Archive of Our Own

Lagavulin

The air was dark and still. 

It was cold outside. The October chill was settling in, especially since the sun had gone down hours ago. Upon arriving back at the house, Chris had traded in his button down shirt for a hoodie - one that had probably been left behind by his father at some point judging by the fact that it was just ever so slightly too large for him. 

He’d always had the same problem with Wyatt. The hand-me-downs he would inevitably be forced to wear were always just slightly too large on him. It was a constant reminder that between the two of them Wyatt was the one that favored their father. And, subsequently, the one that their father happened to favor. 

Chris was taller than his father. It was a development that he’d only discovered after traveling to the past. The last time he’d seen the Leo of his time, that hadn’t been the case. But now he had a good inch on the man. At first it had given him a petty kind of thrill. But the truth remained that in the grand scheme of things Leo and Wyatt had always been broader . They’d always been able to put on muscle mass that Chris could never quite keep a hold of. Yes, he was tall. But he was skinny too. 

Where Wyatt was broad and imposing, Chris was lanky and scrappy. Where Wyatt was chiseled and rugged, Chris was soft and pretty . He hated being pretty. At least when he was younger in any case. His Grandfather said it was the Bennett in him,  and maybe that was true. After all, it definitely wasn’t the Wyatt in him. It was a bit on the nose, but Wyatt was the one that managed to get all the Wyatt traits it seemed. 

Chris, apparently, had gotten none of them. 

He’d changed a lot of things about the future dynamic between him and his brother in the past few hours, but that probably wasn’t one of them. Not unless killing a bunch of reality television loving demons could somehow alter a person's genetics… 

It was doubtful. 

And in the end it was fine. This new version of himself would still probably struggle through the awkwardness of it all during his teenage years, but he’d grow into himself the same way Chris had. He just hoped that baby him came to embrace the fact that he was all Halliwell in a different way than he had. He hoped that this time around, he would develop some self-confidence through a genuine appreciation of himself rather than through the fact that he didn’t have to see the face of a father he couldn’t stand every time he looked in the mirror in the morning. 

“There you are.” 

Chris jumped slightly at the sound of said father’s voice as it came seemingly out of nowhere. His head snapped in his direction and he watched as he made his way into the backyard, closing the door to the conservatory behind him. He hadn’t been expecting Leo to find him out here. He hadn’t been expecting anyone to find him out here. Not that he was hiding. He just… thought he’d be alone with his thoughts. 

And considering how many of them he had circling around in his head at the moment, it was feeling a little crowded with other people around.

“I’ve been looking for you.” 

“You could have just sensed for me,” Chris said with a shrug. 

“Phoebe said you were around the house somewhere,” said Leo. “I didn’t think I’d need to resort to magic to track you down. It’s a big house, but it’s not that big.” 

“Well you found me. What do you need?” 

“Oh nothing. I just… ” 

There was a certain apprehension in his father’s voice - nervous apprehension. Leo lifted something in his right hand that briefly caught the reflection of the porch light. It was glass. Chris could tell that much. A bottle of something. 

“I thought this occasion called for something a little stronger than champagne. Not that that wasn’t nice…” 

Chris sat forward in the adirondack chair he'd been lounging in to get a better look at Leo as he approached. In his other hand he was holding a pair of empty rocks glasses - the crystal Chris had always remembered being displayed in the hutch between the kitchen and the dining room but that he’d never actually drunk out of before. A more childish side of his mind suddenly conjured a question about whether or not he was even allowed to drink out of those, but he shook it off quickly. 

He was an adult for crying out loud.

“What is that?” he asked as Leo took a seat in the chair to the right of him and placed the bottle on the arm rest. 

“Lagavulin,” Leo replied. “16 years.” 

Chris was only mildly confused. 

“So that’s… what?” he asked. “Like scotch or something?” 

“Or something,” Leo confirmed with a laugh. He started pouring the amber liquid into one of the glasses, stopping when it was filled about a half an inch from the bottom. He handed the glass to Chris who lifted it straight to his nose, wincing at the way the smell alone managed to burn at his nostrils. 

“I thought Elders weren’t supposed to drink,” he said. 

“Yeah well…Right now I’m not feeling much like an Elder. I’m feeling like a father who wants to have a toast with his son. So..sue me.” Leo finished pouring a glass for himself and held it out in front of Chris. “Cheers,” he said. 

“Cheers,” Chris responded in kind. He pressed the glass against his lips and took a sip. Almost immediately, he started to cough. 

“It’s an acquired taste,” Leo said with a teasing smile. A knowing smile. One that seemed to convey that he’d been expecting this reaction. 

“No shit…” Chris replied with a wince. 

The older man brought his own glass to his lips and swallowed a hefty sip with ease. Meanwhile, Chris was still reeling. His throat was still burning. His sinuses still clearing. And yet… for some reason he felt drawn to take another sip. A smaller one this time. And it did seem to go down a bit smoother than the first. 

