Chapter Text
Chapter 1
Kirk’s eyes blinked rapidly, bringing the darkened room of his quarters into focus. A powerful, disorientating feeling had roused him from his sleep. He found himself jerking his head as if to physically shake it off before his sense of conscious movement had even caught up to him. Had he had a nightmare? He couldn’t tell. Sitting up, scrunching his eyes, he brought his hand to his brow and massaged it with his fingers trying to remember any details of a dream. There were none.
He sighed and retired his intrigue, chalking it up to some random R.E.M cross-wiring causing him to wake in an abnormal fashion. Laying his head back down on the pillow, he turned to his side where his gaze fell upon Spock lying next to him, fast asleep.
He must’ve joined him in the bed not long after Kirk dozed off as he could recall Spock entering the room as he made to settle down for the night. Spock lay on Kirk’s right with his body turned towards him. Seeing him like this Kirk couldn’t help but smile affectionately. He’d never given much if any thought to how Vulcans positioned themselves for sleeping until their relationship had reached a level of semi-cohabitation. Living on a federation Starship this actually felt like less of a relationship milestone, after all Spock’s quarters were located on the same deck as his. But indeed, when they did first discuss sharing quarters on a more permanent basis Spock had expressed his concern that their differentiating cultural habits may cause friction. Would it disturb the captain if Spock wished to meditate, could they find a common temperature setting to accommodate their different biological make up, would Kirk’s tendency to move in his sleep drive Spock “crazy”? All valid concerns of course but Kirk reassured him they could adapt. Now Spock typically alternated between quarters for meditation and neither of them ever ran too hot or too cold. As for sleeping it was actually Spock who had made the adjustment. Kirk quickly learned that Vulcans, somewhat unsurprisingly, assumed a sleeping position that would make a boarding school matron proud; on the back, straight-lined, mouth closed, no noise and fingers clasped above the sheets resting on their upper abdomen with no movement save the rising and falling of their chest. Ironically for a resting position Kirk did find it somewhat cold and unapproachable but he needn’t have worried. After a few days Spock began experimenting; laying on his side, his stomach, caressing the pillow against his cheek, turning towards his captain, and reaching out to wrap his arm around him, holding him close. His T’hy’la, his love. When it came to sharing a bed with James Kirk, it appeared Spock preferred to embrace his human side.
Any desire to return to sleep evaded Kirk as his gaze continued to linger on Spock, his thoughts drifting as they had done often of late to their newly formed bond. Something Spock had surmised could happen over time if they continued their tactile relationship and engaged frequently enough in mind melds. Kirk was now able to feel Spock’s presence without needing to formally join his consciousness through the practice. Being able to sense his partner’s moods, thoughts, and indeed ever-present underlying emotions from almost anywhere on the ship, was disconcerting to Jim at first. Not that Jim didn’t enjoy it in private, but he became concerned it would affect his ability to command. However, after a few weeks of practise he was glad to find he could confidently tune it out when he needed to.
Kirk felt his relationship with Spock had allowed him to run the gamut of purposes the Vulcan mind meld could serve. They had used it to obtain information, block out intrusive thoughts placed against their will by other world beings. But also to bring balance and order to Kirk’s thoughts in times of distress, grief and pain, to heighten intimacy during sex or even at times simply just…"because".
Over time Kirk had grown to love that familiar feeling of the twinned warmth he felt instantly whenever Spock initiated their shared consciousness. Not only did it feel good, it felt correct and though their bond had only been truly formed for a few weeks, he could no longer imagine their relationship without it.
Laying aside him now, without realising Kirk found himself bringing his own hand to Spock’s face, gently arranging his fingers to locate…what exactly? Spock’s psi points? He certainly possessed them but to what purpose could they possibly serve at this time? Kirk was human, incapable of initiating touch telepathy. And yet here he was enacting the very action that permitted such a connection. Asserting his touch he stilled for a moment, staring lovingly upon Spock’s face and began to utter the words;
‘My mind…to your mind. My thoughts…to your thoughts.’
His voiced thrummed in a deep timbre, consumed by want. The words felt so good to say. He could feel them resonate from his chest, the weight of them in his mouth, the passion for them on his lips. An aching pain could be felt in his core at the longing, the want for it to be real, to be the one to possess the ability to reach out and caress his lover’s soul, welcoming him into his own.
