fourth had seen by chance. His firm chest rose and fell rhythmically with the deep and slightly labored breaths of a drunk person. And then, his eyes couldn't help but fixate on the perfect abdominal muscles, six solid packs faintly visible under the dim light.
They weren't overly flashy or stiffly flexed, but had a natural firmness, an undeniable testament to the active lifestyle of a twenty-year-old. Gemini was an athlete, and his body was a powerful statement of that fact.
Fourth's mind was a mess.
He had seen many beautiful bodies. A lot.
In noisy bars, in gyms thick with the smell of sweat, and even in his own bed during fleeting one-night stands. Models, fitness trainers, charming playboys... they all had bodies to admire.
But nobody, no single moment, had ever made him react so strongly, so viscerally, and so uncontrollably.
Maybe it was the alcohol, he told himself. That last cocktail must have been too strong. It had numbed his reason and amplified his deepest desires.
Or perhaps, he didn't need to blame the alcohol; it was the person in front of him.
The attraction that Gemini exuded wasn't the polished, flashy kind of a seasoned man. It was something raw, primal, and full of life. It was a mixture of an innocent student's charm and the explosive masculinity of a man in his prime.
All the reasoning, all the defenses he had carefully built up around himself over the years, all the rules about "not getting involved with people you know," "not messing with a straight guy," and especially "not having feelings for Gemini"... all of them came crashing down in that instant. They shattered like a mirror thrown onto a stone floor, impossible to fix.
He saw Gemini, after taking off his shirt, stagger a few more steps and then collapse onto the bed. The mattress sank under his weight. He lay on his back, his eyes closed, his long, curved lashes casting a shadow on his cheekbones. It seemed the drunkenness had completely defeated him.
Fourth couldn't stop himself anymore. His legs seemed to have a will of their own, slowly carrying him closer to the bed. Step by step, soundlessly. He sat down on the edge of the bed, the mattress sinking again, causing a slight movement that made Gemini stir but not wake up.
He held his breath. His eyes greedily scanned the chest that was rising and falling with each steady breath. His skin looked so smooth under the light; he wondered what it would feel like to touch.
Would it be hot, or cool? Soft, or firm under his fingers?
The curiosity turned into an irresistible urge. He slowly raised his hand, his own long, slender fingers trembling slightly. Just a little. Just touch him for a little while, and he would stop. He promised himself that. His index finger was about to land on the skin of his chest.
Suddenly, Gemini opened his eyes.
Fourth's heart plummeted to his stomach. A cold sensation ran down his spine. Busted. He was about to pull his hand back, about to get up and make up some excuse, but he couldn't.
Gemini's eyes were looking at him. They were hazy, unfocused, but they were looking straight at him, as if they could see right through the confident facade he always wore.
"P'Fourth..."
He called his name. His voice was no longer clear and bright as usual, but hoarse from the alcohol and sleepiness. But the way he said his name, prolonging the last syllable, it was like an invitation, a silent question.
Fourth's heart, which had stopped beating in surprise, now began to pound wildly in his chest. He'd been caught. But instead of feeling guilty and embarrassed, a bold and crazy thought, like a flame, ignited and took over his mind.
He had already come this far; what else did he have to lose? He leaned down, bringing his face close to Gemini's, so close he could feel the boy's strong, alcohol-scented breath on his cheek.
He flashed a smile that he knew was his most charming, his voice deliberately lowered, carrying a bewitching hint of alcohol.
"What is it, Nong? Do you want me?"
It was a rhetorical question, a provocation, a final test. He expected him to be flustered, to push him away, to stammer an explanation. But Gemini didn't answer with words. He used an action. A decisive and instinctive action. He raised his hand, his strong fingers gripping the back of Fourth's neck, and pulled him down forcefully.
And then, in the room lit only by the faint glow of the bedside lamp, two pairs of lips crashed into each other wildly, devouring each other as if they had been waiting for this moment for a very long time, for an eternity.