“What are you sitting out here for anyway?” Leo asked. “Aren’t you cold?” 

Chris shrugged. 

“I like October,” he said. 

It was true. He’d always had a certain fondness for the month. He liked the fall. He liked the crisp cold air. He liked the smell of burning leaves. Halloween. His birthday. Even the trauma that surrounded that day in his later years couldn’t take away his fondness for the season in general. 

“Well I guess that makes sense considering it’s your birthday soon…” said Leo with a nod before twitching his eyebrow slightly. “Which is… what day exactly?” 

“Hmm. Nice try,” Chris replied before taking another sip of his drink. He still grimaced a little bit at the taste this time, but the burning sensation was pretty much gone. 

“I don’t know why you won’t give us that much, Chris,” said Leo. “Your mom would appreciate the heads up. That’s all.” 

“If I tell you, it could change,” Chris explained. He happened to like his birthday. He was a Scorpio. The epitome of a Scorpio. And he wanted to keep it that way. If Piper ended up going into labor early because of something he inadvertently changed by talking too much about the future he could end up being a Libra. 

He shuddered at the thought. 

“I guess you’re probably right,” Leo replied with a sigh. 

Chris looked over at Leo and cocked his head, observing him. It wasn’t the first time that day Leo had surprised him by unexpectedly taking his side. He’d done the same thing when Paige was coming down on him a bit hard earlier. It was something he wasn’t sure he’d ever get used to. 

Maybe the new him would be used to it. 

“You know… the night is still young,” said Leo. “Your mission is finished. Instead of sitting out here in the cold by yourself you could…” 

“What?” asked Chris as his father trailed off. 

“I dunno,” said Leo with a shrug. “Go out. Be a twenty-two year old kid for once. Head to P3 and have some drinks with people your own age. Find a girl.” 

Chris scoffed and his face curled in something between confusion and repulsion. This was uncharted territory between the two of them. The Leo he knew would have been too morally upright and spiritually ‘enlightened’ to even share a drink with him. He couldn’t fathom the father he knew advocating for him to find some random woman to hook up with. Sex was not a topic that they spoke about. Not even when Chris has gone through puberty. His uncle had given him that talk.

And Wyatt. 

The less sanitized version anyway. 

“I’m just saying it wouldn’t be hard, you know…” said Leo as he took in Chris’ perplexed expression. “You’re not all that rough on the eyes. Especially now that your mother finally coerced you into getting a haircut.” 

“She didn’t coerce me,” Chris argued. “It just wasn’t exactly high on my priority list.” 

“You might have a surer bet at Magic School, though,” Leo continued, ignoring Chris’ protestation about his hair entirely. 

“What do you mean?” Chris asked. 

“Oh come on,” Leo said with a smile and an amused chuckle. “You haven’t noticed the way Juliette looks at you?” 

“Juliette?” Chris asked. He wasn’t even sure who Juliette was. Unless… “Oh. Right.”  

Juliette was one of the younger teachers there. More of an apprentice really. She was studying to become a potions master. He’d run into her a few times while he was there talking to his mom or doing research. She did always seem to be pretty smiley whenever he was around. And come to think of it she also always seemed to find ways to touch him. His arm. His back. His knee. But, in truth, he hadn’t really given it any thought. He had other things to worry about. 

Besides, he wasn’t sure what exactly had happened to her in his future since he had no memory of her from his youth. But in this future she could very well grow up to become one of his teachers. And that was a can of worms that was really best left not opened. 

“She’s pretty.” 

“She’s twenty years older than me,” Chris argued. 

“I’m fifty years older than your mother.” 

“That’s different,” said Chris with a grimace. “Besides… I’m really not interested.” 

Leo pursed his lips and nodded. 

“Yeah…” his father said. “That’s probably for the best anyway.” 

It hadn’t been a serious suggestion. Chris knew that. The Leo here might be less uptight than his own father, but at the end of the day they couldn’t be that different. He wouldn’t have even broached the topic if he thought there was a chance that Chris might actually act on it. He was far too by-the-book for that. 

In the end, there had to be a part of Leo that inherently knew that Chris wasn’t going to take him up on that little piece of advice. He must have had some kind of insight on the matter. Insight that Chris didn’t even seem to have himself. One thing that he knew for sure though was that his strange lack of interest was far more complicated than simply wanting to avoid any future consequences. 

“I don’t know why… ”  

It must have been the scotch. There was no other way he could explain his sudden desire to open up about his feelings regarding that particular issue. To open up to Leo no less. 

“It’s okay to still be grieving, Chris.” 

Leo’s response stopped him cold. 

He just sat there for a few seconds, staring open mouthed at his father and feeling as though the man had shot a darklighter arrow right through his heart. 

Grieving ? 

