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Hoseok sighs deeply the second he’s sure he turned off the live stream. Jimin watches with a fond smile but still worries. It’s his nature, he can’t help it really. He doesn’t like the way exhaustion clings to Hoseok’s bones, how he looks like he’s seconds from passing out right then and there on the sofa without even washing up.
A manager knocks on the door and gives them a quick thumbs up for a job well done, reminds them of their activities for tomorrow, and then shuts the door to leave them alone.
“I’ll order food for you.” Jimin says as he’s already reaching for the menu left on the table.
“My Jiminie looking after me.” Hoseok giggles but god even that sounds tired. At least he’s fond.
“Of course.” Jimin chirped happily and picked what he thinks will be prepared the quickest and called the reception to order it. Once he’s done he smiles back at Hoseok, “I mean it’s only fair, you spent so long looking after me.”
Hoseok giggles some more and oh he’s definitely loopy from being so tired. Jimin checks the clock real quick, tries to come up with a game plan on how he’s going to do this.
“Do you wanna shower before or after eating?” he asks.
“I don’t even know if I’ll be awake long enough to eat.” Hoseok says, his speech a little slurred. His eyes are hooded. Jimin smiles in sympathy. He knows how exhausting it is after a performance, he can’t imagine how bad it must be to do it alone.
“How about this.” Jimin decides to take the reins. “We eat, then I help wash you up, then we do your skin routine, and if you fall asleep I just carry you to bed.”
“That sounds nice.” Hoseok replies with a lazy smile. He then reaches for Jimin, making grabby hands at him. “C’mere.”
Jimin goes easily, finds his usual spot in the crook of Hoseok’s neck with a happy sigh. Hoseok wraps his arms around Jimin, twists himself until they’re both lying down properly and Jimin is on top of Hoseok like a human sized weighted blanket.
Hoseok’s body feels oddly frail under Jimin’s body, exhausted beyond measure. Hoseok’s easily one of the skinniest members in the group but Jimin swears he can feel whatever weight Hoseok had lost preparing for his concert.
“Ah, seriously hyung you were so cool tonight.” Jimin pipes up. His voice is a little muffled from how he’s hiding in Hoseok’s neck.
“Aish, stop it.” Hoseok laughs and pats Jimin’s ass. “I made some mistakes, my glasses flew off!”
“But it looked so cool.” Jimin wiggles his ass and plants a loud kiss on Hoseok’s neck. “Seriously you raised the bar so high for solo activities, how are we ever supposed to compete with this?”
“You’re Park Jimin.” Hoseok says. He says it simply. He says it easily. Jimin feels like drowning under the weight of its meaning though. There’s just too much love packed into the way Hoseok says his name. “You’ll blow away everyone.”
“Speaking of blowing.” Jimin pecks at Hoseok’s neck again. “Do you want a hand? Or a mouth?”
Hoseok snorts, “I’m too tired to even get hard.”
“I figured but still, its kind to ask.”
“Ask again in the morning.”
Jimin pushes himself to his elbows to look down at Hoseok with a soft smile. He takes in the tired lines around Hoseok’s eyes, how his smile doesn’t quiet feel right.
“You’re gonna sleep so good.” Jimin kisses Hoseok’s nose.
“Sleep or black out?”
“Is there a difference?”
Hoseok giggles again but he sounds so much more tired now. Jimin’s smile turns warm and he leans down to kiss Hoseok properly now, lazily. Hoseok lets him lead the kiss, humming against Jimin’s lips and tilting his head.
Any other day Hoseok melting under him would make Jimin proud of his lips but all he can think of right now is just how tired Hoseok must be. Hoseok isn’t even trying to kiss Jimin back. Jimin knows he’s enjoying it by the tiny hums he lets out and how his fingers are rubbing in small circles on the small of Jimin’s back but Jimin can’t stop thinking about just how tired Hoseok is.
Jimin talked with Hoseok’s management team when he got here and he knew. He knew that Hoseok had been ignoring his health, too stressed with his performance to look after himself. He hadn’t eaten well, he hadn’t slept well. And it isn’t just about the time he spent in Chicago either, Jimin knows Hoseok’s been stressed beyond belief for months now – spiraling into years when he really thinks about how long Hoseok’s been actually working on his album.