The pungent scent of alcohol, mixed with Fourth's faintly sweet, subtle perfume and Gemini's fresh, masculine body odor, created a lethal catalyst in the silent bedroom. Their kiss had no gentle or exploratory beginning. It wasn't a romantic prelude.
It was a violent collision, an explosion of pent-up emotions, of secret desires unleashed by the alcohol.
Gemini, though so drunk he couldn't walk, had incredible strength in his arms. He practically pinned Fourth to the bed, one hand still gripping the back of his neck, giving him no chance to retreat, while the other clenched his waist, pulling his body close to his own scorching, bare chest.
His kiss was clumsy and lacked technique, but it was also incredibly possessive. He lightly bit Fourth's lower lip, then used his tongue to part his lips, invading the warm mouth boldly. He devoured Fourth's lips like a starving man who had finally found water.
There was no guidance, no finesse, just pure instinct and a burning desire to claim and merge.
Fourth, a man who had always prided himself on his extensive experience in love felt completely submissive for the first time in his life. He was like a small boat caught in a vortex named Gemini.
His head was spinning.
The taste of the sweet cocktail still lingering on Gemini's tongue melted away all his remaining reason into nothingness. He responded just as wildly. His hands wrapped around his neck, his fingers running through his soft, dark hair, pulling him even closer as if to eliminate any distance between them.
He forgot who he was, forgot his identity, forgot that this was an innocent kid he had promised himself he would never mess with. In this moment, in his arms, burned by his kiss, he was just a man drowning in lust, a moth flying headfirst into a flame.
The deep and long kiss seemed to last forever. The air in their lungs was running out, forcing them to break apart. When both were gasping for breath, Gemini reluctantly pulled away from his lips.
But he didn't stop there.
His hot lips began a new journey. He moved down, kissing his chin, his Adam's apple that moved up and down so invitingly. He lightly nibbled on his collarbone, feeling him tremble slightly under his lips, leaving faint reddish marks on his pale skin.
"Mmm... Gem..."
Fourth moaned softly, the sound lost in his throat, a mix of pain and pleasure.
His faint voice was like a powerful stimulant, running down Gemini's spine. His hand, which was holding his waist, was no longer content; it began to move more boldly.
His long fingers slipped under Fourth's baggy tank top, gliding over his firm stomach. The skin was so smooth and hot. When his cool fingers touched the metal navel piercing, Fourth's whole body shivered, a jolt of pleasure running through him.
No one had ever touched him in a way that was both so rough and so gentle. His one-night stands were often quick and hurried, focused only on satisfying physical needs mechanically. But with Gemini, even in his drunken state, every touch carried a sense of reverence, a strange exploration, as if he were admiring a priceless treasure.
Fourth felt like he was losing control, completely losing control. It was a feeling that was both terrifying and insanely arousing.
He started to respond.
His hand slid from Gemini's shoulder down to his firm chest, his fingers lightly tracing each perfect muscle. He could feel Gemini's heart pounding wildly under his palm, strong and full of life, like a war drum urging them to move forward.
Alcohol and lust were pushing them both to the final limit. Their clothes became cumbersome and unnecessary. Gemini started to pull Fourth's shirt up, and Fourth complied, practically tearing it off his body and throwing it into a corner of the room. Now, both were bare-chested, their hot skin pressed against each other, with no barriers left.
"P'Fourth..."
Gemini whispered, his voice hoarse with desire, burying his face in the crook of his neck, greedily inhaling his scent. His hot breath on his ear made his earlobe burn red.
"You smell so good..."
His naive comment in his drunken state had an extremely powerful effect.
He lifted his head, searching for his lips again. But this time, as they were about to kiss, Gemini's hand moved lower, touching the waistband of the wide-leg plaid pants Fourth was wearing. His thumb began to fumble for the cold metal button.
That accidental touch was like a high-voltage current shooting directly into Fourth's brain. All thoughts vanished, leaving only a burning anticipation.
How can this kid get him so horny?
Seeing the looseness, the surrender in his eyes, Gemini let the primal fire of desire within him pour out. He wanted him, wanted to possess him, wanted to make him feel good.