‘Spock.’ He whispered.
The commanding officer began to stir, his eyes emerging from slumber. Kirk in haste moved his affixed hand position so that instead he was simply cupping Spock’s cheek. Now didn’t seem the time to explain his actions, not when he couldn’t quite understand them himself.
‘Jim?’ Spock stared quizzically upon noticing his captain was conscious and staring directly back. ‘Is something the matter?’
‘I reckon I must’ve had a nightmare of some sort.’ Kirk explained. ‘I’m not sure quite what it was, damn thing woke me with quite a jolt but I’m alright.’
‘You are no longer troubled?’
‘No.’ said Kirk with his typical cocky bravado. ‘Not with my level-headed science officer at my side.’ He began to stroke Spock’s arm. ‘I would’ve gone back to sleep if you didn’t look so…’ he trailed off, his eyes darkening. ‘…fascinating.’
‘Jim?’
Kirk leaned in and placed a kiss to Spock’s soft, inviting lips. It was gentle but by no means chaste. He kissed him again, this time opening his mouth, capturing each lip in turn to gently suck, then bite. Spock reciprocated, allowing Jim greater entrance to deepen the kiss. Shuffling closer, Kirk put his arm around Spock’s waist and pulled him in tight, moving his hand up his back to grab a fistful of the fabric of Spock’s nightshirt while continuing to kiss him. There was a sense of growing urgency in his actions and while Spock was not resisting his advances, through their newly formed bond Kirk could caught a feeling of apprehension. He forced himself to break the kiss.
‘Is this okay?’ he asked.
‘Your behaviour is somewhat unusual given the lateness of the hour and the fact we were both previously asleep.’ Spock clarified.
‘Do you wish me to stop?’
‘No T’hy’la. I do not wish for you to stop.’
Kirk loved it when Spock addressed him by this Vulcan term, the tone in his delivery of the word always uniquely Vulcan, matter of fact yet simultaneously full of wanton desire. He resumed kissing Spock immediately, this time moving the kisses to his neck.
Spock’s lips began to utter gentle, soft moans at Jim’s administrations spurring him on to bite and nip at the exposed skin, leaving his mark. Bringing their lips together once more, he grasped the beautiful half-Vulcan tightly before tracing his hand down his back, across his hip and inside his pants. Wrapping his hand around the hardened member, Kirk began to stroke in time with his kisses causing Spock to gasp and tilt his head back.
‘That feel good?’
‘Incredibly so.’ Spock whispered, lacing his long delicate fingers through the captain’s hair. ‘T’hy’la please, move on top.’
Never one to disobey orders Kirk leaned in to kiss the Vulcan’s wrist before decidedly and sexily pushing him onto his back. Already merely in his underwear Kirk quickly rid himself of his boxer shorts before assisting Spock in turn to dispose of his clothing. Once fully naked Kirk straddled Spock’s hips, a groan formed in his throat as their erections made contact with each other. Sensing an opportunity to test their new bond Kirk gently trailed his fingers up and down Spock’s length in a teasing and tantalizing fashion that sent jolts of electricity up Spock’s spine. He locked eyes with his lover and projected his want.
‘Are you certain Ashayam?’ Kirk felt another wave of desire upon hearing this other Vulcan term of affection.
‘Yes Spock, I love to ride you.’
‘Then proceed.’
Shifting his weight, Kirk took hold of the half-Vulcan’s long, beautiful member. Lifting himself up just enough to drag the tip along his own length, his taint before positioning it at his entrance and coating it with Spock’s sweet slick. Lowering himself down his eyes drifted shut and his breath hitched as he felt the head pass the first tight ring of muscle followed by the first then second ridge. He relished in the fact that this part of Vulcan anatomy could stimulate him internally in a way no human ever could. The thought thrilled him so much that he inadvertently clamped down and prematurely began milking the organ before it was even fully inserted. A gasp escaping Spock’s mouth in response brought him back to reality long enough to continue sliding himself down until Spock’s member was fully submerged in his heat.