They’re a group of people used to having people around them to help take care of them. It’s ingrained into their bodies. You don’t really have to think about when your next meal is when you’re so used to someone eventually coming to drag you off to a restaurant.
It’s one of the smaller reasons why they decided to take a break from making BTS albums. They have to learn how to be their own people, learn how to live as individuals without having to navigate six other people.
It’s – Jimin’s not going to lie, it’s a little rough for him. For all of them, really. This isn’t what they’re used to. Jimin still doesn’t know how to waste time when he’s at his home all by himself without thinking how much more fun it would be if another member was with him in that moment.
But that’s why it’s important because –
Despite living separate lives now Jimin swears they’ve gotten so much closer. And honestly they aren’t really living separate lives that have nothing to do with each other, they work at the same company for fucks sake, but now Jimin can’t wait to wake up in the morning and go annoy his members in their studios.
Before this they would all wake up in the same dorm – or be woken up or be carried out the bed – and have breakfast in sleepy yet comfortable silence. Now Jimin wants to go and ask if they all ate that morning, if the food was good, if anything interesting happened in the less than twelve hours they were apart from each other.
Those were things Jimin never bothered to ask before because he’d be there. It wouldn’t be important because they would be together. He would be with them when they had breakfast, lunch, dinner. He would be there when they watched a cheesy drama with a disgusting amount of product placement.
Now he isn’t and he wants to know. He wants to ask all the questions and wants to know his members are happy.
Did you eat? What did you eat? Was it delicious? Did you get home safely? What show did you watch? Did you sleep well? I love you, be careful, it’s getting cold outside, there’s a traffic jam, I saw this funny meme. Did you eat?
Distance makes hearts grow or whatever the saying is.
But, clearly, Hoseok hasn’t been taking care of himself lately. He didn’t lose that much weight but still Jimin worries. At least he will have a more relaxed schedule once he gets back to Korea – at least Jimin thinks he will, he doesn’t know Hoseok’s schedule anymore.
The door rings with a muffled room service call and Jimin breaks the kiss.
Hoseok looks like he’s about to fall asleep, like Jimin’s lips were a lullaby. He barely manages to open his eyes to look at the door, clearly thinking the cons and pros of eating dinner or just going straight to sleep and – that won’t do. Jimin is here to look after him.
“Your lips are all swollen.” Hoseok pokes at Jimin’s lower lip and Jimin kisses it.
“Whose fault is that?” he asks before getting up and getting their dinner. He thanks the hotel worker for bringing it to them and pushes the fancy cart inside. “Come on, just eat and then you’ll take a shower.”
Hoseok makes a face as he sits up and oh isn’t that a clear sign of just how tired Hoseok is? Hoseok hates going to bed dirty, for him to consider skipping a shower to sleep…
“Eat.” Jimin orders but uses aegyo to soften the blow before sitting back next to Hoseok.
“Yeah yeah.” Hoseok mumbles. “Bossy.”
Instead of a reply Jimin just sits straight with a self-satisfied expression and stuffs a french fry into Hoseok’s mouth.
Eating is a silent affair, save for the happy moans with each bite. They don’t have to talk anyway, preferring the easy silence of their companionship.
Jimin watches Hoseok with sideway glances. Honestly he could probably stare straight on at him and Hoseok wouldn’t notice with how laser focused he is on his plate, his brows pinched together in a happy hum as he chews.
He looks much better with each bite he takes, with each sip of coke he drinks. Some energy returns to his body, a healthier glow to his cheeks. Maybe Jimin is making it all up, staring so hard he’s seeing things that aren’t there, but he knows Hoseok feels better.
He still has to make sure Hoseok showers after this but he gets the feeling that he won’t have to worry about Hoseok falling asleep while washing anymore.
“This is really tasty.” Hoseok mumbles in between bites.
“Aren’t I a genius?”
“This is why you’re my roommate Jimin-ah.” Hoseok snorts.