For the first time in his life experiencing this intense sensation, Gemini's heart couldn't help but race, pounding as if it would burst from his chest. He fumbled with the button on Fourth's pants and then pulled the zipper down. In no time, where there had once been a dress shirt on the floor, there was now a tank top and two pairs of pants.
When Fourth was completely naked under the light, Gemini was stunned for a moment. He stared at him without blinking, from his messy hair and swollen lips to his pale skin with a few red kiss marks, down to his well-proportioned body and his most private area. He swallowed, his throat dry.
"P'... You're so beautiful..."
He exclaimed, his voice so genuinely naive.
"Too much talk, shut up and just do it."
Fourth turned his face away, feeling a little strange seeing eyes filled with such infatuated devotion. His ears involuntarily turned bright red. He wasn't used to being admired with such reverence.
Hearing Fourth's provocative command, Gemini felt as if the last chains of his reason had been broken. He was no longer the obedient, gentle student everyone knew. Now, he was a wild beast guided by his most primal instincts.
He leaned down, facing his lower body. He looked up at him again, his eyes holding a mix of hesitation and determination.
"This is my first time,"
He said softly, almost whispering.
"Can you help me, P'? "
The words brought a sense of guilt to Fourth, but more than that, an uncontainable excitement. He would be his first.
His fingers gently touched his most private area, a touch so respectful and careful that Fourth felt as if he were made of delicate porcelain. He had no technique, no experience, just the raw sincerity of a desire that had been suppressed for too long.
Each touch, each kiss on Fourth's body carried an intensity, as if he wanted to engrave every inch of his skin into his mind, into his soul.
And then, he leaned down.
Gemini's hot, moist tongue ran along his length, making Fourth jump, a moan escaping through his gritted teeth. For the first time, someone giving him oral sex made him so enthralled and consumed. It wasn't about skillful technique, but the passion and devotion in every lick and suck. Gemini's eyes looked up at him, a silent possessiveness, an assertion that "you're mine," and that gaze made Fourth's thighs tremble uncontrollably.
"Ugh- Hm, ah... Gem..."
Hearing his name uttered so intimately and pleadingly from Fourth's lips, Gemini felt his mind starting to go insane. He sucked harder, more greedily, wanting to bring this man to heaven, wanting to satisfy him, wanting to hear him moan his name even more.
Fourth, who was used to fleeting affairs and skilled lovers in bed, was completely conquered by this passionate clumsiness. For the first time, he wasn't the one leading or controlling the game.
He felt himself melting under the boy's hands and lips, a sweet surrender he had never known. He let Gemini explore, let him possess, and let him take him to new limits of pleasure.
The wet lapping sounds and Fourth's choked moans echoed through the room, which was filled with Gemini's scent. The temperature in the room seemed to gradually rise, becoming hot and stifling.
"Hah... fuck- right there... that's it..."
Fourth writhed on the bed, his hands clenching the sheets until his knuckles were white, trying to hold back the sounds about to escape his throat. But Gemini's raw, instinctive inexperience was a deadly stimulant.
He didn't know the most sensitive spots or have polished skills; he simply followed what his heart and lust told him. And it was that sincerity, that devotion, that completely tore down the wall of defense Fourth had spent years building.
The pleasure surged like a tsunami, more powerful and violent than anything he had ever experienced. It wasn't just physical satisfaction, but a feeling of being treasured, of being desired most purely.
He looked down at Gemini's head buried between his legs, watching how focused and reverent he was, and he knew he had lost. He had lost miserably. Lost at the hands of a drunk kid.
"Gem... enough... I’m- I'm about to..."
Fourth couldn't finish his sentence. His body was as tense as a string about to snap, and then a loud moan escaped as he completely released in his mouth.
Gemini looked up, his lips still bearing the traces of their passion. He looked at him with hazy, clear eyes, like a child who had just done a good deed and was waiting for a reward. His face was a little messy, but in Fourth's eyes at that moment, it was breathtakingly seductive.
Him - Fourth Nattawat, who had always considered himself a seasoned hunter in the dating world, had just been completely devoured by a drunk "fawn."
