Archive of Our Own

Sigurd moves to attack, this time moving so fast that Ritsuka can’t even see him. His attacks land on Mashu with a deafening clang.

Mash writhes under the pressure, "Senpai! Exoskeleton, mobility dropping-- the remaining magical energy is… ku… ugh… not yet! …I can’t… fall… yet…! Senpai… Sen…pa.i…!"

Her legs give out with a yelp and Ritsuka goes to move to her side only to stop short as Sigurd steps forward.

"You. Don’t move." He glances at Mash "Now then… What was that just now? Because you are a hybrid? I was terribly shocked to hear you say that was all of your magical energy. It was like a hunter licking his lips when bringing down his prey …. Ah, that is wrong. You are no hunters, you are no heroes, and I am afraid you are not even warriors."

Sigurd slams his foot into Ritsuka's side, slamming him into the side of the Shadow Border, the impact reverberating through him with a cry.

Mash jerks trying to stand "Senpai! Ugh … Move... Move. Move! Orthenaus! Please!"

Sigurd huffs in disgust. "Pitiful child of man. This is mercy. Rejoice. The sword of your hero will reap your head. Humans. O humans. Sorrowful ones. There will be no tomorrow for you, just like how there will be no tomorrow for this world."

Mash cries out. "No, no…! Senpai, senpai, use your Command Spell on me one more time… Senpai… please!"

Sigurd's voice rings out with cruel intent "It’s useless. Know this, you will meet your death before your magical energy can be transferred. Farewell."

Mash screams in anguish. "Master!"

And then Sigurd moves so fast that there's only a split second for Ritsuka to react. He sees the sword swinging for his neck and he bares his teeth at Sigurd, refusing to turn away from his fate even as his head will be sliced from his shoulders, eyes steely with resolve and fixed on the hero in front of him.

To his surprise Sigurd's blade stops at his neck, the control needed to stop the swing so instantly and completely is astounding. The sword rests on his neck, and it's sharp enough when he swallows hard, it cuts into his skin.

Sigurd's eyes, or the goggles, are pure blue, the previous violent red nowhere to be seen, for a brief moment before they disappear behind crimson again.

"...Hmph. So this is the pride of a hero. You’ve narrowly escaped death, child of man." he pulls the sword away from Ritsuka's neck, sheathing it on his hip.

Ritsuka lets out a breath he was holding with a gasp, eyes wide with horror as Sigurd walks away as if without a care in the world.

"Master! Please don’t move…! You’re injured, since you took that kick from him… That’s why… for now, please don’t move …Senpai…" Mash collapses.

Ritsuka grits his teeth and launches himself at Mash embracing her in a bruising hug "Mash!"

"Senpai…"

Ritsuka turns to watch as Sigurd strolls away, glaring at him.

"You're neck…" she whispers.

Ritsuka touches the small cut, and shivers in pleasure, eyes widening at the familiar sensation renewed.

"Sen…pai?" Mash is staring at him with concern in her eyes.

He shakes his head. "We need to go check what's going on below deck, are you ok?"

She nods hesitantly, standing on shaking legs like a newborn fawn.

He stands as well, hand brushing over the cut, he lets out a small sound of pleasure as the pain aches in a beautiful agony.

He follows Mash slowly, clutching his side. 

***

Ritsuka sits by the fireplace in Gerda's home watching the dim embers flicker, Mash sits down beside him. "Is she asleep?"

Mash glances at him. "Yes she's asleep."

"Good." He rubs slow, smooth circles into his thigh.

"Senpai… isn't it too cruel? This world?"

Ritsuka blinked rapidly at her. "What?"

"I mean forced to give birth at 15, killed before you even reach your thirties, it all seems so terrible." She moved her legs up to her chest watching the fire.

"Mash… did you forget?" He asks gently.

She glances at him.

"There's no point getting attached, they'll die all the same when we destroy the tree of emptiness in this lostbelt." He says carefully.

"Senpai!" She cried out, before flinching and glancing toward Gerda's room.

"So you did forget. Or more accurately, you refuse to think about it." He watches her guardedly.

"Senpai… What happened to you? How can you say something so callous?" Tears begin to fill her eyes.

"Refusing to look reality in the face won't help anyone, Mash. It won't bring any of the yaga back, it won't bring Patxi back, and it won't save that girl's life." He looks at her, true sorrow in his eyes. "I didn't kill an entire species to turn back now, but I can't do it without you. We've always gone through singularities together, you've always been by my side, I've always relied on you. Can I do it again? Even if it will sentence us both to hell?"

She ducks her head, a wet gasp escaping her, her hair falling over her face.

Ritsuka suddenly straightens as if coming back to himself, before he curses and quickly embraces her, pressing her face into the crook of his neck as he rubs her back. "I'm sorry. I didn't want to make you cry, you've always been my rock, now let me be yours, ok? I'll take the blame ok? Forget I said anything, you were just following orders, ok? It was all me. I killed those yaga, I'm going to end this world, I'm sorry."