If Jimin’s cheeks turned a light pink then that’s no one’s business. Besides, Jimin’s pretty sure Hoseok’s too tired to notice it anyway.
Roommate. Roommate.
Even though they don’t even live in the same house anymore.
And this – this is a problem they all have.
They all love each other more than anything else in this world but they just can’t put a name to this thing they have with each other. It’s not the kinship other groups have, it’s not the same flavor of brotherhood Jimin’s idol friends wave around.
Family, maybe, but sometimes even that feels weak. They call each other anything and everything except for what they actually are.
And Jimin knows what Hoseok means when he calls him roommate.
“How’s everyone else?” Hoseok asks, either ignoring the silence for Jimin’s sake or because he genuinely doesn’t realize how hard Jimin’s heart is beating.
“Working hard.” Jimin replies. “Namjoonie hyung really picked up some steam recently, he’s been working super hard.”
“Flash of inspiration.”
“Hmm. Seokjin hyung is like actually becoming a MapleStory employee?” Jimin snorts and shakes his head. “I thought he was joking when he mentioned he was gonna work with them.”
“Ah, Jimin-ah, you know hyung would never joke about something as serious as MapleStory.” Hoseok laughs and it sounds more like the laughter Jimin’s used to hearing. Good. Good.
“You’re right.” Jimin laughs along. “I have some work here in the US after this too.”
“Oh, you’re not coming back home with me?”
“No.” Jimin pouts, puts on the cutest face he has. “Jiminie has to do work.”
“Jiminie will do great.” Hoseok says and pats Jimin’s shoulder. “Do you want me to stay with you?”
“No, you can go back, I’m a big boy I can take care of myself.” Jimin sips his drink. “You did your part of the work, now it’s mine turn.”
“Ooooh.” Hoseok smiles, something in his eyes Jimin can’t quite read. “Our Jiminie has grown so much.”
“Shut up.” Jimin lightly punches Hoseok’s shoulder. Hoseok does not shut up, in fact he laughs very loudly.
They finish up with hummed conversations. Jimin fills in Hoseok on things he missed in Korea, what everyone is doing, what he’s been doing. He talks about his family and how his mom is demanding to a get together with everyone else’s parents.
When they’re done Jimin picks up the empty plates and glasses, puts them neatly on the trolley and pushes the trolley out the hotel room, leaving it on the side. He writes a simple thank you note and leaves it on it too.
Hoseok’s on his phone, his expression sleepy but better than it was. Jimin glances at the clock. If Hoseok hadn’t been so tired he would have him take a long bath but Jimin isn’t sure Hoseok could stay awake for that long.
So he walks up to Hoseok and carefully pulls him to his feet by his dainty wrists. Hoseok’s taller than Jimin, not by much but it’s still a visible difference – at least Jimin is very aware of it. But still Hoseok’s dainty. Not weak by any means but he has bird-bones and a light frame.
Jimin pushes up to his tip toes even though he doesn’t have to and kisses Hoseok.
“Shower.” He murmurs against Hoseok’s lips.
“Shower.” Hoseok mumbles back.
Jimin leads Hoseok to the fancy bathroom and gives a quick look to figure out where things are. He turns on the water and makes sure it’s the right warmth for Hoseok’s sensitive skin.
“Are you coming in with me?”
Jimin pauses.
“Do you want me to?”
“Yes.”
“Then I’m coming in with you.” Jimin replies easily and turns around with a smile.
They help each other with their clothes and throw it to the corner. Shirts, pants, underwear, socks. Everything goes into a dirty pile. Jimin can’t remember the last time he showered with one of the members but it doesn’t feel awkward at all. It feels natural, if anything.
Hoseok’s steps in the shower first and groans happily under the warm spray of water. Jimin grins wide and follows behind him, giving a similar groan. The hectic pace of the last few days decides to catch up with him right then and there.
Jimin’s looking at the shampoos and conditioners when Hoseok pulls him into his hugs. He goes with a yelp, catching his balance the last second before slamming into Hoseok’s chest. His arms wrap around Hoseok’s body on instinct, both to catch himself and because this is what they do.