And the worst part was... he liked the feeling. He liked it to death.
And when he saw that hazy but satisfied look on his face, he knew he couldn't stop yet. The drunkenness had stripped away Gemini's last bit of hesitation, leaving only a raw, instinctual desire to possess the beautiful man lying beneath him more completely.
He crawled up, his bare body pressing against his, and placed another deep kiss on his swollen lips. This time, the kiss wasn't hurried; it was slow and wet, like a claim of ownership.
His hands roamed all over his body, exploring every curve and every hollow, as if wanting to memorize every detail. Fourth's skin was smooth and hot under his palms. Gemini could feel his entire body trembling slightly, not from fear, but from anticipation.
There was no preparation, no lubricant, just the natural wetness brought on by their desire. Gemini clumsily spread Fourth's legs, positioning himself between them. He leaned down and whispered in his ear, his voice hoarse with lust, a whisper only they could hear.
"Can I come in, P'Fourth?"
It wasn't exactly a question for permission, but a gentle declaration. Fourth didn't answer with words; he just gave a slight nod, his hands clenching the bedsheets, his body tense in preparation for what was to come.
The feeling as Gemini entered was both tight and searingly hot. Fourth let out a soft cry; the initial tension made him a little uncomfortable. But Gemini wasn't in a hurry. He paused, giving him time to adjust. He leaned down and kissed the beads of sweat on his forehead, kissing his closed eyes, the kisses a soothing comfort.
This unexpected gentleness, in such a passionate moment, completely broke Fourth down. He relaxed his body, wrapped his arms around Gemini's neck, pulled him into another kiss, and subtly moved his hips in a silent invitation.
"Keep going."
And then, Gemini began to move.
His thrusts were a bit hesitant and lacked rhythm at first, but very quickly, guided by instinct and Fourth's enthusiastic response, they became powerful and forceful. The quiet room now only contained the raw sound of skin hitting skin, Gemini's heavy breathing, and Fourth's sweet, uncontrollable moans.
For Gemini, this was a completely new experience, a world he had never known. The feeling of being wrapped in Fourth's warmth and softness, the feeling of completely merging with the man he had secretly desired for so long - it was more intense than anything he had ever imagined. He looked deep into Fourth's eyes, a pair of eyes that were once sharp and defiant, now glistening with tears, filled with the image of him and only him.
Fourth felt like a small boat in a storm. He was submerged in the waves of pleasure that Gemini was bringing. This kid, even though it was his first time, had incredible stamina and a primal passion that he couldn't resist.
Every one of Gemini's thrusts hit his deepest, most sensitive spot, making his mind go blank, knowing nothing but to call his name in choked sobs.
"Gem- Gemini... faster... faster please..."
His request was like a final command. Gemini let out a low growl from his throat and sped up while he leaned in and suck Fourth’s nipple hardly. The final movements became wild and frantic. He felt the speed below him become incredibly fast; his hips were lifted off the bed, his body jerking with the climax that was rising to its peak.
They both reached their climax at the same time in a combined cry. Gemini's body collapsed onto Fourth's, his chest heaving wildly, their sweat mixing, salty and hot.
It seemed like everything was over. Fourth was exhausted, without an ounce of strength left. But strangely, the hot rod inside him not only didn't soften but seemed to get even bigger.
Fourth opened his eyes in surprise. He was still hard. Even more so than at the beginning.
"You- You're... crazy."
He gasped, his voice almost gone.
"I'm sorry,"
Gemini mumbled, pouting like a child who had done something wrong, but his eyes said the complete opposite.
"It's just that P'Fourth is so beautiful..."
Even though he said he was sorry, Fourth could see the flame igniting once more behind his pitch-black pupils, which were deep with lust. Although his body was still tired, his body betrayed him - it started to react again, and his lower abdomen clenched with desire.
He’s hard again.
Before Fourth could recover, Gemini quickly flipped him over. A fast and decisive action that only gave him time to let out a gasp. He was forced to lie face down on the mattress, supporting his upper body on his weak elbows, his bare back completely exposed to Gemini's gaze, his hips pushed up in a provocative curve.