"No."

Ritsuka freezes, her voice rings out in the quiet room, it's strained with emotion but the steely resolve is unmistakable.

She pulls back. "Senpai, I'm with you, I'll follow you anywhere, even into hell." She whispers. "But that doesn't mean… It doesn't mean we can't have empathy. Even if we know what we're going to do in the end to Gerda and anyone else we meet in these lostbelts, we can still show them compassion, we can still be kind."

Ritsuka looks at her, really looks for a long moment, before he smiles heartbreakingly, tears beginning to fill his eyes. "You're right. I'm trying to harden my heart by not seeing them as people, trying to deny the weight of our sin, but that wouldn't be fair, would it?" He admits.

She nods. "It would be doing them a disservice."

He sighs, pulling her back into a tight hug before letting her go and moving to stand, offering his hand out to pull her up alongside him. "Let's go to bed, we'll probably have a long day tomorrow."

She nods. There's a long moment shared between them before she retrieves her hand.

***

The transmission goes out and Ritsuka is left staring at the empty space where it used to be.

"Master, we've got to help Gerda!"

He frowns and shakes his head. "Mash, the walls protect the villages, even if they wanted to, the giants can't get through."

"But what if we damaged it somehow when we fought the envoys? Then it'll be our fault if the village is destroyed!"

Ritsuka shook his head. "Scathach-Skadi controls the giants, she wouldn't let them hurt her 'children' when it's not the promised day."

"Master…"

"If anything it's a trap, only now does the Shadow Border get through, and it's to direct us to an exact location?" Ritsuka stands firm. "Absolutely not."

"Did I hear that right?" Napoleon jogs over, "we've got a village to save?"

"No. We don't. It's probably a trap." Ritsuka speaks before Mash has a chance.

"Mon Dieu! You aren't implying we're going to leave those kids to die, are you?"

"They're protected by walls, and Scathach-Skadi wouldn't let them get hurt, I'm tired, it's almost nightfall and it's a waste of time." Ritsuka bites out almost in a whine.

"Oh non, non, non! My Grand Armée would never abandon someone in trouble! You're right that the walls and wards are there, but I probably burst through a few wards when we first met! Allons-y! Let's go save some kids."

Ritsuka scowls. "Why bother, when the lostbelt falls--"

"Ritsuka!" Mash cries out. "Please. We can still… we can still be kind."

"Mash…" 

Napoleon slaps him on the back causing him to stumble. "Look sharp Private! We got a village to save!"

Ritsuka glances up and sees Napoleon grinning at him, he's at a loss for words as he stares searchingly at the Emperor, but right then, Napoleons surefire grin looks just like Mori's. He feels so stupid. Mori would never let children die on his watch, his heart aches at the thought.

He sighs and straightens, giving a pained smile. "Alright… Grand Armée to the rescue."

***

With Scathach-Skadi aboard the Shadow Border and Sutr just released everyone is on edge, and it's the queen who breaks the silence.

"First, I must speak to Fujimaru alone."

Everyone frowns, turning their stare to Ritsuka, who looks just as baffled as they feel.

"Me?"

"You're the last Master of humanity aren't you? Surely you will represent True Human History well."

He shifts from foot to foot glancing at Mash who shrugs helplessly.

He hesitates for a long moment before taking a step toward her. "Ok."

Scathach-Skadi gestures him forward to lead her to a private room. He takes her to his room, standing awkwardly watching her with awe. She shuts the door and quickly waves her wand in flowing gestures.

"There. We may speak privately."

He glances at his communicator to confirm any signal is blocked, before glancing up reproachfully. "Are you really going to make me defend Humanity on my own? I'm like 17."

"No silly boy," she glides forward effortlessly and he's struck by her beauty, her long purple locks, her deep red eyes, porcelain skin, untouched by the sun. He swallows. "We're here for your benefit, I thought you would like discretion in this matter."

He gulps and licks his lips, eyes widening in panic. "Wh--"

"I do not allow my subjects to come to harm, even if they do it to themselves."

The sound dies in Ritsuka's throat as he blinks rapidly, not really what he was expecting, though he's not overly pleased with this topic either.

"I don't know what you mean." He lies, eyes fixed on the ground.

Her hands darts out like a Viper as she catches his upper arm causing him to hiss as her thumb digs into the cuts that hide there, the most recent only a few hours old. "Here." She says her voice cold. "And there. And there." She gestures to his thighs with her free hand. "Of all my years of goddesshood, not one of my children have hurt themselves so purposefully, often and insistently, I wish to know your reason."

He pulls away, and she lets him, his pupils blown wide as endorphins and dopamine pump through him at the aggravation of his wounds.