He stilled for a moment, enjoying the feeling of fullness before gently rocking forward. They moaned in unison. It felt so good. Kirk rocked again and again establishing the pace slow and steady at first. The pleasure of having a creature as beautiful as Spock inside you was not something to be rushed. They continued like this for several moments.
Kirk leaned forward, capturing Spock’s lips in a passionate consuming kiss. Spock, taking advantage of the position gripped Jim by the shoulders to deliver a sudden deep hard thrust. The pained gasp it released from Jim’s mouth proved his method had been effective. He did it again and again establishing a new rhythm.
Placing a hand on Spock’s chest to steady himself, Kirk raised himself back up just enough for the angle to hit the sweet spot inside him although the intensity was making it hard for him to maintain balance. No matter, he thought. They would both be coming soon.
Meeting Spock’s thrusts as best he could as they began to chase their orgasms, Kirk suddenly became aware of a dull aching in the back of his head. The ache began to grow, spreading form the base of his skull. He felt a throbbing rise in his temples that caused him to scrunch up his eyes in response. The pain remained constant for a few seconds but did not ease. Suddenly a loud ringing pierced his ears as the pain shot across his forehead with a far more terrifying intensity.
Letting out a cry he grasped the side of his face with his hand. The sound of the ringing increased. He screamed again.
‘Jim!’ He heard Spock shout, but he could not answer him. ‘Jim! What’s wrong?’
The pain was unlike anything Kirk had ever experienced yet it continued to increase. His breathing becoming uneven as he continued to scream in agony, both hands now clutching at his face in desperation. What was happening to him? As a final strong shooting bolt of pained ripped through his body he collapsed onto Spock’s chest.
The pain began to subside. Thank god, Kirk thought. The ringing in his ears still remained, drowning out all other sounds in the room as the throbbing in his head began to slow, the pain muting slightly with each passing pulsation. After a moment he dared to raise his head.
Feeling disorientated he tried to steady himself to get a sense of placement in the room. He looked down. His hand on Spock’s chest. Following his eyes upwards they came to rest upon Spock’s face. Spock’s eyes were wide, his expression that of fear.
Good. A thought spoke in Kirk’s head. Good?
He gazed upon the face of the half-breed below him. A feeling rose within his chest. A feeling of…disgust.
‘You.’ His voice was low, growling and seared with hatred.
‘Captain?’
Raising his hand above his own head, Kirk brought it back down with full force, striking the commanding officer across the face.
Before Spock had the chance to raise his mental shields Kirk struck him again, the sound of the slap reverberating around the room. Another strike followed, then a punch, then another. Suddenly Spock felt a hand wrap around his throat and squeeze hard.
He looked up to find a look of anger on his Captain’s face he’d never seen before, teeth clenched, spit flying, eyes almost lustful with rage. He struggled to free himself, a feeble gesture under the strength above him but in doing so it had forced Kirk to adjust himself. Spock caught a change of emotion flicker in the Captain’s eyes just before he glanced down between them and realising, as if for the first time, that their bodies were still joined.
Kirk’s face shot up, his eyes locking back to Spock’s. His expression of anger now joined with a sense of panic.
‘What is this? What are you doing to me?’ he demanded. The hand still on his throat, Spock was unable to respond.
Leaning forward, forcing more pressure on the hand grasped around his first officer’s neck, Kirk kept his eyes locked on Spock as he moved his free hand round his back, grabbed the base of Spock’s member and forcibly pulled himself off.
The sensation of being ripped from his Captain’s body caused pain for both of them although Spock was the only one to wince. The sucking sound of sloppy slick creating an unsettling noise in the room, Spock looked up to see Kirk examine his own fingers, coated in the viscous substance.
‘You foul, filthy, half-breed!’ Kirk yelled in disgust. ‘I’ll kill you!’
He tightened the grip around the commander’s throat with a strength Spock felt would crush his larynx. In the momentary pause before Kirk’s outburst he had frantically managed to raise his mental shields, engage logic. With marksmen like precision he gripped the base of Kirk’s neck sloping to his shoulder and pinched it with all his might.
The hand on his throat loosened. He looked up. The face of his Captain momentarily contorted in pain before the muscles visibly relaxed, the eyes closing.
His body collapsed onto Spock’s, successfully rendered unconscious.
An ache spread through Spock’s lungs as he gasped a breath of relief.