This position made Fourth feel strangely exposed and vulnerable. His bare back, which he rarely paid attention to, now became a living canvas under Gemini's hot gaze.
He could feel his gaze burning every inch of his skin, from his neck down to his invitingly curved hips. Shame and a wave of sinful pleasure ran down his spine.
Gemini placed his hands on the mattress on either side of Fourth's waist, leaning forward slightly, enveloping his back in his shadow. He swallowed. The sight in front of him was too arousing. His smooth, white back was dotted with sweat, his slender but firm shoulders were trembling slightly, and his perfect, slender waist was curving in a perfect line. It awakened the most primal beast inside him.
"P'Fourth..."
He called, his voice hoarse with want.
Without waiting for a reply, Gemini leaned down, placed a kiss on the back of his neck, and then used his tongue to trace each vertebra down. Every place his lips passed, Fourth would shiver. Gemini's large hands gripped his hips tightly, holding him in place, not allowing him to escape.
And then, he entered again from behind.
"Ah!"
Fourth let out a muffled cry, his face buried in the pillow to stop the scream from escaping. This second time, the sensation was even more intense. There was no initial tension, only a feeling of being completely filled, a scorching heat that went all the way in. His body felt like it was made to perfectly fit his.
Gemini began to move, slowly but possessively. He no longer had the clumsiness of the first time. The drunkenness seemed to have turned into a stimulant, helping him unleash all his instincts. Each of his thrusts was powerful and decisive, aimed directly at his deepest spot, making Fourth's entire body tremble.
Fourth's reason had completely vanished. He was no longer Fourth Nattawat, the skilled man who always took control. Now, he was just a body drowning in pleasure, completely controlled by the rhythm of the person behind him. The uncontrollable moans escaped from his lips, muffled by the pillow into sobs, calling his name subconsciously.
"Gem- ah... deeper, hng... Gemini..."
Hearing his name called so pleadingly amidst the broken moans, Gemini felt a rush of satisfaction and desire. He leaned closer, burying his face in Fourth's soft hair, his frantic breaths hitting his ear.
"I'm here... I'm right here..."
He whispered, and then he sped up. The rhythm became wild and frantic. The entire bed began to shake with their movements. Fourth couldn't see anything anymore; his mind was blank, and only a pure white of ultimate pleasure remained. He could feel his body clenching around him, clinging, begging for more.
The climax hit like a fierce wave, washing everything away. He screamed his name one last time, his body convulsing violently before going completely limp, collapsing onto the mattress. Almost immediately, he felt a warm liquid gush deep inside him, and Gemini's satisfied growl echoed in his ear.
The second storm of passion finally passed, leaving an almost absolute silence in the room. The air was thick with their combined scent—it was irrefutable proof of what had just happened.
Gemini collapsed onto his back, his chest heaving wildly; each of his breaths was like a small earthquake on Fourth's bare back. His weight, his warmth—everything was terrifyingly real. Fourth was completely exhausted, his body as limp as if he had just survived a life-or-death battle, but his mind was strangely clear.
He could feel that Gemini hadn't pulled out. He just stayed there, as if he wanted to leave his mark, to make sure that he was still here, not some wild dream caused by alcohol. He gently kissed his shoulder, a soft, almost apologetic kiss, before he slumped his head down, falling into the sleep of an exhausted drunk.
Fourth didn't know when he had fallen asleep. He only knew that when the first rays of morning sunlight peeked through the window and hit his eyelids, the first thing he felt wasn't the light, but a dull ache from his back and the weight of an arm wrapped around his waist.
He stirred slightly, and the pain reminded him of the madness of last night in a cruelly clear way. Everything wasn't a dream caused by alcohol. It had really happened.
He turned his head and looked at Gemini's sleeping face. The boy was lying on his side, his face buried in his back, his breaths even and warm on his skin. His long, curved lashes were still, his lips were slightly parted, and his face was completely relaxed, no longer showing the sadness of the Praew situation or the instinctive possessiveness of last night. Now, he was simply a sleeping first-year student, an innocent and unguarded beauty.