"They're not… it's not important." He manages, rubbing his arm delicately, catching his breath, steadying it from the sudden, surprise onset of pain.

"I already told you, I have accepted you as my child, and thus I will not see you harmed. I don't see a point in healing them when you will simply make more, so I must get to the root of the issue to prevent them first."

"So you knew. Back then to." He says quietly, looking away with a touch of shame.

"Of course, I could smell the blood on you, I assumed it was somehow a mistake and healing you would fix the issue, but you remade the incisions." 

When they'd been thrown in the dungeon, he'd noticed his cuts had healed miraculously, he figured Scathach-Skadi had just cast a broad healing spell and not noticed the individual injuries, but it seems he was mistaken.

"An injury of the mind." She supposes "To self inflict harm on one's healthy body. Tell me how to help."

Ritsuka shook his head. "You can't. Not unless you want to rewire my whole brain." He says bitterly.

"Explain." She pushes, lips pursed, folding her arms.

He takes a deep slow inhale of breath before sighing. "You're not going to let me go until we resolve this?"

"Naturally." And she has the audacity to smile at him.

"My brain… it didn't… it doesn't… I don't know!" He scrubs his hands through his hair. "My brain didn't develop right… I think. Or maybe I wasn't born right… I don't know! The short version is my brain needs certain nutrients to function as it should and it can't… I don't know… make them? Absorb them? I don't remember. Look, the doctor who was telling me this used a lot of big words and was kind of droning on and I wasn't paying close attention."

Scathach-Skadi frowns at him, seemingly perplexed.

"Look, I have a lot of things wrong with me, and I was taking medication for it and it was helping and then…" he gestures vaguely. "Shit hit the fan so now we can't make any more, so… I do without."

"Mhm." She looked doubtful.

Ritsuka rubs his face and blows out a breath noisily.

"Ok look, this" he again swings his arms in a sort of 'all this' motion. "This is a lot to deal with when you're 17 and your brain doesn't work right and…" he goes quiet, eyes fixed on the ground. "When I cut I feel… in control. Like I have something to hold onto. It clears my head. Helps me think. I… like it. There's a reason… something about releasing happy chemicals… I think… but the point is…" his shoulders sag helplessly. "It helps."

She hums watching him as he withers under her gaze. The silence is oppressive and he hazards a glance at her only to flinch at her stern gaze, he rubs his thigh discreetly he hopes to help calm himself.

"I can't exactly rewire your entire brain." She says with some finality.

"Didn't think ya could." He mumbles.

"So then convince me to let you continue your journey."

"Wh-- hey! We just discussed why I am not qualified for this conversation. Also like! Not the time!" Ritsuka argues.

She shakes her head, a ghost of a smile on her lips. "Humans shy from pain, and yet your resolve is so steadfast you seek it out so as to better move toward your goal. Surely to fight so ardently for a far-flung goal you have some motivation more specific than 'to save humanity'. One does not slice open their flesh for 'all of humanity'. It is simply too abstract. You have a reason you fight so hard. What is it."

The entire encounter Ritsuka had been cowering, folding in on himself but at her words he straightens and fixes her with a hard gaze. "I have two." His tongue darts out to wet his lips before he starts. "The first is in the Russian lostbelt, there was a man, his name was Patxi, when I had given up hope he took a bullet saving my life. He made me swear on his life, on my own, that I would fight to restore True Human History. I had told him tales of it and he was so convinced that it was worth fighting for, that it was better than his world he would throw away his life to save a world he never saw. When we destroy the tree of emptiness, all the people inside the lostbelt disappear, replaced by True Human History. I swore to him I wouldn't let him, or his people, die in vain."

She watches him searchingly. "And the second?" 

Ritsuka's hand goes to the necklace Mori made him, the finest matcha in a glass cylinder and a silver chain, he fishes it out and cradles it in his palm, he swallows, feels his cheeks heat. "The man I'm in love with… he was a servant I summoned while fighting in the singularities. In these lostbelts, they're stuck in time, there would be no opportunity for me to summon him, actually if the lostbelts are to succeed, he never would have existed. If I ever want to see him again, I need to destroy these lostbelts. Every single one." He matches her gaze with his own steely resolve.

She examines him carefully. "And for these two people you would kill every one of my children? All of the people in Scandinavia? And all the people in the other lostbelts as well?"

He meets her eyes head on, his resolve immovable. "I would."

She shakes her head. "Very well. I can't very well dissuade someone with a blood debt or someone in love, nevermind both." She moves to wave her wand but stops short. "But Fujimaru, know that you are still my child, and I hate to see you in pain…" she glances at him, her face stricken. "If you can, please don't hurt yourself, or at the very least, do it as little as possible."

He looks at her, a heartbroken smile on his face. "I'll try, Your Majesty."

He lying.