No. He wasn’t grieving. He’d done that. He’d moved on a long time ago. He hadn’t had time to lose himself to grief. He had a mission to complete. A job to do. Besides… it’s not exactly like they’d ended on the best terms. And it was so long ago. He took a couple weeks to wallow in self-pity and then it was on with the plan. He hadn’t thought about it in months. 

He wasn’t grieving. He was already grieved. 

“It’s been a year.” 

“Trust me…” Leo replied with a sigh befitting of his eighty years of life experience. “A year is not that long.” 

“No I… That’s not what it is. I don’t - ”

“You never let yourself mourn, Chris,” Leo insisted. “You threw yourself into your work and buried it. And now that it’s over, it’s going to start coming up to the surface again. That’s normal.” 

“But I…” he stopped himself. 

All of a sudden the idea of arguing the point seemed so fruitless. There was a tightness in his chest. A prickling behind his eyes. His father was right. Deep down Chris knew he was right from the start. He just didn’t want to admit it to himself. It felt weak. It felt irrational. The things he was feeling… they didn’t make any sense. 

“I don’t know why I feel like I need to be faithful to a dead person,” he said.  "Especially when I - ” 

When he already hadn’t been. 

Chris closed his eyes as an image of Mist suddenly flashed in his mind. Her long blond hair. Bright blue eyes. Creamy skin. Her soft pink lips opened in pleasure as his name slipped between them. 

A tsunami of guilt washed over him. Maybe that was part of the reason why he’d never let himself fully grieve. Part of him felt like he didn’t have any right to. All the things he had done when he’d first gotten here… He’d betrayed her long before she’d betrayed him. 

He didn’t deserve to grieve her. He’d done things when he’d first gotten there that would have sickened her. Things much worse than cheating on her with a Valkyrie. Things that Wyatt would have done. He had no right to mourn her. And he didn’t have much of a right to his father’s compassion, either. 

“You were right about me, you know,” he said. 

When he opened his eyes to look at Leo, his father was looking at him with confusion written across his furrowed brow. 

“What are you talking about?” 

“You were right about me,” Chris repeated. “I sent you to Valhalla. I scattered your orbs. I slept with Mist. Got her to trust me - to convince her sisters to trust me. And then I killed three of them to get their pendants. You were right about all of it.” 

Leo stared at him, the creases in his brow intensifying. 

Chris knew what was coming next. The shock. The outrage. The yelling . It was a good run - this conversation. One of the longest he’d ever had with his father before the screaming match began. Nevertheless, he felt like he was having it under false pretenses. 

In some ways, it would be a relief. This new nicer version of Leo was starting to feel a little Stepfordy in many ways. Unreal. Too good to be true. The dynamic between him and his actual father might be unpleasant, but at least it was authentic. At least Chris knew how to navigate it. Returning to that might actually be a comfort. 

But, apparently this Leo didn’t feel like playing along. 

“I know.” 

“You know? ” 

“Did you think I didn’t?” The confusion on Leo’s face only seemed to be growing. “I mean… the sleeping with Mist part is news to me. But the rest of it..” 

“I…” Chris said, tripping over his words. “I thought you… When you gave me back that pendant I thought that -  I dunno - that I convinced you that it wasn’t - ”

“I’m not an idiot, Chris.” 

“No. I know. But you - But I…” Try as he might, he couldn’t seem to gather his thoughts. “So what? You’re just okay with this? I killed them, Leo. In cold blood. I trapped you there. If things had gone according to my plan you might have been there a lot longer than you were. And you just… don’t care?” 

“Of course I care,” said Leo. “It’s just that I’ve also come to realize that you care. A lot more than you ever let on in the beginning. How long have you been torturing yourself over this?”

“I…” 

He didn’t really have an answer. For a long time. Longer than maybe he himself realized. He’d convinced himself for a while that it was for the best. But in truth, sending his father there had never felt as glorious as he thought it would. 

“I thought you knew that I knew,” said Leo with an undercurrent of love in his voice that made Chris feel slightly uneasy. “I thought you knew that I forgave you for that a long time ago.” 

“You forgave me?” 

Leo sighed. 

“It’s not exactly like I’m proud of the things I did around that time either.” 

“What do you mean?” Chris asked. 

“I threw you into a curio cabinet,” said Leo. “I punched you in the face. I threatened you with a sword. I almost had you recycled.”  

“You didn’t know.” 

“I should have,” Leo said, emphatically.  

“I didn’t tell you. If I had been honest from the start - ”

“You shouldn’t have had to tell me,” Leo insisted. “A half-witch half-whitelighter with my eyes, my wife’s face, and my father’s first name showed up from the future and I was too stupid to see what was right in front of me.” 

An odd feeling settled over Chris at the sound of those words coming from the lips of the man sitting next to him. He didn’t realize until just now how much he needed to hear them. 