A complicated feeling welled up inside Fourth. There was the satisfaction of lust, the bone-deep weariness, but intertwined with it was something softer, more dangerous.
He had broken all his own rules. He had slept with a kid, someone he knew, and worst of all, a straight guy (or at least he had once thought so).
And he didn't regret it.
That was the most terrifying part.
Fourth carefully and slowly peeled Gemini's heavy arm off himself. The boy stirred slightly, mumbled something unclear in his sleep, and then fell silent again. He held his breath, waited a few seconds, and then gently slid out of the bed.
His whole body ached. He staggered into the bathroom, stood under the shower, and let the warm water wash over his body, full of faint kiss marks. He closed his eyes, and the images of last night flooded back like a slow-motion movie.
Gemini's hazy but possessive eyes, his clumsy but burning kisses, his powerful and instinctive thrusts... and that sincere, naive whisper, "P' is so beautiful..."
Fourth let out a bitter laugh. He had heard countless sweet compliments and slick lines. But not a single word had ever had such a powerful effect as the simple, honest statement from a drunk man.
When he walked out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist, Gemini was awake.
He was sitting on the bed, holding his head in his hands, his hair a mess. He had put on his pants again, but his upper body was still bare, revealing the perfect body that had made him lose all reason last night. He sat there motionless, staring blankly into the empty space in front of him.
Hearing the bathroom door, he jumped and looked back. And when their eyes met, Fourth saw the panic and confusion clearly in his eyes.
All the memories were coming back.
"P'Fourth..."
Gemini called, his voice hoarse and broken. He looked down at his hands, then back at him, his eyes filled with guilt.
"I... last night... I..."
He couldn't finish his sentence. His face went pale, then turned bright red with embarrassment. He quickly pulled the blanket up to cover his bare chest, a pointless action that showed his extreme distress.
Fourth sighed, trying to seem as calm as possible. He walked to the wardrobe, took out a t-shirt and a pair of shorts, and casually put them on. He needed to take control of the situation.
"You're up?" he asked, his voice so calm he was surprised himself. "Does your head hurt? I have some hangover medicine."
His calmness seemed to make Gemini even more panicked.
"No... that's not it..."
He stammered.
"I... I- with you... I'm sorry! I'm really sorry! I was so drunk last night, I don't know what I did... I..."
Fourth turned back and looked him straight in the eye.
"You don't know, or you don't remember?"
The question hit Gemini right where it hurt.
He fell silent.
He remembered.
Even though the memories were fragmented like shattered pieces, the feelings were still there. The feeling of Fourth's soft skin under his hands, the sweet taste on his lips, the feeling of completely merging with him... those feelings were so real they burned into his mind.
Seeing Gemini's expression, Fourth knew the answer. He walked closer to the bed, sat on the edge, keeping a safe distance.
"Listen, Gem,"
He said, his voice more serious.
"What's done is done. We're both adults. We both had a lot to drink last night. Just think of it as a mistake, an accident. You don't have to apologize."
An accident.
The word was like a knife in Gemini's chest. He didn't know why it hurt so much. It was clearly the best solution. An accident, and everything would go back to normal. But his heart wouldn't accept it.
The air in the room became heavy.
Gemini quickly stood up, frantically looking for his hoodie and shirt on the floor. He put them on in a hurry, as if the clothes could hide his shame and the raw emotions in his heart.
"I... I have to go. I have a morning class."
He lied. It was Sunday.
"Okay,"
Fourth just replied with one word.
Gemini practically ran out of the room. But just as his hand touched the doorknob, he stopped. He didn't turn back, just spoke over his shoulder.
"P'Fourth... can we... can we just forget about last night?"
Fourth looked at his stiff back, and a sense of indescribable loss welled up. He was used to one-night stands. The next morning, they would go their separate ways, no one owing anyone anything. That was his rule.
But why did he feel so uncomfortable when Gemini said that?
"Okay,"
He replied, his voice dry.