Hoseok drops his head down to Jimin’s shoulder and then noses against the crook his neck. Jimin runs his hand up and down Hoseok’s spine, the two of them standing under the constant stream.
They don’t speak. They don’t move.
Jimin focuses on how Hoseok’s ribcage expands when he breathes, how his muscles feel under his touch, on how soft his skin is. Minutes tick by without either of them moving.
“I missed you.”
Hoseok’s voice is small, smaller under the loud rush of water, but Jimin hears him. He hears him. He knows what he means.
“I missed you, too.” Jimin responds and kisses the side of Hoseok’s face. “Let me take care of you.”
Hoseok gives a tiny nod and that’s all Jimin needs. He carefully reaches for the shampoo and squeezes it to his palm.
It’s second nature from here. He doesn’t have to think about what he’s doing. He focuses on the smaller things, the important things. Hoseok shifting his weight from foot to foot, how it feels when his nails scratch against Hoseok’s scalp when he’s shampooing him, how Hoseok sags further into him the longer they stay like this.
Jimin wants to kiss him so bad.
But he has a very important task to finish. Kisses can wait.
The shower takes too long. The shower is over very quick. Jimin isn’t sure just how much time passes when they’re in there. It’s too long and not enough at the same time. Hoseok is half asleep in his arms when he pulls them out the shower.
Jimin puts on the fluffy robe on Hoseok and then wraps a towel around his own hips. He dries Hoseok’s hair first, smiling to himself when he spots the older man’s content smile on the mirror, before drying his own hair.
The skin care portion is a little trickier since Hoseok is so picky about how does it and Jimin has to spend some time reading the labels and putting all the products in a line to keep track of what’s what. Hoseok sleepily helps him out with it, lists off how to do it.
It’s a ten-step process Jimin has to actually pay attention to make sure he’s doing it correctly. He applies cream carefully, washes off the residue, and massages Hoseok’s skin. It’s a detail oriented affair but Hoseok starts dozing off where he’s sitting not even halfway through and Jimin takes that as a sign of job well done.
He cups Hoseok’s face and watches him drop into that sweet almost-asleep spot. He takes in the dewy glow on Hoseok’s skin now that the process is done, the healthy flush of his cheeks. His eyes trace the line of Hoseok’s eyes, the well-maintained brows, and the easy slope of his nose.
So pretty. Hoseok is so beautiful.
Jimin leans down and kisses Hoseok’s forehead and then carefully rubs the tips of their noses together.
“Come on.” He whispers and carefully pulls Hoseok to stand up. “Let’s get you to bed hyung.”
Hoseok’s mumbles out something Jimin can’t really understand but tries to stand up. Tries. Jimin ends up carrying Hoseok to the bed, holding back his giggles because he doesn’t want to bother Hoseok.
He has to hunt around to find Hoseok’s boxers and then steals one for himself too. He won’t bother trying to put pajamas on Hoseok when the man is already mostly asleep but he doesn’t want him to sleep butt naked either.
Jimin has to do some clean up around the room. Hangs the wet robes, charges their phones, properly dries himself off. Once there isn’t anything else sticking out to him Jimin crawls into the bed.
Hoseok’s already gently snoring by the time Jimin cuddles next to him. He looks so much younger when he’s asleep, so much more like the Jung Hoseok Jimin had met nearly a decade ago.
So much has changed since then but Hoseok is still the same Hoseok with that too big smile and too big heart.
Jimin watches him sleep. Watches his chest rise and fall, watches his eyelids flutter with whatever it is that he’s dreaming. Jimin hopes it’s a good dream, Hoseok’s earned it after all his hard work.
Carefully, Jimin pulls Hoseok closer and closer until the man is safely tucked into his chest. Hoseok’s nose is pressing into Jimin’s neck and Hoseok tries to shape himself to fit better into Jimin in his sleep. It’s instinctual.
Roommates.
Jimin kisses the top of Hoseok’s head and breathes in the strawberry smell of his shampoo. Falling asleep is as easy as loving Hoseok.
It’s the best sleep Jimin’s had in months.