As much as he liked to convince himself that his parents’ reaction to him in the beginning was exactly what he wanted, there was always a small part of him that knew that wasn’t entirely true. Sure, it was what he planned for. But planning and wanting were two very different things. What Chris really wanted in some deep down juvenile sentimental part of his soul was for both of them to somehow recognize him instantly. The moment he showed up in a flurry of orbs he wanted his mother to throw her arms around him and call him ‘Peanut.’ He wanted his father to acknowledge him with pride rather than suspicion. 

Things hadn’t really worked out that way… Though in a lot of ways he only had himself to blame. The more angry and suspicious they acted of him the more angry and hurt Chris became. Which in turn only made him act in ways that made them angrier and even more suspicious. 

It had been a vicious cycle. 

“I didn’t exactly make it easy for you.” 

“No. You didn’t,” Leo replied with a scoff. There was a slight scold to his voice, and for a moment Chris actually felt a little ashamed of himself. “It’s not like I’m suddenly happy with the way you went about things at the beginning…” 

“I know… I - ”

“ But… ” Leo interrupted, not allowing him to finish his thought. His father paused for a second. He let out something in between an audible groan and a sigh. His jaw tensed. His knee started bouncing rapidly up and down and Chris felt a sharp pang in his heart. 

Wyatt used to do that. 

A lot. 

When he was anxious or restless or unsure. 

Of course that was before… 

Though maybe he still did it. Chris wouldn’t really know. It had been so long since he’d known his brother as anything other than an enemy. Maybe if he did have to be around him for any significant length of time he would be surprised about all the ways that he was still just… Wyatt. Still just like their father in all the ways that Chris was not. 

“But… as much as I hate to admit it. I’m…” Leo trailed off again. He glanced down into his glass, as if the liquid inside would somehow help him figure out how to communicate whatever it was he was trying - and struggling - to say. “Well… I think I’m beginning to see that sometimes the ends do justify the means.” 

Chris was stunned. 

“Um…” he said. “Okay…” 

“Sometimes, ” Leo interrupted again. Emphatically. He accentuated his point by looking Chris firmly in the eye. “In extreme circumstances. When there are no other options.” 

“Right,” Chris said with a nod. A small laugh bubbled up from his chest. “Wow. I gotta say… I never thought I’d hear you say that.” 

That was an understatement. Not only did he never expect to hear those words come from his father’s mouth, he also never thought he would live to see his father concede something like this to him. His dad never let go of an opportunity to put Chris in his place. It was yet another way this Leo was illustrating that he and the father Chris knew were entirely different people. 

And he couldn’t help but wonder when exactly they had become that way…

“The events of our lives shape who we become, Chris,” said Leo, almost as if reading his mind. “You being here. Now. It’s a pretty big one for me. I’m hoping that I won’t be the same father you grew up with. I’m hoping… Well I’m kind of hoping that I’m already not.” 

Silence fell between the two of them as Chris sat there regarding the man, trying to find some trace of insincerity or duplicity. 

There wasn’t any.  

He didn’t quite know what to say. Chris wasn’t exactly the kind of person to provide him with some kind of overly emotional sappy validation. It just wasn’t the type of thing that he was comfortable with, and he doubted that would change. Even in the new future. After all, he was still a Scorpio. For now. 

Still… he felt like he owed the man some kind of affirmation. Some kind of acknowledgement that his efforts to change the kind of father he would be in the future hasn't gone unnoticed. 

“Dad?” 

It wasn’t the first time he’d used the term. He’d used it quite a few times in the past week or so. It was, however, the first time in this timeline or the last that he’d used it in such a genuinely beseeching way. Beseeching in an uncharacteristically personal way. Not as a witch to a whitelighter or a novice whitelighter to an elder but… as a son to a father. One in desperate need of some kind of advice and perspective. 

“Yeah?” Leo answered with a smile. 

“Do you…” Chris paused. He took a deep breath. Part of his mind was screaming at him to stop talking now - to not ask the extremely vulnerable question that was perched at the tip of his tongue. But the other part… the other part was feeling for the first time in his life like it might actually be safe to ask his father for some guidance. “Do you think… Bianca… would forgive me?”

“That might be a harder ask.” 

Chris nodded. Deep down he knew that was the truth. Deep down, he’d always thought of the moment he’d jumped through that time portal in the attic and left her behind as a goodbye. He hadn’t actually expected to see her again. Not the Bianca he knew in any event. 

He did want to marry her. That wasn’t a lie. He wanted a future with her more than anything. But the ring he’d given her was more of a symbol of a fantasy they were hoping to create rather than a practical question. 

“But Chris…” Leo continued. “The future you’re going back to… it’s a different time. Full of different people. Maybe you’ll be able to start off your life with her on a clean slate.” 

“If I have a life with her at all.” 

“If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my time as a whitelighter, it’s that fate is a very real thing. And it’s persistent.” 

“Maybe…” Chris replied with a scoff. 

“If you were meant to be with her, she’ll be there.” 

“What if I wasn’t?” 

Leo sighed again. 

“Well… then… It's like I said before. It’s okay to still be grieving.” 