"If that's what we want."
The door opened, then slammed shut. Gemini was gone.
Fourth sat alone in the quiet room, where their combined scent still lingered in the air. He fell back onto the bed, staring at the empty ceiling.
Forget about it?
He closed his eyes. But the images, sounds, and feelings of last night appeared in vivid detail. He could forget a night of passion, but how could he forget how his heart had pounded just from an innocent hand-hold in a movie theater?
Fourth brought his hand to his lips, where he could still feel the burning sensation from Gemini's kisses.
He laughed, a self-deprecating laugh.
"Fourth Nattawat,"
He whispered to himself.
"You're screwed."
A week passed by as heavily as a century.
The so-called "forgetting" was a complete lie, a useless sedative they both used to deceive themselves. In reality, every detail of that night was etched deeper into their minds, like a movie played over and over with higher and higher resolution.
They started a ridiculous game of avoidance, a clumsy, silent play on the university campus. Once, Fourth was walking with his friends, chatting and laughing, when he suddenly stopped. He saw a familiar tall figure walking out from the basketball court at the end of the hallway.
His heart skipped a beat. Without thinking, he pulled his best friend's arm.
"Hey, let's go this way. I just remembered I have to stop by the club room."
The lie came out smoothly, but inside, a storm was brewing.
Gemini was even more miserable. He was sitting in the library, trying to focus on a thick textbook, when a familiar hazelnut-brown hair caught his eye at the opposite table. Fourth was sitting there, wearing glasses, looking scholarly and distant.
He didn't see him. But his mere presence was enough to make Gemini's heart pound. He quickly gathered his books, kept his head down, and practically ran out of the library, leaving the librarian's confused look behind.
They avoided each other like the plague, but ironically, the very act of running away made the other's image fill their minds completely.
For Fourth, the emptiness became palpable. He went back to his regular bar, where he used to be the king of parties.
He sat there, a blue cocktail in his hand, just like the one he had ordered for Gemini. But it tasted so bland today. Around him were hot bodies and flirtatious invitations. A beautiful young model walked up to him and whispered something in his ear.
Before, he would have smiled and replied. But now, he just politely shook his head. The other person's expensive perfume bothered him; it wasn't the fresh shower gel scent of Gemini. He realized that his loud, bustling world, where he once thrived, had suddenly become soulless and terrifyingly lonely.
For Gemini, it was a fierce internal struggle, a storm in his heart. He had followed his reason: run away and ask to forget. But his heart was screaming in protest. The initial shame and guilt were gradually replaced by a deep sense of loss and longing.
He couldn't focus on playing basketball; his usually accurate shots now all missed the hoop. He sat alone on the bleachers after practice, soaked in sweat, and then he remembered.
He remembered the feeling of Fourth's soft hair running through his fingers, the sweet scent on his neck, the way he would lift his head proudly, but his eyes would be glistening with tears. And he remembered so vividly the choked moans, calling his name amidst the wild waves of passion. That sound haunted him even in his dreams.
He realized now. His heart had long belonged to one person. That night, alcohol wasn't the cause; it was just the catalyst for the truth buried in his heart to erupt.
He had been a coward. He had hurt that proud man with his very request to "just forget about it."
And Gemini knew he couldn't keep running. He had to face him. No matter what the outcome.
That evening, Fourth was sitting on his bed with his knees pulled up, absently scrolling on his phone, when there was a knock on the door. He lazily went to open it, thinking it was a friend from the same floor coming to ask for instant noodles.
But the person at the door was Gemini.
The moment the door opened, time seemed to stand still. He stood there, wearing a simple white t-shirt and jeans, his hair still slightly damp as if he had just showered. Under the hallway light, his face looked pale, but his eyes were unusually bright.
It was no longer the panicked look from that morning, but one of determination mixed with anxiety, the look of a person who was ready for a fight.
Fourth's heart dropped to his stomach and then bounced back up to his throat. All the sarcastic remarks he had prepared in his head suddenly disappeared. He just wanted to slam the door shut and hide in his safe shell.
"P'Fourth,"
Gemini said, his voice slightly trembling but clear.
"Can we talk for a bit?"
Fourth was silent for a few seconds, trying to regulate his breathing. Finally, he moved to the side, a gesture of silent surrender. He closed the door, the dry sound echoing in the quiet space. This room, which still smelled of both of them, suddenly felt as suffocating as a cage.
"What is it?"
Fourth asked, crossing his arms over his chest and leaning against the door, the last shield he could put up.
Gemini didn't sit down. He stood in the middle of the room, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. He took a deep breath, gathering all his courage.
"I'm sorry,"
He said, looking him straight in the eye, not avoiding his gaze.
"I'm sorry for running away, and I'm sorry for saying those stupid words that morning. It wasn't fair to you."
Fourth raised an eyebrow, a mocking smile on his lips. It was his defense mechanism.
"What stupid words? 'Just forget about it'? I thought it was a good idea. Easy for both of us."
"No!"
Gemini almost yelled, the sound bouncing off the four walls. He realized he had said too much and quickly lowered his voice, but the intensity in his eyes didn't diminish.
"That's not a good idea. Because... because I can't forget. I've tried, P'Fourth. I've tried all week, but I can't. I can't forget for a single second."
Every word from Gemini was like a sledgehammer, breaking down Fourth's wall of defense. He stood up straight, no longer leaning against the door.
Gemini took a step closer, shortening the distance between them.
"I've thought a lot. About everything. About why I always want to be near you, about why I can't stand seeing you with other people, and about that night... I don't regret it, P'Fourth. I don't regret what happened."
He paused, his voice trembling.
"I only regret being too cowardly to face it."
His eyes were glistening with tears, filled with raw sincerity.
"My eyes were looking for you everywhere... The basketball court, the library, the hallways... When I couldn't find you, everything felt meaningless. I know I'm very foolish, and maybe I still don't understand everything.”
Fourth felt his heart melt. The warm water he had been craving finally soothed his dry soul. He had been waiting. He didn't know what he was waiting for, but it turned out to be these words.
“But there's one thing I'm sure of. I- I... I like you. I like being with you, something more than that."
Fourth walked toward him, completely closing the distance between them. He raised his hand, his long, slender fingers trembling slightly, and gently touched Gemini's cheek, wiping away the tear that was about to fall from the corner of his eye.
"So,"
Fourth smiled softly, a genuine, warm smile with no trace of self-mockery.
"It wasn't because you were drunk?"
Gemini shook his head, pressing his cheek into his palm, feeling the familiar warmth.
"The alcohol just gave me the courage to do what a sober Gemini has always wanted to do."
Hearing this, Fourth couldn't hold back anymore. He used his other hand to cup the back of his neck, pulled him closer, and placed a kiss on his lips.
It started with a soft, exploratory touch, gentle and reverent, like a silent question. And when Gemini responded by parting his lips, Fourth felt his trembling and his own relief.
The kiss deepened, no longer wild and devouring like when they were drunk, but a merging of two souls who had found each other after being lost for days. There was no wild possession, only offering and receiving, the sweetness of understanding, of forgiveness, and of a promise for the future.
They kissed for a long, long time, as if to make up for a week of separation and torment.
When they broke apart, both were breathing heavily. Fourth pressed his forehead against Gemini's, their noses touching, sharing a single breath. He looked deep into his dark eyes, now filled with his reflection.
"So from now on,"
He whispered, his voice teasing but full of affection.
"I'm officially tied down by a kid, huh?"
Gemini laughed, a radiant smile like sunshine after the rain, dispelling all gloom. He wrapped his arms tightly around Fourth's waist, pulling him close to his chest, feeling the synchronized beat of their two hearts.
"No,"
He replied, his voice full of confidence and happiness.
"I'm willingly tying myself down to your world."
Fourth's world used to be noisy bars and fleeting, endless parties. But now, his world had shrunk, fitting perfectly in the arms of the boy in front of him. A world that was warm, real, and strangely safe.
And this time, Fourth knew for sure that he had truly found his way home.
End.