Chris sat with that for a little while. He had a feeling he’d be doing a lot of grieving in the days to come. And not just for Bianca. 

“You know…” said Leo.  “When that all went down, your mother mentioned that she was… four or five years old?” 

Chris turned his head slowly to look over at his father. His knee was bouncing again, and a strange feeling settled in Chris’ gut. 

“You’re not about to give me a lecture about being with an older woman are you? After the comment about Juliette?” 

“No,” said Leo with an uncomfortable laugh. “No I just…” 

“What?” Chris asked, defensively. 

Leo sighed. 

“I’m just kind of hoping that you won’t have to grow up so quickly this time around,” he said. “That you’ll be able to stay a kid longer than you have in your timeline. As long as you can.”  

“So what?” Chris asked. “You’re saying she might be… too mature for me or something?” 

“It’s possible,” said Leo. “Things are going to be different. You’re twenty-two Chris. Hopefully you’ll just be finishing up college. And she… well… She’ll probably already be knee deep into her career. Your worlds won’t be overlapping the way they were in your past. You’ll be in entirely different stages of life. You might want to prepare yourself for that.” 

College. 

He’d never really thought about it. After all, he hadn’t even been able to finish high school. 

Is that really what he would be doing right now in a future that wasn’t fucked? 

Studying computer science like all the good Bay Area boys did at… what? Berkeley? Stanford? San Francisco State? 

Would he have a different girlfriend there? Some chippy blonde sorority girl that he didn’t know? That he hadn’t faced profound trauma with? Whose love and affection hadn’t been tried and tested several times over by extreme adversity? One that was praying to get engaged before they finished their final semester just so that she could keep up with all her friends on… Facebook? Instagram?  Some other social media site that might come along to take their places in a future that didn’t fall apart? 

It all sounded so boring. 

The grief filled feeling settled in his stomach yet again. Though it was so much bigger than just Bianca this time. It was all encompassing. Grief for an entire life. A life that in so many ways he hated, but one that was nevertheless… his. 

His entire life. 

“Maybe I shouldn’t go back.” 

Leo said nothing for a second. A look of sadness and regret passed over his face, and Chris could tell that he was weighing his words carefully, worried about upsetting him. Still, it didn’t keep him from saying the truth that they both knew out loud. 

“You can’t stay here, Chris…” he said. “Not with baby you about to be born. It’s too… It would throw things too off balance. Not to mention the havoc it would wreak on your powers. Yours and… well… his.” 

Chris nodded. He knew his father was right. But the idea of going back to a future that he knew nothing about was getting more and more unsettling by the minute. It was funny really… with all the planning he’d done, all the prep, all the plotting, scheming, obsessing… with all of that he’d never really thought about what would happen after . It was like he was facing it for the first time. And none of it seemed very appealing to him. 

“Then maybe it would be better if I just… ceased to exist.” 

“What are you saying?” Leo asked, concern and slight panic written across his face. 

“I dunno.” 

Chris shifted in his chair, almost as if trying to physically escape his thoughts.  He didn’t know how to explain what he was thinking. He wasn’t exactly sure what he was saying himself. He didn’t want to die . And he didn’t suddenly regret his timely conception in this timeline. In fact he was very grateful that he hadn’t ceased to exist nine months ago. He just… he suddenly felt like he didn’t belong anywhere. He didn’t belong here. He didn’t belong in the future - not anymore. He felt almost like a ghost, observing the world around him but not really having any place in it anymore. 

“Chris…” Leo pleaded, softly. “You saved the future. You made a better life possible. You deserve to live in it.” 

“Not quite fair for your Chris though, is it?” 

That was an understatement as far as he was concerned. He couldn’t get away from thoughts of his alternate self going to bed one day with memories of a happy functional life and waking up to all the trauma that he had lived through in his. Or worse - the happy well adjusted version of himself completely ceasing to be all together to make way for him to replace him entirely. An interloper in a life that the other him had created for himself that he had nothing to do with. 

Not really. 

“You are my Chris.” 

Chris scoffed. He scrubbed his face with his hand and fought an urge to snap. He was getting a little tired of the overly sentimental proclamations of unconditional love. What he needed from his father right now was a real conversation. A discussion about the cold hard truths. It wasn’t pleasant to talk about, but the cold hard truth was that this Leo was going to have a lot more love and affection for the baby about to be born in a couple weeks than he held for him. And all Chris wanted was for him to simply acknowledge that. 

“But that’s the thing isn’t it?” Chris asked. “I’m not. It’s not my life anymore. The people in whatever future I go back to… those people are strangers. I mean this…” Chris gestured between himself and Leo and at the bottle sitting on the armrest of his father’s chair. “ You… You’re a stranger. This isn’t - You’re not my dad.” 

“Chris…” Leo said pleadingly. It was a familiar tone of voice these days. Though one that told Chris that the man had no idea what he was trying to say. “Please. You know that I - ” 

“That’s not - ” Chris interrupted himself. He set his glass down on the armrest of his chair and rubbed at his tired eyes. “You don’t understand what I’m trying to say.” 

“Then explain it to me,” Leo replied. There was a level of patience in his voice that to Chris only seemed to prove his point. 

“My dad…” Chris began. 

He closed his eyes for a second, conjuring a picture of the man that Chris knew as his father in his mind - or trying to at the very least. It was difficult these days. It had been so long since he’d spoken to the Leo of his time. Years. And the more time he’d spent in the past the more he found this less weathered less tired version of his father’s face creeping into his memories, imposing itself over the image of the person Chris had grown up with - the person who the last time they had spoken had told him in no uncertain terms that he was on his own. That he couldn’t help him. That he had other obligations to the magical world. To innocents. To everyone but his own child.

If the Leo sitting across from him now thought that his commitment to the Elders after the Titan incident was something that couldn’t be shaken, he would be stunned at the severity of it where Chris had come from. In this time, Elders might be an endangered species, but in Chris’ time they had been rendered practically extinct. At the hands of his brother, no less. 

“My dad would never do this with me,” he continued. “I can’t remember the last time we had a conversation that didn’t involve screaming. The idea of having a drink with him… it wouldn't happen. He was too self-righteous for that. The consummate Elder. Even if he wouldn’t have morally objected to it, he never would have found the time. He was too busy helping everyone else to bother with me.” 

Leo was quiet for a moment. Chris could see the wheels turning in head. 

“Maybe I…” the man started, timidly. “Maybe he just -  Maybe he trusted that you could take care of yourself. You know? That you’d be okay. You’re… You’re not exactly incompetent, Chris. You’re so smart. And capable. And - ” 

Chris interrupted him with a dark laugh. He sat back in his chair and threw back what remained of his drink in one fell swoop before reaching for the bottle and pouring himself some more. 

“I take it all back…” he said, shaking his head. “Maybe you are my dad.” 

Leo was gazing at him, horrified. 

But, strangely, Chris felt a certain level of comfort at hearing those words pour out of Leo’s mouth. 

There was no denying that the repairs his father had been attempting to make to their relationship over the last few weeks had been appreciated. But there was also a small part of him that was beginning to feel a little gaslit by the entire situation. The amount of ‘I would nevers’ and ‘that’s not who I ams’ that flew out of Leo’s mouth over all this time had left Chris reeling, especially as his actions seemed to more and more line up with his sentiments. 

It was confusing. For a while it had left Chris doubting everything. Questioning everything. Replaying tortuous conversations with his father over and over again in his mind, wondering if he had been delusional all this time.

Seeing a small seed of the man Chris had actually grown up with in the man sitting next to him now was strangely comforting. 

The rationalization of leaving Chris to fend for himself… It had come so quickly. So naturally. So effortlessly. 

It even kind of sounded like a compliment. 

His future self would be proud. 

Chris braced himself for the wave of apologies and promises that were about to be sent flying his way, but he was surprised to see that the look of self-pity that usually marred his father’s face during these conversations the last few weeks was gone.

‘’You shouldn’t have had to,” said Leo. 

Chris shrugged and looked away. 

“It is what it is,” he said. “It’s fine. I’m fine.” 

“Chris.” 

He looked over at Leo again. There was an uncompromising look of determination of his father’s face. 

“You shouldn’t have had to,” Leo repeated. “All those things I said about you - they’re true. You are smart and capable. You can take care of yourself. But you never should have had to. I never should have let you. I’m not going to make that mistake again. I promise.” 

“I’m sure your Chris will appreciate it.” 

“You are my Chris,” Leo said, repeating the sentiment he’d shared before with far more emphasis this time around. “I love you. Every version of you. Forever. I love you no matter what timeline you come from. And I’m not going to let you talk like this.” 

“You said yourself the future will be different. I’ll be different…” said Chris. “Besides… you’ll actually know this version of me. You barely know me at all.” 

“It doesn’t matter.” 

Chris scoffed again. 

“Please…” 

“It doesn’t, ” Leo insisted. “Maybe you’ll understand that some day when you’re a father.” 

Chris grimaced. 

Him. A Father. 

The idea was absurd. 

The thought of bringing children into the future he came from… it was preposterous. Magical children at that. They’d have targets on their back from the moment they were born. They’d be hunted. Reviled. And the targets on his childrens’ backs would be even larger than the average magical child. The bounties on their heads would be small fortunes. The nieces or nephews of the all powerful Wyatt Halliwell himself…

Besides… he really wasn’t very good with babies. 

“Don’t give me that face,” said Leo with a shake of his head. “You’re young. It may sound unappealing now. But give it ten or so years.” 

Once again his father was failing to get the point. He was talking about his Chris. Maybe his Chris might consider becoming a father when he hit his thirties. Leo was still thinking about them like they were the same person. And they weren’t. 

Ten or so years…. 

What did that even look like? He couldn’t wrap his mind around it. For him ten years was 2036. It seemed entirely unfathomable to him. He could barely even wrap his mind around what to expect in the new 2026 he’d created for himself. Adding ten years onto that… it made his head pound. 

“I’m not saying it’s not going to be complicated,” said Leo. “But we’ll figure it out. Magic works in mysterious ways, but it always works.” 

Chris breathed out a laugh and a solemn smile spread across his face. 

“Paige used to say that.” 

Leo looked at him, confused. 

“ My Paige…” Chris clarified. 

“I thought you said Paige was dead.” 

Chris nodded and bit his lip. 

“Yeah… I lied.” 

“Of course you did,” said Leo. 

Chris could hear the disappointment and disapproval in his tone. He’d become well versed in it over all his years. He wondered if that would ever change. In this new future would he be different? More honest? Less manipulative? Or… was this simply who he was at his core? 

Maybe it was a good thing Leo was getting used to this now. Maybe it would be easier for them in the future if he knew going into raising baby Chris that he was always going to be a slight disappointment to him. He was always going to be different. They were always going to be butting heads. He was always going to have nothing in common with Leo. Or Wyatt. Or any part of his paternal lineage it seemed. 

They sat there quietly for a few seconds. Both of them nursing their drinks. There was a look of pensive concentration on Leo’s face - one that Chris was hesitant to ask about. 

“You know… my dad… he did this with me before I went off to the war…” Leo said, somberly as he swirled his glass of scotch around in his hand and took another sip. “This was his favorite.” 

Whatever Chris thought his father was about to say, that hadn’t been it. His curiosity was piqued in a way that he’d never expected - in a way that he almost didn’t want to admit. 

“I’ve been thinking about him a lot lately. Ever since… well… ever since I found out about you I guess. Your name…” Leo asked. He looked over at Chris suddenly and the moment they made eye contact Chris felt a sudden rush of adrenaline course through him. His heart started pounding a little bit. He felt… nervous almost. Intrigued.  “Did I ever tell you about him?” 

“Not really,” Chris responded with a shrug betraying his actual interest. He took another sip of his drink. “You never told me much of anything.” 

“Right…” 

He hadn’t meant it to be a dig. 

Regardless, Chris could hear the wince in his father’s voice, one that implied that his comment had burned the man far more than the scotch they were sharing had burned him. 

Thankfully, Leo said nothing in response to his comment. He simply took another sip of his drink and turned his head away from Chris. And in the seconds that followed, he hit Chris with a bombshell that he wasn’t quite sure how to process. 

“You remind me of him, you know…” 

Chris blinked. He wasn’t sure he’d heard him correctly or if they were still talking about the same person. Surely they weren’t…  Surely he must have heard that wrong. 

“Who?” he asked. 

“My Dad,” Leo confirmed before letting out a dry laugh. “ Christopher. It’s funny how that worked out.” 

The slight intrigue Chris had felt at the beginning of their conversation had multiplied exponentially at hearing those words. Still… he didn’t let himself get overzealous in prodding his father for answers. He stayed calm. He kept his face neutral. 

“How so?” 

“Oh…” Leo said with a sigh as he scratched at his temple. “He was…” 

Chris braced himself for whatever was coming next. He was what? Neurotic? Pessimistic? Sarcastic? Manipulative? Obsessive? One of the many other delightful adjectives he’d heard bandied about by his aunts and his mother over his time here? Emotionally unavailable? That was one of Bianca’s favorites in their worser moments… 

“He was a tough nut to crack,” Leo finished.

It hadn’t been what Chris was expecting. Though… in truth he wasn’t sure what he was expecting. 

“He was a hard knocks kinda guy, you know?” Leo asked. “Real tough exterior. He pushed people away. He was hard to get to know. But when you did… He was a good man. He didn’t love easily but he loved hard .” 

Chris was speechless. 

“I think it was the war…” his father continued. “World War I that is. That made him the way he was. He lost a lot of people. His friends. His brother . He saw a lot of horrors. Worse than what I saw in the Pacific. Maybe even worse than anything I’ve seen in The Underworld come to think of it.”

When Leo’s eyes flickered over to meet his, Chris suddenly found his breath catch in his throat.  

“I feel like… like you might know something about that?” 

He felt tears starting to well up in the corner of his eyes and he had to fight the urge to flee. He still hadn’t stopped beating himself up over the embarrassing show of emotion he’d allowed his father to witness after the spider demon incident. He really did not want to let Leo see him cry again . 

But it was unnerving. Sitting there… being seen by the man who he’d always prayed would see him. Being seen by anyone was enough to put Chris on edge. And when it was Leo doing the seeing… well that just made it all the more raw. 

He didn’t know what to say. Though, thankfully, Leo didn’t seem to need him to contribute to the conversation at all. 

“I think sending me off to fight broke him,” Leo continued. “Though you’d never guess it from looking at him. He seemed so unphased. But.. he showed up one night before I left for basic training with a bottle of this and I think it might have been the most I’d ever talked to my father about anything in my entire life. Sometimes I feel like… like he knew it was goodbye. He’d lost too much already to hope that it could end any other way. And he was right… In the end.” 

With that, Chris tore his gaze away from his father. He looked down at the glass in his hand and it suddenly felt so much heavier than it had mere seconds ago. 

“Is that what this is?” he asked. “Goodbye?” 

Leo smiled at him somberly. 

“No,” he said. “This isn’t goodbye. Your war is over, Chris. Your life is just starting. And it is your life. It’s going to be an adjustment. But, we’re going to get you through this. Your mom and I… we aren’t going to let you flounder. I promise.”

Despite Leo’s impassioned plea, Chris still wasn’t entirely convinced that belonged wherever it was that he was going. But he didn’t argue. He just nodded and let another comfortable silence fall over them for a few minutes. He let his head fall back against the wooden chair behind him and closed his eyes. He was so tired. There were still so many thoughts swirling around in his head. Doubts. Concerns. 

But there was something about the pure conviction in Leo’s voice that made him wonder if just maybe things might actually be okay. 

It wasn’t often that he allowed himself to think that things could be okay. It was an odd feeling. 

Though… maybe it was one he should try to get used to. 

“I should get inside…” Leo said after a few minutes. “Paige mentioned something about the light in her room going out all the time a while ago. I should take a look at it - ”

“I took care of it,” Chris interrupted. “It was just a faulty breaker. It’s been tripping occasionally ever since the whole slime demon… thing… Anyway, I replaced it.” 

When he hoped his eyes and turned his head slightly to the right to look at his father, Leo had an expression on his face that Chris hadn’t ever seen before. His lips were curled up in a smile and there was a touch of delighted surprise in his eyes - one that was also accompanied by something that could only be described as a twinkle. 

Was that… pride? 

No. 

Surely not. 

Surely, after nearly twenty-three years of life, of fighting demons, of sacrificing for the greater good, of going back in time to save his brother… Surely he wasn’t finding out after all of that that the only thing he’d ever needed to do to get his father to look at him that way was to replace a bad circuit breaker to his aunt’s bedroom. 

And yet… 

“Right. Thanks,” said Leo. “I didn’t realize you were so handy.” 

Chris shrugged. 

“It was no big deal.” 

It wasn’t. And he didn’t understand why his father was looking at him like it was. 

“Was Wyatt handy like that?” Leo asked. “I mean… before he…” 

Chris scoffed. 

“Uh. No. Sorry,” he said. “Wyatt doesn’t know the difference between a Phillips head and a flat head. Why bother learning how to fix anything yourself when magic can do it for you?” 

“Hmm,” Leo said with a nod. “Good to know. I guess I’ll need to find something else for him then…” 

“What do you mean?” Chris asked, eyes narrowing in confusion. Leo just laughed softly and brushed him off. 

“Nothing…” he said. “Just… filing future information away.” 

Leo stood up from his chair. He gave Chris’ shoulder a squeeze and started making his way toward the door, leaving Chris alone once again with his thoughts and the bottle of Lagavulin.. 

It was funny really. Just a few short minutes ago, Chris would have bristled at the realization that he’d apparently let some kind of future information slip. Right now, however, he just couldn’t bring himself to be all that bothered by it. Maybe it was because his mission was over. Or maybe it was because he still wasn’t entirely sure why that particular piece of incredibly mundane information was so significant to Leo. But ultimately he wondered if the real reason was because he was finally starting to realize that those small pieces of information weren’t anywhere near as damaging to his future as he feared they might be. 

In fact… he was starting to wonder if they weren’t the key to securing a better one. 

“Dad,” he called, causing Leo to turn around and look at him expectantly. “The 24th.” 

Leo furrowed his brows. 

“What?” he asked, confusion written across his face. 

“My birthday,” Chris replied with a nod. “October 24th.” 

A smile spread across Leo’s face and an amused laugh escaped his lips - a laugh that Chris couldn't help but think was a very strange reaction to the information he’d just provided. 

“Your Aunt Paige owes me twenty bucks,” he explained

But, of course, that explained nothing. Chris just looked at him in utter confusion, slightly perturbed by the fact that apparently there were betting pools going on about when he would be born. And he didn’t understand why his father seemed to be so pleased with himself about guessing a date correctly. It’s not like it spoke of any deep insight into who he was as a person. It was pure luck. 

Wasn’t it? 

The smile on Leo’s face and the subtle nod of his head, however, made it seem like it was anything but luck. It made it seem like it was something more… Something personal. Something that spoke to the fact that for the first time in Chris’ life, it felt like his father might actually know something about him . About who he was as a person. 

“I knew you were a Scorpio.” 

The End